


Ill Winds

by webkilla



Series: Webkilla's Zootopia Stories [2]
Category: Zootopia (2016)
Genre: Crime Fighting, Crimes & Criminals, F/M, Fluff, Romantic Subplot, the shipping is real
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-16
Updated: 2017-11-07
Packaged: 2018-12-16 03:36:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 16
Words: 87,092
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11820393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/webkilla/pseuds/webkilla
Summary: Its been a couple of months since Nick and Judy discovered the new strain of Nighthowlers, and its now being sold on the streets as the latest party drug. Also, city hall wants to attach an 'observer' to Nick and Judy for a while...Will Judy get in trouble with her family? Will someone burn down something else? Will Nick make funny noises when Judy clenches around his knot? Will the next conspiracy du jour manage to seize control of the city? Will Nick ever overcome the trauma of strapping a horny old goat into a spanking machine? Will Nick and Judy ever find anything more tasty than bacon to eat?This, and much more, in this second part of my grand Zootopia trilogy!





	1. Howloween

Zootopia was, as it so often was, abuzz with activity.

Something was always happening – in every district, in every neighbourhood – and right now the big happening was the annual multi-species late autumn holiday event known as Howloween. Even the city had put on a colourful costume of yellow, auburn reds and stark browns via the withered leaves on its trees and bushes, in anticipation of this quite popular annual tradition. Only the rainforest district had stayed warm enough for the trees and plants there to remain green, only stood help make the contrast to the rest of the street all the more stark.

Many considered Howloween, in its Zootopian incarnation, one of the great examples of how the city made all kinds of mammals come to together. Zootopian historians in turn vied for attention every year around this time to see who would get invited onto morning TV shows to, once more, explain the mixed history of the event:

“It is well known that the wolves gave us the name for the event, from the old name of a kind of autumn get-together. You could say they were the loudest in the debate to name it” the deep but sage female voice said, her sophisticated tone lending authority and a sense of wisdom to her words.

“Interesting professor. But knocking candy out of decorated barrels? It was cats that came up with that fun tradition, right?” the radio host’s young voice chimed in, sounding three lines of coke short of vibrating of his own skull.

“Yes and no. Cat merchants brought that tradition to the rest of us from the porcupines and their quill-weave puppets. A lot of other cultures had variations on that theme: Making an effigy of evil spirits and then beating or clawing it, to scare off those evil spirits and collectively vent pent up frustrations” the history professor explained.

“Who’s idea was it to fill the barrels with candy then? And weren’t the original porcupine puppets made to look like weasels?” the radio host said, sounding oddly giddy.

“To answer your second point first: Yes, but as inter-species relations improved once we all got a little more civilized, then that was replaced with barrels. It’s a lot easier to draw a more abstract pictures of an imaginary evil spirit on a barrel than model one out of quills. As for the candy? I’m pretty sure that was from the results of a very successful Happy-Chew advertising campaign about forty years ago – when I was a kitten we filled our barrels with dried fruit and sugar-biscuits” the historian added.

“Oh really? I’ll have to see if we can’t unearth some of their old jingles – and a sugar biscuit recipy. Barry, do we have any of those on file?” the radio host said.  
“I’ll look into it” said the deep throaty voice of ‘Barry’.

“Awesome, now Professor: To many the most important thing of Howloween is the costuming. That was a prey thing, right?” the radio host quickly fired off.  
“That is true. There are extensive historical records of various early medieval prey communities exploiting predator community superstitions by dressing up in scary costumes and raiding them. I suspect that it was a very cathartic event back then, for there are many indications that back then it was almost the only way that many prey got to get close to predators – and we know that physically and mentality we weren’t that different back then compared to now, so I’m sure that some used to visit secret friends and business partners” the historian lady noted, sounding pleased that the radio host had dialled in on that topic.

“Oh, like that story ‘Hamlet and Howliet’ with the pig prince and the wolf princess?” the radio host said excitedly.

“Indeed. That story was based on real historic dealings between the son of a pork baron and the daughter of a wolf warlord, where they met in secret and fell in love. Of course, the actual historical dealings between the old southern hog holds and the eastern wolf warlords were a lot more messy – There was no room for love there” the historian began, sounding like this was a topic she could speak a lot more on, but wasn’t sure if the host wanted to hear.

“Oh messy – sounds juicy. Sprinkle us with those wisdom nuggets professor!” the radio host replied eagerly.

“Well, it was during the peak of the Barbery-Cue Coast slave trade seven hundred years ago. It was a nasty business long since abolished, but the old hog holds and their pork barons sold their slaves and prisoners – both criminal and that of war – to their neighbouring wolf warlords who, well... ate them. It was a brutal flesh trade, but also appeasement writ large to prevent any invasions from the wolves” the historian noted somewhat bluntly, as there wasn’t really any way to sugarcoat that historical factoid.

“Makin’ bacon... wow, good thing we don’t have that today – instead we all get to be wage-slaves to our corporate overlords! Wee!” the radio host snarked, triggering a pre-recorded rim-shot and a dose of canned laughter.

“That is actually where that disgusting saying comes from – but yes, we have all thankfully moved on from nosh like that” the historian said, audibly sipping on some kind of drink

“Well, if rumors are to be believed then a grad student from ZU is looking for funding for some kind of bacon and pork product venture – something about printing meat? I can’t say I understand it, I mean I always thought that if you wanted to get paid for slipping someone your tube- steak you had to sign up with one of the better rent-boy agencies!” the radio jockey snarked, with innuendo most lewd aplenty.

The historian chocked briefly on whatever she had been drinking, before saying in an upset tone: “Really now – that is just disgusting”  
“What? The bit about the rent boys or the bacon?” the radio host chuckled, sounding highly amused.

“Eating the meat of other mammals! That is abhorrent! Abomination! It’s almost as bad as all the mammals who are willingly using nighthowler drugs these days! And that’s illegal!” the historian exclaimed, sounding very riled up, heavily implying that eating meat in that way should also be illegal.

“Oh my – spicy opinions on air! But the orange light it blinking, so we have to cut to commercials. Stay tuned to ZTR at 268FM, this is Rantz Freely, bringing the sizzle!”

Nick turned the radio off, seeing Judy coming back to the cruiser from the bakery. In her paws were two folded up paper bags, each with a delightful Friday afternoon treat – hopefully his had blueberries in it. She looked so happy; giddy almost – no doubt for the upcoming party.

Oh how he loved her smile – and that wasn’t just the mind-altering lovedrug now known as N2 which him and Judy had been exposed to a couple of months ago, that was talking – no, him and Judy had enjoyed a rather energetic relationship almost ever since he had joined the force.

It was fun to think back on for Nick while Judy got into the cruiser: It having turned romantic had happened so unexpectedly, at the end of his first week on duty, when she had hustled him so expertly, getting him drunk and then having her way with him. It had all just snowballed from that point on, though the N2 thing had come in handy later on: It had been a wonderful excuse to avoid having Bogo split them up, because now it would be discrimination based on a mental injury gained via work. The police union’s lawyers would eat Bogo if he did that – and thus, despite almost everyone on the force knowing that the two were dating, they were able to remain partners, rules be damned.

As she got up on the driver’s seat, Nick seeing her smile up close once more, his heart fluttered briefly and his tail jostled – and to think how close the world had been at losing that smile! When he had joined the force she had been so worn out. To think that it was the two of them starting to work together, and their relationship, which had saved her from complete burnout and quite possible depression – it simply felt good. 

Helping others, being appreciated – it felt damn good. No wonder Judy was addicted to it.

Unpacking his snack, Nick gestured towards a pack of young trick and treaters walking down the street. Downtown beats were always nice on Fridays since they were so relaxing, though that didn’t apply to the evening and night shifts, since they got to tangle with all the drunk and rowdy mammals – but daytime shift? Just perfect.  
That Howloween was always timed with the full moon didn’t help either. It would mean that there would be all kinds of fun burglaries that night – even criminals mammals with poor night vision would be able to have a go when the moon was out. Also, that nobody would bat an eye at mammals in masks, so there there would always be a few masked robberies for howloween.

Still, Nick and Judy – the dynamic fox and bunny duo – didn’t care: Their shift was ending in twenty minutes and they were heading back to precinct one.  
The next day, in the evening, the duo prepared themselves for an evening of fun and shenanigans: Clawhauser had organized an informal howloween party at a fairly nice club. It wasn’t an official precinct party, but there were a lot of mammals from the precinct coming.

Nick had to admire Judy’s almost hyper levels of excitement: “Really fluff? Calm down, you’ll smear your makeup like that”

“Shush – I’ve had blood dripping from my mouth more than once. I know how this is supposed to look” Judy replied, her tone leaning towards annoyed, but ultimately coming off more in a “Don’t harsh my buzz” kind of way. Dear gods he wanted to kiss her.

Chuckling, Nick clawed at the very faded patterns on the off-white long-sleeved shirt he was wearing. It had to be torn just right for his costume. The modified hockey mask that Finnick had gotten looked just perfect for Nick’s crazy killer costume. It was just on the good side of not being a too generic costume, and yet the utility belt with all the plastic hooks and plastic cut off paws looked just gauche enough.

“You know, for all your silly costume suggestions to me, then you’re taking your own costume awfully serious” Judy commented, putting down the small paintbrush next to the small jar of theatre blood.

Nick wiggled his hips and readjusted his utility belt and its plastic carnage: “Carrots, you would have looked adorable in that purple plastic bag and the antenna headband. It’s not my fault that you’re not enough of a gamer to see how great it would have been”

“Dressing up like someone called ‘diva’ might be fun – but I’m not wearing a big plastic bag as a costume. I want to be sexy scary!” Judy said, twirling around to present her blood-smeared mouth to Nick.

The fox hid his smirk behind his hockey mask: “Do you look sexy? Yes, that vampire dress is great on you – but scary? Not so much”

“Oh really? Just wait until I get my fangs on” 

Oh vampires. It was such a prey idea. No predator would bat an eye at blood – leave it to prey to come up with the idea of “mammal that normally doesn’t have faangs, suddenly has fangs, and now drinks blood!” – so silly, and yet so adorable.

Taking public transportation to the party – because neither of the two expected to be able to drive at the end of the night – Nick and Judy amused themselves with all the mammals in costume on the train. There were so many creative costumes, and even more very not so creative costumes. Many pictures were taken.

Before hitting the club the two pulled a big snack attack, filling their stomachs before the awaited deluge of club drinks and whatnot:

“Hmmm, these things used to be a lot more fun to eat” Judy commented, chewing on her flesh-alike tofu strips. She looked disappointed.

Nick shrugged, his mask obscuring his face: “Let me guess: Now that you’re tried the real deal, then fake meat isn’t that thrilling?”

Judy made a pained expression, her nostalgia souring her meal: The tofu somehow tasted even worse after what Nick had just said.

“Tacticalbacon?” Nick said, offering a stick from a cigar case. Judy picked one out, noting that Nick did actually have a real cigar in there as well.

Oh well, the bacon was a nice desert to round things off on, though she knew well enough to be stealthy about it. It would be bad enough if her parents found out that she was dating a fox – no, she didn’t want to even think about that kind of stuff if people learned of her meat-eating habit.

As they walked up to the club Judy groaned: Her taser had apparently slipped out of her thigh holster, which had been cleverly hidden under her spider-web patterned dress.

“Oh come on Judy – we’re off duty, we’re going to a party and we’re planning on getting drunk – we should not be armed” Nick admonished, picking up the standard issue ZPD size two taser and putting it in an empty pouch in his ghastly utility belt.

Judy shot Nick a... fluctuating look. She knew he was right – they had both learned at the academy that they shouldn’t bring arms if they knew they were getting drunk. It was simply asking for trouble. Still, you never knew if you would run into some criminals: “It just feels bad to not be prepared”

“Oh you bunnies, so emotional” Nick quipped, eliciting a painful shoulder-punch from Judy as she jumped up and jabbed him. They both laughed it off, while Nick nursed his shoulder.

The club was an impressive pick by Clawhauser: Three levels of simultaneous party, for the primary size categories of mammals, arranged in a large large horse-shoe shape. It had an amphitheatre vibe to it – it... hold on, this place was a converted theatre! No wonder it had this layout.

On the top level were all the rodents and smallest mammals, on the outer rim of the horseshoe so to say. It was a tide of pika, mice, rock rats and hamsters and then some, dancing to the energetic beats thumping though the club. In the middle Nick and Judy found themselves fitting in fairly well size-wise, with the inner section being the stomping grounds for the biggest mammals. It was arranged so that you went to the side of your section, then you would be at roughly eye-height with the mammals in the next ring.

This was particularly handy setup, since it was on the top level that the band was playing.

Judy spotted the poster with the band first – her reaction being particularly visceral: she spat out her drink.

“Judy, what the hell?” Nick blurted out, barely managing to dodge the spray – not that weird stains on his costume would look out place.

The vampire bunny pointed towards the band power next to the stage.

Nick instantly rushed over to the inner ring and waved over Clawhauser: “Dude – did you know what the band would be when you arranged this?” 

“Of course. I mean, they’re no Gazelle – our heavenly goddess who we all must worship – but they have some really good party songs” the fat cheetah noted, his retro space alien costume looking really good, if not very kitch.

Nick nodded. He wasn’t intimately familiar with the band, but trusted Clawhauser’s judgement and was familiar with their music from other sources: “Fair enough – though I’m surprised that you didn’t try to get us into wherever Gazelle is playing tonight”

“I looked her up – she’s playing and partaking in an exclusive Vinewood party. Only for the rich and famous” Clawhauser lamented, waving his very exotic looking and bright blue drink around.

Nick gave Clawhauser a sympathetic sigh: “At least you didn’t dress up like her. I just don’t think you can pull off those high heeled shoes – maybe if you dressed up like a Gazelle bodypillow?”

“Haha – can’t dress up as that, Bogo borrowed it”

And with that deeply disturbing bit of TMI Nick returned to Judy, where he found his girlfriend looking none too pleased, standing next to a table with a mostly empty drink glass: “Hey fluff, why the grouch-face?”

“Nick...” Judy said, her tone annoyed, hinting of mild anger. It also had that “If you truly love me you would know why I am upset” tone – which was never good.   
The masked fox darted around the doe before him, joining her in looking at the stage where the backup band for the headline artists was getting ready: “Yes darling?”

“I can’t believe Clawhauser arranged the party here when its these three who’ll be performing. All that these ‘artists’ sing about is sex, violence and money – even their artist names are all sex puns! It’s vulgar!” Judy bemoaned, gazing longingly towards the nearest bar. She knew well enough to pace herself, but if this was the music she would be listening to most of the evening, then did not want to be sober.

Nick didn’t see the problem – well, he understood Judy’s apprehension, but he didn’t share the sentiment: “Oh come on – one of them is called Nasty Nut and the new guy in their crew is called Bustah Nut”

“Ok I’ll give you that Bustah Nut is a bit of a raunchy stage name, but Nasty nut? You do realize that they’re squirrels right? They sort of have a thing for nuts?” Nicks noted, putting his right paw on Judy’s shoulder to both reassure her that how she was feeling as ok, but also to hint that she should probably calm down a bit.

Judy was not impressed – but gently grabbed Nick’s paw on her shoulder with her left paw, while pulling out her phone from her tiny ‘vampire purse’ which barely had room for the phone to begin with, and showed him something she had looked up.

It was the urban dictionary entry for “Nasty nut” – after skimming it for a brief second Nick let out a burst of laughter. (Go look it up yourself)  
“That’s not funny – it’s disgusting! Have you even ever heard what their songs sound like?” Judy said, putting her phone away.

Nick shrugged and gave Judy a comforting smile: “I have. Finnick loves these guys – hell, I think he was a fan of them before they rebranded themselves like this, but on the sly. But it was after they went from being Alvin and the Chipmunks to being DJ Deez Nuts and Nasty Nut, then he had them on all the time – hell, he will be so pissed when he hears we got to see them live here”

“Good for him – but I don’t want to hear them. Come on, let’s at least go down to the other end of the horse shoe, I need a new drink” Judy said, in that tone that wasn’t really a request but it was also well implied that if Nick didn’t comply and follow along then there would be trouble.

Further away from the stage, Nick and Judy saw a couple of their colleagues from their shift. Most of them were in the inner ring, but there were tables along the railing so you could ‘sit with’ mammals on the other levels.

Judy found Wolford’s ‘costume’ suspiciously similar to the ZPD standard issue undercover ram disguise – to which end he conceded that it indeed was that, but also spiced up with clothes borrowed from the city morgue: “I’m dressed up as a sheep zombie!”

The jokes and puns on mindless herd behaviour were completely lost on Wolford.

Nick was more impressed by Delgato’s flower costume – the tigress having apparently spent quite a bit of effort to somehow paint or color her fur green so her stripes didn’t clash with the flowery head-dress she had on: “That looks like it took a while”

“Nah – my husband used one of the paint spray guns they use at the auto-shop he works at. It’ll wash off with soap, but took just under a minute to put on... and then ten minutes to dry”

Delgato’s husband was apparently off getting some drinks, as was Francine’s hubby – but nobody seemed to notice as the talk of choice of costumes, comments on neat or odd details, kept everyone amused.

For her ’amusement’ Judy brought over a couple of shots of Absolut Gullerod – everyone found Nick’s reaction to the stuff hilarious.

“Oh come on – this stuff has to be the most fake, perfumed booze I’ve ever tasted. Carrots, if you like this stuff, that’s cool, but I’m going to get something else” Nick proclaimed, his lips curled in shock and flavour horror.

Judy giggled and took Nick’s shot for herself, everyone else smiling. Her and Nick’s relationship was an open secret at precinct one, though as far as everyone else other than Nick and Judy knew, then the two had only ‘fallen in love’ after their exposure to N2 two months earlier.

As Nick returned he just barely managed to spot Clawhauser sneak off with someone dressed up as Gazelle – he couldn’t quite see if the mammal dressed as Gazelle was male or female – but he didn’t get much time to ponder that strange observation, for Judy was already wobbly after having downed four shots of that nasty artificially flavoured Absolut Gullerod gutter-hooch. Even the nastiest distilleries in Happytown made better-tasting spirits.

That said, then Nick’s thoughts of booze turned into a shortlived bit of amusement, for Nick found himself subtly tapped on the shoulder by a flowery paw from Delgato: “Did you bring any kit?”

Kit was an informal term for gear on the force, chiefly for use if you didn’t want to straight up ask if a co-worker was armed while out in the public.  
Nick nodded, having only had a single drink so far, leaving him not even buzzed yet: “I have a taser with me – why?”

“Behind you, far wall. At the door to the toilets – a manul cat is selling something to the mice up on the top level” the tigress said, turning to look out towards the inner section of the club so the dealer wouldn’t notice her.

Nick turned around and thrust his tail towards Judy, making it look as if he was just horsing around – while he gazed from in under his mask at the scruffy looking cat near the door to the toilets. Oh yes, that cat was selling something to some mice and pika up on the top level: “Looks like N2 or some other kind of party drugs – those packets are blue, either way that does look like we should bust” 

“You can make out the color of the packets from here?”

Nick didn’t answer, instead he told Delgato to make sure that Judy didn’t wander off: “and don’t let her get close to any of your orange bits... she gets frisky when she gets drunk – and Francine, go warn the bouncers – I don’t want to get kicked out because of this”

The tigress didn’t get a chance to ask or object, for Nick had already stalked off towards the dealer.

Making a beeline towards the nearest bar, which got him fairly close to the door to the toilets, Nick ordered a can of soda. Faking having to pee always looked more convincing when you were drinking something.

Oh, what’s that? A mysterious sensation in my loins, and not the sexy kind? Whelp, time to go pee: “I should get an acting award for this” he thought to himself.  
A banner hanging down the wall was providing some visual cover for the dealer – a fox and a goat acting as look-outs and muscle provided physical cover, with their colourful albeit cheap-looking costumes looking far more eye-catching than the dealer’s black and brown faux-steampunk getup. This was an amature operation, no doubt about that. Or maybe it was just unlike that three dozen cops in civies were there to party that night? Maybe both?

Pretending to send a text message just before going into the bathroom, Nick managed to stall long enough to spot the blue pills being flung up to the top level – and wads of cash being dropped down into the dealer’s stovepipe hat. Talk about creative use of your costume – a fake top in the hat so cash would drop into a hidden compartment? Ok, these jokers had actually put some planning into this.

Going into the bathroom, Nick called up dispatch and told them to send transport for three suspected dealers – and warned them that an impromptu bust was about to happen. The officer on the other end of the call checked off with Nick whether he had witnesses, which he had, his badge? Check. Means to take down the suspects? Taser and nearby backup. That was all it took: Nick had a go-ahead.

Leaving the bathroom, Nick shouted towards his friends, waving to get their attention: “Hey gang, let’s do this! They’re sending two cars for pickup”

To everyone in earshot it sounded as if Nick has just ordered a cab or a Zuber. To Francine, Delgato, Wolford and the rest of the gang, Nick’s message had a slightly different meaning. The dealer and the muscle seemed quite content to ignore the shouting fox – the dealer having better things to do, and the muscle was busy keeping an eye on the bouncers and the doors in and out of the club, to see if any cops or other buzz-kills were showing up.

This also meant that they didn’t really find it that odd when Nick quickly darted over to the dealer and asked: “Hey, got anything for my size?”

“You wanna get high, get fucked or party all night? Pick one, fifty bucks” the manul cat said, not even bothering to look at Nick. What the cat did do, was adjust his cardboard-gear-encrusted monocle.

Nick briefly pondered his options. So the dealer had used the street terms for some kind of euphoric, N2 and amphetamines. It was a fairly regular load-out for a club dealer, at least according to current ZPD statistics. It was all the confirmation Nick needed.

“How about fifteen to twenty years for dealing?” Nick said, straining behind the mask not to smirk too much.

The dealer was quite startled to see the badge, and the cat being barely two thirds of Nick’s height and mass, then Nick was able to grab and pin the cat to the wall very quickly. The dealer’s muscle, equally startled, had two reactions. The goat simply fell over – got to love the goats with paralytic surprise syndrome.

The fox in turn did try to make a run for it, but as he made a beeline towards the lower level Francine tried to nab the fox with her trunk – the fox dodged, scampering under a table and knocking over a drunk beaver. The beaver’s shriek of surprise and the sound of the beaver’s glass shattering on the floor got the attention of the bouncers – and the fox running away from the source of the noise made the bouncers home in on the fox.

Caught between the bouncers and an elephant, a wolf and a tiger coming at her, the vixen surrendered. Of course, with that much commotion the bouncers and moments later the club owner demanded an explanation.

Badges were flashed, explanations were given, and due to the owner’s kind cooperation and PR worries the two incoming cruisers were redirected to arrive at the club’s rear entrance. It made sense: No club officially wanted a reputation for being a place to go and buy drugs – though unofficially, then they probably didn’t mind that much, since enough mammals did go clubbing with the expectations of buying and taking party drugs, that taking a too great public stance against drug use did actually impact their bottom lines negatively. This was known to the police, and much like how it was known that there would always be mammals who would ignore the speed limit when driving, then it was simply another harsh reality that the ZPD tried to either work with or work around.

With the dealer and his muscle off to central booking, Nick returned to the party with a new drink in paw, finding Delgatto blushing enough to shine through her costume makeup: “I told you she gets frisky...”

The next Monday morning, the weekend’s hangovers and Sunday morning sex-a-thon long over, Nick and Judy sat down for the day-shift bullpen briefing.

Like with many bullpen briefings, then it wasn’t uncommon for there to be new faces there. There might be specialists, detectives or officers from other precincts that were visiting or working joint cases. Some detectives might be there to have officers assigned to them, while others could be there because they had work or meetings to do right after with some of the officers – it uncommon to see prosecutors listening in for that reason. Sometimes some of the detectives or analysts from the various departments would be there to present a case they were working on, especially if it was something that all the line officers had to be on the lookout for.

This time around the only new face that Nick noticed was a brown-furred rabbit buck in a very worn but otherwise serviceable ZPD loaner jacket – the sort they would give to mammals that had to work in the field that usually didn’t. The buck had an air of confidence and calm professionalism around himself – this was chiefly something Nick saw through the buck’s calm gaze sweeping the room and sizing up every officer that came in and sat down. Whoever this buck was, then he hadn’t seen any of the officers here before, but he was not the least bit intimidated by them either.

Bogo’s arrival was announced, and both Nick and Judy hooted along as god-emperor buffalo-butt stomped into the bullpen, his scowl looking particularly sour that morning: “Quiet!”

The first order of the day was the weekend’s burglary count. It was not good, but not outside the norm for a full moon. Nearly half the officers in the bullpen were assigned burglary cases to follow up on.

Nick and Judy were not – in fact, towards the end of the bullpen session it was just Nick, Judy and the mystery buck. Well that didn’t look good. Was it time for another lovely day of parking duty?

“Nick, Judy, I have a special task for you” Bogo said, his eyes briefly darting to and from the new buck.

Judy’s ears sprang to attention: “Yes sir – what is it?”

“We have a guest as you might have noticed, courtesy of city hall. He will observe you, but not assist or involve himself in your work, for the next month” Bogo said sternly, sounding very much as if he wasn’t particularly happy about what he had just said.

Nick spun around to have a new look at the buck: “Alright, and who exactly is it that we’ll be baby-sitting? Is he a union rep? Some city councilor’s boy who wants to play cop?”

“Close – I am here to see how you and your partner play cop” the buck said.

That voice.

Nick had heard that voice many times. It had been on TV, it had been in movie theatres – it was... unmistakable.

...and of course Judy got to react first, as Nick as simply stunned in shock and awe.

“Cheese and crackers, you’re Jack Savage!” Judy burst out, jumping up into the air and spinning around.

The buck nodded, and Bogo laid down the law: Nick and Judy were to stay away from anything that might put Mr. Savage in danger, and instead of going on patrol they were to start on the cybercrimes to-do list.

“So... it’s not desk duty, but no fun allowed?” Nick snarked.

Bogo’s brows closed their distance between each other, crashing together like two mountain ranges, piling onto his wrinkled forehead, as his grim gaze shot daggers at the fox: “Yes, but on the plus side you’ll get nothing but day-shift for the duration”

Nick shot Bogo a wide, toothy, shit-eating grin: “Gotcha”, which transitioned to a charming smirk towards Judy. Nick couldn’t help but smile from out under his aviator shades, as Judy all but curled up where she stood in a knot of schoolgirl squee, looking at the actor.

There was a few things to sign first: An NDA from Savage’s Vinewood studio, preventing Nick, Judy and Bogo from leaking anything about this to the press – only them and a few mammals at city hall would know about this. Savage in turn had to sign a few similar documents, because he would likely become privy to ongoing investigations and other such sensitive information.

With all that out of the way, Bogo ushered the trio out of the bullpen – he apparently had a teleconference meeting he had to attend: “And you two, behave yourself: Do not embarrass the force”


	2. Babysitting

It was strange – overwhelming even: Walking down the halls of precinct one with the Jack Savage, the A-list movie star!

Only... come to think of it – he didn’t really look like Jack Savage.

“Don’t you usually have grey fur and those black stripes on your cheeks?” Nick asked quietly, praying to whatever dark gods that might listen that he wasn’t making a terrible mistake by asking.

Judy gave Nick and Savage a look that very much indicated that she had been thinking about the same conundrum.

“It’s a dye-job. Took a dip yesterday – I’ll wash it out when I’m done here, that way the stalkerazzis won’t be able to recognize me or bother us” Savage said, making it sound as if this was not the first time he had done that.

Full body fur-dye? Even for a relatively small mammal like a bunny that was expensive. Wow.

With that little mystery solved, Judy quickly moved on – her boundless enthusiasm compelling her to action: “So, let’s do this! Jack, can I call you Jack? Let’s get down to the motor pool and get going”

Down in the motor pool, Nick and Judy found that their cruiser had already been modified so their front passenger seat could have two small mammals strapped in safely. Well, that would make things a little easier.

With Judy at the wheel, Savage in the middle and Nick on the right, the trio sallied forth from precinct one.

“Awesome – so... what first? Busting drug dealers, uncovering conspiracies? Saving all of Zootopia again like you did with Bellwether?” Savage asked, looking back and forth between Nick and Judy.

Nick couldn’t help but feel that this celebrity movie star suddenly felt a lot less cool, even more so with the giddy looks Judy were sending his way. Jealousy? Nick didn’t want to admit it – but he was self-aware enough to recognize the feeling. He hoped that the feeling would remain unsubstantiated.

“No, sadly not – you heard the chief: We’re on the cybercrime to-do list. I’m sure they have something that needs to be done that’s long overdue” Nick noted, not feeling too enthusiastic.

Savage sighed. He knew that the deal his studio had brokered with city hall had required that he stay well out of danger – but ok... so what was on this cybercrime list? Strapping on VR goggles and hunting hackers in cyberspace?

“Spoken like a true movie actor” Nick quipped, laughing a little. Judy chuckled along as well.

Savage’s ears flopped down upon realizing that his vision of cybercrime policing had been a little too influenced by the stuff he had done in sci-fi movies: “Ok... so what will we doing?”

Nick punched a few things in on the cruiser’s computer, a long list coming up: “No, we have... a few warrants that need to carried out. Here we go: some mammals wanted for TUSKing and attempted TUSKing – let’s do a quick check in with the detectives who have those cases first”

Savage paid close attention as Nick called up the three detectives, asking if any updates to the cases in question hadn’t been put into the system. This was standard protocol. With that they got a go-ahead to carry out the warrants.

“Ok, cool – so... what’s TUSKing?” Savage asked, sounding innocent and curious, obviously unfamiliar with the Tactical Unit for Suppressing Killers and how it was occasionally abused.

Nick and Judy exchanged glances, discussing without words if they should tell him. Judy wanted to, Nick didn’t, but he couldn’t stop her.

“Well Mr. Savage...” Judy began, to which Savage quickly said “Call me Jack, please” while looking very accommodating.

Judy blushed and squee’d a little – and Nick frowned – but Judy then continued: “...ok, Jack, TUSKing is when a mammal calls in a false report in order to trick the police into sending the Tactical Unit for Search and... uhm... something – sending them to bust down someone elses door in and hurt them”

Jack gave Judy a concerned raised eyebrow: “For real? Why would anyone do that?”

“Bullying. Attempted murder – usually the calls say that the targeted mammal is holding children hostage or something like that. Anything to give us an excuse to do a no-knock raid, and go in with flashbangs and shoot first, ask questions later. Vindictive exes, someone who doesn’t like your politics, it can be over anything” Nick elaborated, taking effort to convey with his tone that he found the practice to be exceedingly vile.

Jack looked horrified – and whipped out a notepad to scribble down notes like mad.

“Notes?” Judy asked tentatively.

“Ya are you kidding? TUSKing sounds like something that would look amazing in a movie – I know some script writers. They live for this kind of stuff” Jack said, scribbling.

Passing through an intersection, Judy kept her eyes on the road but still managed to ask: “Ok, but... two things, why not use a voice recorder, and please don’t have your friends write movies that glorify TUSKing – mammals have gotten really hurt from those”

Clicking his pen and putting his notepad away, Jack let out a quick bemused snort: “First, security – can’t hack a notepad. And secondly, no Vinewood writer would ever glorify crime. Only the bad guys do real crime in movies, otherwise a studio can actually get into trouble. But tell me, this TUSKing stuff, who would do that? Why?”

“Well, the first warrant we have is for an impala in Savannah Central, a pro gamer who tried to TUSK an opponent during an online tournament... so it was for financial gain, and to potentially kill off a competitor who she apparently had beef with on social media” Nick said, scrolling through the case file linked to the warrant of their first stop.

Jack was understandably shocked to hear this – but Judy quickly noted that the gamer who had been targeted had actually anticipated deranged fans, haters or competitors trying to TUSK him, so he had talked with the ZPD and warned them that it might happen one day: “Basically he had given proof that he lived alone, was single, and was in the risk group for that kind of stuff, so when someone called something like that in we knew it was fake most likely fake. We basically called the place ahead to see if everything was ok”

“Sounds like something my secretary should look into protecting me again” Jack said, sounding quite enthusiastic for the impending arrest.

The last known address of the mammal that the arrest warrant was for, was at a large mid-scale apartment complex. Block C, second floor. There was plenty of room in the parking lot, and after they printed out the signed warrant via the cruisher’s on-board printer, the three headed towards the door of the building. Moments later three were inside and on the hunt, looking for their perp. 

“Hold on – do you even know if this guy is home?” Jack wondered, as the three quietly waited in the spacious elephant-grade elevator.

Quickly looking at the warrant, then at the case file on her phone: “Ah here it is – the detective found the suspect’s work schedule two months ago. He’s a pro gamer, so he’s on his computer most of the day, so he should be here” 

“Wait, if you’ve known where he lives for two months, why hasn’t he been arrested earlier?” Savage quickly asked, looking concerned.

Nick gestured for Jack to calm down: “Easy – it’s a question of priority. Some crimes require faster response than others. This guy wasn’t going anywhere, and he didn’t actually hurt the other guy. Violent crime, drugs, rape, kidnapping, actual murder, that stuff is focused on more, which means that stuff like this ends up on a to-do list for later. It doesn’t become a priority unless it gets close to the time-limit for prosecution”

The bunny buck didn’t look terribly pleased with the answer, neither did Judy – but it was her who had originally given the same explanation to Nick, so all she could do was shrug: “It’s true – same reason that shoplifting and bike theft doesn’t get the same coverage as organized crime or drug dealing, even if it’s really annoying”  
“Ok, so you put your effort where the biggest problems are – right, that makes sense. Like a studio making movies that will make the most money, to stay afloat, then make the smaller artsy movies to please the critics afterwards” Jack mused, while Judy went over and fiddled with the fusebox.

“Nick, it’s the number fifteen door right?” Judy asked, her paw hovering over a fuse eject button.

Nick nodded, standing ready at the door. Judy pushed the button.

A split second later a shriek of horror sounded from within the apartment, followed soon after by the front door unlocking.

As the door swung open, and a mid-twenties female impala managed to take three stompy steps out of the door before she saw Nick and Judy: “What the...”

“Mira N’Vabudicae, you’re under arrest for the attempted murder of Jenny Ashwood, filing a false police report, and abusing public resources. Everything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. If you can’t afford a lawyer, one will be presented to you” Judy fired off, jumping up in front of the impala.

The impala doe was utterly dumbfounded: “What? Murder of who? What the hell are you talking about?”

“You would know him as ‘EZrekt’ – we have evidence that you tried to give him a TUSKing a while ago, with intent to get him killed in the action” Judy followed up, her tone the epitome of professional composure. Her tone was clear but stern, her words easy to understand, and her demeanour projecting confidence and authority all over.

The impala began to back away, but Nick was already up behind her, blocking the door. Sure, the impala was twice Nick’s height, but he had his taser ready and was shaking his head: “Not happening”

“You’re busted” Judy said with a firm tone of finality in her words, waving a pair of impala-sized cuffs around.

Savage remained silent during the ordeal, hiding behind his own set of expensive sunglasses, taking notes and observing the expressions on Nick, Judy and the impala as they drove back to precinct one and ‘depositet’ the impala in a holding cell. The impala fluctuated between crying, proclaiming her innocence, and being angry – something Jack was later told was very common when arrestees realized that the jig was up.

On their way out again they notified the detective in charge of the case, prompting Jack to ask: “Wait, if there was a detective working the case, why couldn’t he or she have arrested this woman?”

“Because a detective might have a dozen cases to work at any one time – cybercrime even more so, since they get hundreds of reports of online threats that they have to sift through to check if they’re just trash talk, or legit threats that needs police action – again, priorities and limited resources” Nick said as they drove out of the motorpool.

It was clearly written on the buck’s face that he wasn’t quite happy with that explanation – but his mood did improve over the day as they made four similar arrests for various low-level cybercrimes. A couple of suspects weren’t home, one had moved – but the landlord had a forwarding address, and the suspect was picked up at the new address.

“Not bad for a good day’s work – if we can get the rest of the mammals on the list just as fast we’ll be done with this by Thursday” Judy said triumphantly.

Nick nodded, looking at the clock. There wasn’t time for another pickup, so they were heading back to precinct one: “Maybe buffalo-butt will let us go back on regular patrol if we finish it quickly?”

“How many mammals are left on this list? Are they all wanted for TUSKing or hacking?” Jack asked, clicking his pen with anticipation.

Judy threw a quick glance at Jack, then turned her eyes back to the traffic: “No, there are a few mammals wanted for questioning in a few hacking cases – not suspects, just mammals we need a statement from who’ve failed to show up on their own, the rest are mammals in dire need of a stern talking to”

Jack first gave Judy, then Nick, a very questioning look: “A stern talking to?”

“Mammals who send threats to others on the internet – most of them can be stopped just by bringing them in and telling them to stop. If we had to prosecute them all our courts would be flooded in that kind of minor cases” Nick explained, giving Jack the distinct impression that he understood the level of scheduling issues that prosecuting that many online harassers very well.

The actor nodded, taking notes.

“Most of them just get carried away with their shit-talking, but some won’t take a hint, or target certain mammals with the intent of destroying them mentality via their treats – same reason I get my mail at the precinct” Judy said, her off the cuff remark about her mail appearing to catch both the actor and the fox off guard.  
“Hold on – you get threats in the mail?” Savage blurted out.

Nick, opting not to repeat Jack, instead noted: “So that’s why I never saw you change your mailing address when you moved...” – not mentioning that it was in reference to her having moved in with him.

Judy couldn’t help but think that Nick was skirting how close he could get to revealing that they lived together by saying that, but Jack’s question was fair enough: “Jack, I was the cop who busted Bellwether – a lot of the prey-supremacy groups she propped up during her reign did not like me taking away their meal ticket. The precinct mail-room screens them for threats, so I dont’ see any of that anymore”

“Do you know if you still get any hatemail from any of them?” Nick wondered, concerned about this surprise revelation.

Judy said that she hadn’t gotten any reports of anything like that in well over a year – which matched fairly well with the last of the big prey-supremacy organizations closing down.

“Hold on – what Bellwether did was horrible, how could anyone target you busting her?” Jack asked, looking quizzical, with his pen ready for juicy notes and ideas.

“Oh I can think of a few. That lioness we ran into at ZU? Mammals like her, am I right?” Nick pondered, recalling some of the ‘slogans’ that the crazy lioness and her fellow protesters had shouted at Judy when they were hauling off a ram they had arrested two months ago.

Jack’s ears perked up – this sounded really juicy.

“Ya, basically conspiracy nuts who thinks we framed Bellwether – that it’s some kind of predator conspiracy, and me and any other prey mammal on the force are traitors to all prey. Crazy but persistent bunch, love to blame others for their own issues” Judy said, her voice turning sour as the bitter memories resurfaced. Her paws clenched the steering wheel hard.

Jack nearly dropped his pen – a police predator conspiracy? Even he remembered how open and shut the case against Bellwether had been, thanks to Judy’s voice recording: “A predator conspiracy? What?”

“You do realize that while Zootopia is only ten percent predator, then the ZPD is almost forty percent predator?” Nick pointed out, looking at Jack from behind his aviator sunglasses for when the actor would figure out the nature of the conspiracy.

The actor pondered Nick’s statement for a moment, then clicked his pen triumphantly: “Oh I get it – the prey supremacists blame the cops, because there’s so many predators on the force. Damn, and they call you a traitor because of that?”

“Let’s just say that if it wasn’t for Nick becoming my partner, than I would probably have quit by this point – being a cop is hard. You see the worst that Zootopia has to offer every day, and it will wear you down if you don’t have someone to lean on. The hatemail didn’t help with that” Judy mused, craning her neck from side to side, ending it with a heartfelt sigh.

Jack took down notes as quickly as his paws would let him.

“Indeed – plus, it’s not just prey supremacists. You also have the 'zoothers’ who simply refuse to believe that nighthowlers are real. There’s both preds and prey on that front. They hate me for being the spokes-mammal in all those PSAs that came out during and after the trial, when city hall needed to explain what nighthowlers were to the public” Judy added, shaking her head.

Nick chuckled: “And if you really want a laugh, then poke around on prey supremacist forums. They can’t seem to agree on whether they like the zoother idea or not. It’s hilarious to see how they basically rip their own communities apart over stuff like that. Some of them don’t want to consider that prey can be affected by N1, while others think it was simply a means for Bellwether to expose the ‘true nature’ of predators”

“So they can’t agree which makes predators look worst?” Jack said, sounding a little conflicted on whether he could allow himself to express bemusement over that.  
Judy parked the car and turned off the engine: “Mammals who hate rarely have a very logical approach to their hate – they just don’t like something, and questioning that, or trying to make sense of it, usually just makes them look stupid, and they know it. A lot of the hatemail I got, when we could track down who sent it, they never could give a good reason why they had done it... and honestly there never weren’t that many of them, but the few there were, were quite vocal”

“That... reminds me of a few ‘highly opinionated’ producers and directors I know – but seriously, why are there so many predators in the police?” Jack said somewhat hesitantly and asked, as the trio walked towards the elevator out of the motorpool.

Judy looked at Nick, to see if he wanted to try to answer that. He shrugged, so Judy said: “Well – what few studies there’s been made say that predators enjoy the ‘hunt’ a lot more. Tracking down criminals, other mammals. Plus, most prey really do not like the idea of putting themselves in harms way – and being a cop is pretty much all about that, whether it’s verbal abuse, someone trying to punch you for giving them a parking ticket, or a drug dealer with a knife or sharp antlers”

That Jack’s pen didn’t catch fire from all that note-taking amazed Nick.

With Jack gone for the day, Nick and Judy clocked out and hit the showers. When they got home they were finally able to drop their professional facades.  
“Oh my god Nick! We just drove around all day with THE. JACK. SAVAGE! Can you believe it!” Judy exclaimed, catching Nick off guard with the forcefulness of her exuberance.

Stretching his back, Nick shrugged: “I don’t know... I mean I like his movies, but he’s a lot less cool than I thought”

“You mean he doesn’t have a whole movie studio around to make him that much more awesome? I think he’s pretty cool on his own” Judy said, sounding more as if describing a lover than someone she had to ferry around while working.

Nick couldn’t help but feel a tad slighted, and thus chose to speak honestly about it and hip things in the bud: “Carrots – is this something I should feel jealous about? I don’t do love triangles”  
“  
No, oh Nick – I... look, he’s a buck. He’s a rich, famous buck, and I’m a doe in my mid-twenties. I would be lying if part of me wasn’t attracted to me, but that part sits down here” Judy said, patting her hips, drawing in breath to very demonstratively show that she had more to say.

Nick nodded with a smirk: “Go on...”

“Up here, I’m all yours – and you know it” Judy said, putting a paw over her heart and snatching one of Nick’s paws and putting that over hers on the same spot.  
Drawing Judy in for a hug, Nick knelt down: “Do I know that? Of course I do...”

“Just let me indulge a little here – I’ve been a fan of Savage for years! Plus, I don’t complain when you turn your head for a vixen while on patrol” Judy mused, stroking Nick’s tail.

It was difficult for the fox to object – tail stroking was definitely cheating: “Horny bunny”

“Fluffy fox”

The two agreed that their little talk had been good: Airing their worries instead of letting things go bad was always good – though with Jack tagging along while at work it meant that they had to be extra careful about hiding their relationship, or Judy’s meat eating.

“I guess I’ll have to settle with getting meat in my mouth while at home. Speaking of which...” Judy said in a very suggestive tone, zipping down Nick’s pants.

The next day the trio continued working through the cybercrime docket. As Jack had been informed, then a few of the mammals on the list were simply wanted for questioning, but had failed to show up to give a statement on their own. It wasn’t criminal, but refusing to cooperate in a case could result in a fine for obstructing justice – nobody really wanted that – but some mammals had busy work schedules, but Judy was great at talking foremen or restaurant managers into giving their employers a couple of hours to come in and get their interviews done.

Jack remarked that he had never really thought of the amount of ground work that went into building a criminal case behind the scenes: “So.... you interview witnesses before trial? But why then bring them in during trial at all?”

“Well, the prosecutors won’t summon you to the stand if they don’t know for sure that you know something relevant to the case” Judy explained, looking at the GPS for the next address to drive out to.

Nodding, Jack thought about what he had been told the day before: “Say, for all the preds on the force – Chief Bogo is a water buffalo, right?”

“Police Chief is a political appointment – City Hall appoints the police commissioner, who offers the job of chief to senior officers and detectives” Judy quickly pointed out, figuring that that was what Nick wanted to know.

Nodding, the actor asked what was next on the list.

The next three days was spent tracking down mammals all over Zootopia, escorting some of them to precinct one for interviews, tell others to knock cool it with the online death threats, and hauling a few of those screaming and kicking back to a holding cell for assaulting an officer in the few cases where they reacted really poorly.

With the cybercrime list done – at least for all the low risk stuff that Bogo would let them work on – they got another bit of busy-work.

“We’re doing what today?” Jack asked incredulously, sitting between Nick and Judy in the cruiser as they drove through the city.  
Nick sighed: “We’re canvassing all the downtown pawnshops. They have to be reminded regularly, in person, to not accept anything that is obviously stolen – plus this is a good way to collect what they’ve set aside of obviously stolen goods sold to them”

“That sounds unbelievably boring” Savage complained.

Judy nodded, but didn’t say anything outright. Nick shrugged: “A lot of these shops know that they operate in a grey area – a lot of them usually won’t come forward on their own if someone tries to sell them stolen goods, but if we come and ask they can squeal without losing face to their community – they usually say we pressured them into talking if anyone asks”

“Do you?”

“Don’t have to – we can get warrants, shut them down and search the, but that takes time and resources – but we don’t need to do that. The shops know that they’ll get in trouble if we catch them fencing stolen goods on purpose. They just don’t want a reputation for being a place that narks on their costumers” Judy explained, sounding very understanding. No business wanted to be known as the place that gives you up to the police.

Jack took careful notes.

“What exactly are you taking notes on?” Judy asked, having finally grown too curious to hold back – especially since Jack had already filled up half his notebook.  
Putting his notebook away, the buck threw Jack a disarming grin: “Acting and script notes, like I said yesterday – this stuff about pawn shops... it would-“

The radio suddenly burst to life: “Suspected gang fight in an alley near fifth and lemon. Nearby units respond”

Judy quickly looked a Nick. It was so painfully obvious that she wanted to respond. Nick sighed and nodded, knowing that Judy would be miserable after work if she didn’t do it.

“This is One-Ten-Six, we can do this – but Bogo will need to clear it” Judy quickly said into the microphone.

In the tense seconds where they waited for confirmation, Jack kept his eyes trained on the radio but asked Nick: “How do you know that you’re one of the closest teams to this?”

“Dispatch has software for that. They just poke their monitor with where we need to go, and the computer checks all patrol cars’ GPS, then automatically connects the call to the five nearest cruisers” Nick noted.

Just about one additional second passed, before the radio came on again, Bogo’s voice answering: “Go – but keep Jack in the cruiser until the dust has settled, and pull back and call for backup if you can’t handle it”

Judy made with a jubilant outburst, Nick very quickly pushing the button down to mute the microphone.

Driving off, Jack wondered: “Hold on – a gang fighting? We’re only three mammals, what are we going to do?”

“We are two – you don’t count – and gangs tends to scatter when cops show up. They don’t want to be caught, and ideally we just need to catch one of them to learn what was happening, and save anyone being beaten up” Nick quickly corrected.

The actor frowned, looking at the fox with a pout: “So you’re just going to let them get away? What kind of attitude is that?”

“Mr. Savage – Jack – please, remember what we talked about yesterday: We can’t be everywhere, and if a dozen gangbangers each run off in a different direction you would need twenty-four officers. That’s a terrible waste of police resources” Judy tried to explain, putting a reassuring paw on Jack’s shoulder.

Taking a deep breath, Savage appeared to calm down: “Alright... I just, whoa”

Judy had parked outside the alley where the fight had been report. The fight was definitely over, if judging by the ten or so motionless pigs and sheep wearing lying scattered all over the alley, the light rain soaking into their clothes.


	3. Voicing Opinions

“Damn... what happened here?” Jack wondered, looking from behind of Nick and Judy as the three advanced on the alley, as the light rain dripped around them.

The alley itself was painfully generic. Nestled between two three story red brick buildings, just wide enough that you could wheel the dumpsters at the end of the alley in and out, the place smelled faintly of cat piss – the rain hadn’t washed it away entirely – but much more noticeable was the ten pigs and sheep, all of them looking to be late teens or early twenties, all sporting the same black and red do-rags or scarves or armbands. This was the gang – but it was also them who had lost whatever fight there had been, for none of them were moving. The strange thing was that there only black and red gang-colors – no signs of who they had been fighting.

Pushing Jack back a little, Nick and Judy rushed in and checked for vitals and injuries. None of the mammals were critically injured, but from the level of wetness of their clothes then none of them had been lying in the rain for that long – whatever had happened had wrapped up just before the trio had showed up.

“This is One-Ten-Six, we’re at the alley. Fight is over – someone knocked out the whole gang, but there are no signs who, no signs of anyone else having fought here. We need ambulances for a mix of ten adult pigs and sheep” Judy called in.

Jack kept his distance, but tried to shield his notebook while taking notes: “Aren’t you going to arrest them?”

“Arrest them for what? For all we know they were the ones who got attacked” Nick noted, looking quite perplexed at the mammals.

Waiting for the ambulance, Judy pointed out to Jack that if it was another gang that jumped them, then they would quite likely clam up and refuse to press charge or even tell who did it – no gang wanted to be known as snitches – plus doing so would prevent them from getting their own revenge. But at the same time, then there weren’t any signs of them having fought someone else. No gang colors or tags from someone else to mark their victory.

“Now that sounds like gangs – hey, what’s with the marks on this pig?” Jack asked, looking at one of the pig.

The marks were close to the ground – and the unconscious pig was difficult to roll over – but with the three of them working together, they were able to roll the pig over.

Two things became evident the moment they rolled the pig over: The marks were definitely not natural, and secondly the pig was slightly ‘steamy’ on the dry side.

That the pig was steamy confirmed what the two marks were: Taser marks, high-powered taser marks – enough to leave the pig’s skin hot enough to be steamy in the cold rain.

“Well now we have a pretty good idea of how the rest of the these jokers were knocked out” Nick commented, looking around with a puzzled expression – because they still had no clue why this had happened.

To Jack’s surprise, then all Nick and Judy did was tape off the ‘crime scene’ and wait for ambulances and CSIs to show up – he had expected them to investigate a little more...

“We’re patrol officers – not CSIs. We would just end up contaminating this crime scene even more” Judy explained.

After signing the crime scene over to the CSIs, the trio got back into the cruiser and drove off again. There was an email waiting for them on the cruiser’s computer:

“Hey, it’s from one of the cybercrime detectives – he wants to know if we’re available for a milkrun” Nick said, pushing buttons on the cruiser computer.

Jack looked at his watch: “Are we bringing him lunch?”

“No silly, milkrun like in go get him something – what is it Nick?” Judy said, finding Jack’s question really funny.

The actor smiled at Judy, then turned to Nick, looking curious.

Detective Harebrast had written in the email that due to one of the mammals that Nick and Judy had brought in the day before for a witness statement, he had made a breakthrough in one of his on-going cases. What he needed now was someone to pick up and escort a technician from city hall to a company under investigation, and then get the data that the technician would collect back to the detective.

“We’ve got time – and this sounds very low risk” Judy mused, looking at Nick and Jack to check if they agreed.

Nick nodded, while Jack looked a little quizzical: “Sure, but... escorting a technician? Why would someone like that need a police escort to collect data?”

“Usually to make sure that nobody interferes with him, especially if you can’t trust the mammals you’re copying the data from” Nick said, sounding as if he wasn’t quite sure what it was all about, but certain that the escort was warranted.

Picking up the technician at city hall, a mid-forties capybara in a pastel green shirt and blue jeans, the trio drove off. The technician had the warrant with him, along with at tricked out laptop in a carrier bag, and seemed quite happy for the escort: “Finally, Casey Henson, let’s see Pecker bar me entry this time”

“Hi Casey, you’ve had trouble with Pecker before?” Judy wondered, never really having thought of a social media company as something that could do anything worth a police investigation – Pecker was after all the biggest micro-blogging platform in Zootopia.

The capybara cleared his throat and put his laptop carrier bag next to him on the passenger seat: “This will be the third time I’ve tried to execute this warrant – first time we just emailed them and asked for copies of their logs, but what they sent was crap. Second time I showed up in person, but was barred access, and that was yesterday afternoon”

“Wait – Pecker? What are we getting from them?” Jack said, looking surprised.

The capybara snorted: “Hold on – who are you?”

“He’s an observer from city hall, shadowing me and Judy for a couple of weeks – they’re doing some information gathering, he started with us yesterday” Nick quickly said, sounding bored in having to say that – oh sure it was sort of a lie, but sounding disinterested was part of making it sound plausible.

“Lovely, more micro-management. Whelp, as long as you don’t get in our way – now, for your question: It’s for a case we’re building against Pecker for systematic violation of some of their user’s rights to free speech” the technician noted, sounding very offended and miffed.

The unique headquarters of Pecker, with its office building appearing to be a somewhat generic glass tower wrapped in a pair of bright blue steel and glass bird wing, was unmistakable as the cruiser turned into the parking garage under the structure. While looking for a spot to park, Judy asked: “Exactly how do you think they’ve been doing these constitutional violations? I thought the freedom of speech clause in our constitution only applies to the government not being allowed to censor people”

“Goes to show what you know” Casey said, snorting a little: “Six years ago the Social Media Free Speech Act was passed, but this is the first case where we're using it – we had to wait for the ZCC to finish catching up classifying the current big social media companies” the capybara explained, as they passed a large sculpture made too like the logo of Pecker: A woodpecker banging on a radio tower.

Jack’s expression changed into a well trained blank but ‘sufficiently polite’ expression – one he usually put on when at contract negotiation meetings with the studio and his lawyer, all the while the capybara continued explaining: Apparently the act basically set some criteria for defining social media platforms critical for public discourse, and then stated that any such social media platform was not allowed to abridge the freedom of speech of its users, outside of anything that was straight up illegal, unless of course the social media platform put it clearly and directly in their terms of service that they did not allow certain forms of speech – and Pecker had not done so, to the point of them still claiming to be a free speech platform in their advertising.

“And Pecker has been doing that? How?” Judy wondered, finding herself worried since she knew that a lot of her family used Pecker for micro-blogging to brag about the size of the Hopps Harvest, or to post baby pictures.

Everyone got out of the car and headed towards the elevator, while the capybara explained: “Yup – we have ample evidence of Pecker deleting posts and accounts to right wing pundits and bloggers over petty things like name-calling and trashtalk, while leaving left wing bloggers who do the same alone. That’s political censorship, and since Pecker is currently the biggest micro-blogging platform around, then the DA wants to set an example. Ideally it’s to make the other large social media and web platforms reign in their behavior as well, so we don’t have to waste time prosecuting all of them”

Up in the lobby of the company, the four mammals quickly found themselves surrounded by security guards. The guard in charge, a muscle-bound bull said who looked like he both lifted and ate weights: “You, capybara – we told you to beat it!”

“Excuse me, Officer Wilde and Officer Wilde here – we’re here to escort our colleague here to your servers - and yes, we do have a warrant, and you have no right to tell us to leave” Nick quickly said, having put on his most serious game-face underneath his aviator shades.

Judy scowled at the capybara: “You could have told us we’d be greeted like this”

“I thought you had been warned” the capybara said, then defiantly shouting: “I told you I’d be back Siri!” 

Siri Lu Peng, a red panda of average height for her species, founder, CEO and majority stock owner of Pecker, dressed in a bright red business suit that made her look quite fierce, considering that she was just under Nick’s height, came stomping out of another elevator: “God damnit! I told you to get lo- Oh hey officers, what can I do for you?”

With a burst of furious gestures from the red panda, the security guards were dismissed, and the trio + technician were herded into a meeting room along with Ms. Peng.

Nick found the woman’s behaviour delightfully amusing – corporate hustlers were so intriguing to him, and so fun to play with.

As the red panda was about to close the door, Nick put a paw to the door, preventing it from being closed: “That’s enough – we’re not here to lounge in your meeting rooms. Take us to your servers, we have a warrant. If you want to challenge what we find, you can do that after we collect the information”

The red panda forced a very pained smile at the fox. In turn, it took effort from Nick not to break into a wide grin – at least his shades hid most of his bemused gaze. Ms. Peng drew in breath through clenched teeth: “Please, I’ll need our legal counsel to examine that warrant before we can let you act on it”

“Bullshit – it’s the same damn warrant I came with yesterday, and you spent four hours stalling with that excuse” the technician pointed out.

That Ms Peng was able to maintain her forced smile impressed Nick – but Casey was right, which flipped Judy’s justice switch, prompting the bunny to bounce over and open the door, gesturing for Casey to come along.

“Ms. Peng – we both know that you don’t get to stall us when we have a warrant. Come on Casey, let’s go sniffing around for those servers” Judy said sternly.

That Nick and Judy weren’t playing ball was obviously frustrating the CEO – but at the same time she was quick to come around to the reality before her. Basically she started apologizing, profusely so – even if it sounded really hollow and disingenuous – and promising that all of Pecker would of course cooperate fully.

“Just open the door to the main server room and I’ll do the rest” Casey mused, sounding not entirely convinced, as the lot of them stepped out of the elevator to sub-level three.

Ms. Peng walked over to the reinforced vault-looking door marked ‘Server Room Prime’ with a gilded sign, swiped an ID card over a scanner and pressed an intercom button: “Open up!”

“No can do, was warned of that corporate spy from yesterday sniffing around – so we set up a four hour lock-down” buzzed a voice from the intercom.

The face on the red panda twisted into a furious gaze akin to what you would draw in scary picture books for kittens and puppies: “Listen you little shit, I sign you fucking paycheck! You open up right now or I’ll wait here four hours and sodomize you with the printer that’ll squirt out your pink slip!”

“I like her style” Jack commented to Nick, very quietly via a whisper while the CEO raged. Judy simply looked shocked to see what appeared to be a wealthy businesswoman to speak in such a way.

A couple of clicks sounded from inside the door, after which it swung outwards towards the gang.

Casey slipped in the moment there was room for him, while Ms. Peng turned to Nick and Judy, apologizing profusely once more: “It seems that someone in my organization has been feeding both me and my server security with false information. I sincerely hope that we can avoid any official investigation on this – I assure you: I’ll helm the internal investigation into this personally, and I will destroy whoever tried to pull this!”

The red panda’s fury, mixed with her desperate plea to avoid any kind of police investigation, came off as rather amusing, but also refreshingly honest. Judy pondered the legalities, but Nick – figuring that nothing productive would really come from wasting time investigating all of that – simply shrugged: “Officially that’s not our call, but I doubt anything will happen. We have bigger fish to fry”

Ms. Peng nodded, asking into the exact nature of what the capybara was looking for. Once Judy was done explaining what they were looking for, the red panda looked ready to blow a gasket.

“Now now – don’t go firing anyone just yet. Please let us do our investigation first. Everyone is innocent until a court has proven otherwise” Judy urged, knowing from previous experience that if any guilty parties got fired this early in an investigation then they might simply disappear, making prosecution impossible, plus it could really bias a jury.

Casey came out of the server vault a few moments later, having gotten his admin-logs and whatnot, looking pleased as punch.

As they drove out of the parking lot, Jack whipped out his notepad and took several pages worth of notes.

“Well that was interesting” Casey mused, padding his laptop carrier bag.

Judy didn’t sound entirely convinced that it had been ‘interesting’ at all: “How? From the way that panda lady sounded, then it’s probably some middle manager in the company who went rogue”

“Maybe – but it’s the company as a whole that will be held responsible if they’re found guilty, just like a construction company that screws up on safety regulations – that’s why Judy told Peng not to fire anyone. They should first be fired after we make our case” the technician explained.

Dropping Casey off at precinct one, the trio sallied forth again. Their first stop was getting lunch somewhere.

After lunch the trio resumed working through their list of pawn shops – by no means terribly interesting work, but Jack had come around to understand that it was a necessity.

While driving to the second to last pawn shop on the list, the cruiser’s radio came to life with a call for backup to some armed drug dealers on the run from another patrol in the canal district.

Judy reached for the microphone, but Nick reigned her in: “Carrots, Bogo’s orders – armed dealers are off the list”

Both Judy and Jack shot Nick a pouty look, making Nick wonder if they had somehow coordinated that reaction in advance.

Jack then turned to Judy and put a friendly paw on her shoulder: “It’s ok – my manager would kill me if I got hurt doing anything risky like that”

“That sounds a little counterproductive” Judy said with a smile.

The actor shrugged, his paw going down her right arm: “I know – but my studio would stand to lose a lot of money if I got hurt in a way so I couldn’t act, but tell you what: Let me make it up to you. Next Friday after work, how about the two of us go somewhere? I know a very nice restaurant tha-“

Judy had put a digit to Jack’s mouth: “I’m flattered, and a big fan of your work, really – and I know that I have some hundred and twenty sisters back home who would each kill me three times over for turning you down – but you’re not my type, plus I don’t think you’d be comfortable dating me if you knew how often I almost get killed while on the job”

With Jack looking at Judy, it was difficult for Nick to get a read on the rabbit buck, but Jack’s reply confirmed his suspicions: “I’m not the first buck you’ve shot down with that speech, am I?”

“Nope” Judy succinctly noted, smiling politely while trying to avoid Nick’s satisfied gaze

A few seconds of uncomfortable silence followed, Nick breaking it with an intentionally lewd comment: “Ya, carrots would much rather bust drug dealers than bust out litters – she’s married to her job”

Jack chuckled a bit, while Judy scowled a bit at Nick, though she did also nod ever so slightly – because it was true, even if it was also was a fairly rude way of explaining things.

“Say, drug dealers – caught any of those recently? Vinewood’s party scene is all buzzing about this new N2 stuff – and I don’t mean the knocked out jokers we found earlier” the actor wondered, sounding just a little too familiar with this ‘party scene’.

Judy’s disapproving gaze switched to Jack, then back to the road: “You do realize that admitting to drug use to us could open you up to an investigation?”

“Of course – never said I did drugs. I had my wild partying days almost a decade ago, back when I had my breakthrough and started earning money. That’s when most of the actors in Vinewood experiment with drugs, when they’re in the mid-twenties, just earned their first ten million and have no idea what to with all that money other than party hard and do stupid things” Jack noted, reminding Nick and Judy that he had been in the movie for quite a while.

Nodding, both as casual understanding of the behaviour Jack described with newly rich twenty-somethings, but also in consent to talking about their most recent drug related busts, Nick regaled about the dealer they had busted at the Howloween party – leaving out that him and Judy had gone there together for the party, instead making it sound as if they had been there undercover.

“Awesome – but seriously, is it true that N2 will make you fall in love if you take too much of it?” Jack wondered, coming off as if he had heard the news stories, but wasn’t sure if he believed them.

Judy laughed: “Oh it can, it definitely can – but not if you’re given the nighthowler cure before you wake up. I mean, it was developed with the idea that both parties have to take it, have sex and then sleep together so they fall in love with each other. We know a professor who’s researched the stuff as part of the original criminal investigation into the stuff. He suspects that it’s your partner’s scent you imprint on or something like that, but nobody will let him test that, because... well... you know, ethics”

The three agreed that N2 was bad news – Jack adding: “That was actually why I asked you out: My manager has gotten really paranoid about the idea of gold-digging does and other crazy fans trying to use it on me. Figured you’d be the last sort who’d try that. A lot of Vinewood celebs have gotten paranoid about that stuff"

“Not a bad idea – though the real danger right now with N2 is that you can’t really tell if any N1 has been mixed in, and most of the ‘home growers’ that try to make it, end up with N1 in the mix – every weekend we get a call about someone having been savaged by their lover over bad N2” Judy remarked, strangling the steering wheel in frustration as she said it.

Wrapping up their pawnshop list, the trio returned to precinct one.

The second Nick and Judy got home and had the door closed Judy tackled Nick, glaring down on him with hungry eyes as he looked up from the floor.

“Oww, what gives?” Nick asked, not really sure if he liked the hungry look in her eyes – it wasn’t the same predatory gaze he knew from her when they were chasing criminals.

Judy began to hastily, but also methodically, to unbutton Nick’s shirt: “Not one hour ago I turned down the most eligible bachelor buck in Zootopia – for you, no less...”

“Ok... sorry to be an inconvenience?” Nick said, trying to give Judy an apologetic smile, but it quickly became clear that that wasn’t what she had wanted.

With a twirl, Judy stripped herself down: “Nick, darling, I’m going to need you to pleasure me until I don’t regret that choice – right now”

The next day in the bullpen Bogo couldn’t help but notice that Nick failed to make even the tiniest of joke or remark during his morning briefing. Indeed, the fox looked tired: “Well then Officer Wilde, perhaps you’d like to know that we have an update on the dealers you found yesterday”

Perking up, Nick nodded, nursing his cup of joe: “Do tell boss”

Behind his stern gaze Bogo found himself disappointed that Nick hadn’t even tried to crack at joke – it always livened up the day shift briefing, even if he pretended to disapprove of it: “We got reports in from precinct two, six and eight – similar cases the last couple of weeks. We now suspect that we’re dealing with a single well-armed vigilante targeting drug dealing gangs”

Judy was just about to say something enthusiastically, to volunteer to go after the vigilante, but then she remembered that her and Nick still had to babysit Jack – so no chasing after armed and dangerous vigilantes – and thus her enthusiastic outburst turned into an adorable little annoyed grunt.

As Bogo handed out assignments for the day, Nick and Judy knowing full well that they weren’t going to get anything, because they already had something on their plate, a call came in. Just as the last assignment had been made, leaving Nick and Judy as the last officers in the bullpen, Bogo got a call on his cellphone.

Whatever it was being said to the bull, then it displeased him greatly: “You have got to be kidding! I told you never to pull that crap on me again! I need forty-eight hours of advanced warning for this kind of event! No you don't - you'll get a pair, but pull this again and I'll take this to the Mayor!”

A bit more shouting from Bogo into the phone followed, Nick’s bemused gaze tracking the cape buffalo’s increasingly red face, because Nick knew that once Bogo reached his peak he would usually fizzle out.

Taking a deep breath, Bogo composed himself, then eyeball’d at Nick and Judy with a look that could kill: “Hopps, Wilde, overtime – seven o’ clock at ZU. They need two officers for extra security to a guest speaker”

Judy, ever the dutiful bunny, nodded. Nick had more of a quizzical expression: “But we’re on babysitting duty sir – do we bring him along?”

“If he wants to – Clawhauser will have the contact information to the mammals arranging the event” Bogo replied, looking none too pleased to have to fit several hours of overtime into the monthly budget. 

Indeed, Clawhauser had the information... but he was not happy to give it the duo: “Oh no, does that mean you’ll have to listen to that bigot? That’s horrible”

“I do believe I beg your pardon – Bogo hasn’t even told us who we’re doing security for” Nick pointed out.

Clawhauser forwarded Nick and Judy the email from the ZU event organizers. Apparently the speaker was named Xander Ferrotesticulous. Mid-donut, Clawhauser explained with a pained expression: “He’s against the laws that secure legalization of gay marriage and all kinds of junk – no wonder he needs security. What he reakky needs is some sense knocked into him”

Nick perked an eyebrow – a homophobic bigot speaking at ZU? Oh yes, that was going to be fun – not.

As the duo walked to the motorpool, Judy added a little detail to the Feerotesticulous thing: “He’s not homophobic – he’s gay”

“Who? Clawhauser? Doesn’t surprise me” Nick said with a smirk.

Judy chuckled: “No silly, Clawhauser was with that serval girl dressed like Gazelle for a date at the Howloween party – no I meant Xander, the snowleopard”

The somewhat quizzical look of disbelief from Nick, aimed at Judy, quickly fizzled as Judy explained: “Xander is against any kind of legislation on who can marry who – gay, interspecies, anything – if clawhauser thinks that makes him homophobic... I don’t think he’s actually listened to any of Xander’s podcasts”

“I take it you have?”

Judy nodded: “Listened to a little of everything while I waited for you to finish the academy and join the force – had some long stints of desk duty back then”

A text from Jack trickled in just as the duo drove out of the motor pool, with an address to pick him up at. With nothing specific on their to-do list, the three patrolled the city, spending a relatively uneventful day doing the rounds, since they couldn’t respond to anything dangerous.

While enjoying lunch, which was picked up at a sandwich deli that Jack had recommended, Judy offered Jack the opportunity to come along for the security gig later that night.

The shower of lettuce and shredded cabbage that Jack spat out upon hearing the name of Xander Ferrotesticulous, was quite impressive: “Oh hell no – he’s on my manager’s no-see list, I can’t come with you there”

“No-see list?” Judy asked, looking sorrowfully at the really great sandwich Jack had scattered on the ground.

Apparently Savage’s manager had a list of controversial mammals that Jack wasn’t allowed to be seen anywhere near – and this snow leopard was on that list. Nick wasn’t really sure what to think: Judy seemed to think that the guy was ok, but between Jack and Clawhauser’s reactions, then he found himself unsure if he should be curious or apprehensive for the event.

Later that day, after Savage had been dropped off and the duo had gotten dinner, they drove out to ZU.

The email from the event coordinator, a student in the ZU conservative student club – another red flag as far as Nick was concerned – had instructed them to show up half an hour before the event was to start, so there would be time to square things off with ZU security and the event coordinator.

Arriving at ZU, the duo headed to the Wellington auditorium, as instructed in the email. Outside they found a large crowd of students peacefully waiting to get in, and a small group of about three dozen student picketers protesting the event. The event-goers and the picketers were separated by simple metal barriers, the same type one would see at hoofball events or other events where you needed a quick setup to make mammals stand in line properly. It looked very prim and proper, with no real need for any extra security.

At the door stood a churlish and bored looking boar in ZU security guard uniform, who waved the duo over. An event coordinator in the form of a young female camel, greeted Nick and Judy: “Thank you for coming – we were afraid that the administration would shut us down if you didn’t come”

Apparently the ZU administration had demanded that the event organizers paid an extra seven thousand, only forty-eight hours before the event was to start, to pay for two police officers to beef up security. The camel was quite miffed: “I mean, look at this! There’s barely thirty morons with signs, and they’re not doing anything – the only reason we got that extra bill thrown in our faces was because the tools in admin wanted to shut us down and deplatform Xander. We were only able to get the money and pay up last night”

Nick found himself nodding: “Well, Chief Bogo certainly wasn’t happy getting the call this morning that he had to find two officers to overtime for this on that short notice, and said that he'd complain to City Hall if ZU pulled something like that again without giving him notice”

Please to hear that the police was sympathetic to their plight, the boar guard noted that they had everything under control outside, to which the camel organizer asked Nick and Judy to come inside and check out a map of the building: “Ok, so now that you’re here, we might as well put you to good use: If you can stand here and here in the auditorium, and remove anyone when they try to disrupt the event, that would be awesome”

“Are you expecting trouble?” Nick wondered, not liking how certain the camel girl had been in saying when, not if, someone would try to disrupt the event.

The camel girl shrugged, her hump shifting just a little too much to the left for her dress to keep up: “Well, oh oops – there we go – no, not trouble, but we all know that Xander loves to court controversy. Think political rally with opposition mammals shouting at the speaker, but this is a private event. We paid for permission to use the auditorium, and we paid for you two – we expect you to keep the peace so Xander can speak his mind freely”

“Fair enough, but tell me, how many mammals is the auditorium rated for? There are lot of mammals waiting to get inside” Judy asked.

“Five hundred, but we’re pretty sure there’ll be more outside. Students are still showing up – but they’ll just stick around, party, and watch the livestream on their phones. Now, this is where I want you to be, we’ll get some chairs over for you” 

Positioning themselves where the camel girl instructed, Nick and Judy settled in and waited for the event to begin.

“Check check, can you hear me?” Judy asked over her radio.

Nick responded: “Yes. You in position fluff?”

Judy confirmed, asking if Nick was seeing anyone suspicious. Nick couldn’t say that he did: “But it’s a bit difficult – these are all college students. I can’t tell if they’re frowning or pouty over bad grades, trouble with their boyfriends, or because they don’t like this Xander guy...”

“Wonderful – also, Carrots, did you see the students guarding all the fire alarms on the way in here?” Nick wondered.

Judy again confirmed, noting that a number of Xander’s previous speaking engagements had been disrupted by his critics having pulled the fire alarms.

“Why am I getting the feeling that only two officers for this is not enough?” Nick replied, finding himself less and less amused.

Judy’s voice rattled through on the radio: “I saw at least twenty ZU security guards outside – if they hold down the fort out there, we’ll be fine”

Twenty minutes later, when the event began, there were first a few instructions and comments from the event organizers, along with a polite reminder to save any questions for the Q&A at the end of the event.

Once the organizers left the podium on the stage the music began – and Nick suddenly found himself wondering if the event would involve male strippers, because the music sounded as if lifted was from ladies night at a strip joint – something he knew from having picked up Finnick after work in one more than once.  
That was when the lights were dimmed, the disco ball lit up, and the hidden fog machines produced a thick mist along the centre aisle. The crowd instantly switched into a highly anticipatory buzz of murmurs and hoots.

“Ladies and gentlemammals, tonight, for his twenty-sixth stop on his Dangerous Furfag tour, returning to us after having been away for far too long, the notorious, the fabulous, the scandalous... oh you know who it is! He danced on the prairies with the buffalo, and they named ‘Sleeps with Horses’, he looks better in women’s clothes than you or your girlfriend does, the one, the only, Xander Ferrotesticulous!” a student announcer enthusiastically rang out over the speaker system.

The crowd erupted in cheers as a snow leopard with his mane bleached and dyed platinum blonde, wearing expensive looking but tasteful jewellery and designer clothes, sauntered down the center aisle, looking about as flamboyant and sassy as it was possible.

Nick wondered if Judy liked the snow leopard for his fashion sense? It certainly seemed impeccable, and the cat was carrying himself with the utmost of confidence while just oozing charisma – no wonder that the students loved him.

Xander sauntered up to the stage and began addressing the audience. The crowd cheered, for the most part. Nick spotted about half a dozen mammals spread around the audience who sat silently, some frowning. Potential trouble-makers? Or were they just busy recording him with their smartphones?

The snow leopard opened his talk by listing off the latest list of things that his haters have accused him of, debunking each point with snarky remarks and a lot of “Darling, that wasn’t what I said and you all know it, because there is video of it online”

It all seemed rather silly, like listening to a pundit or politician trying to debunk random slander.

“Carrots, remind me again – why on Earth is this guy so popular with these kids to begin with? This guy is just a sassy gay political pundit” Nick asked over his radio.

A few seconds passed, the audience once again cheering for something snarky Xander said. Nick figured that the snow leopard would do well if he got work as a stand up comedian.

“He was a tech journalist. He got big about a short while after you went to the academy – there was a big email leak from Bellwether’s administration as it was being dismantled, and he was one of the first to really dig into that, and got really popular with students and teens because... well you can see his style – he’s very anti-establishment. He started touring with it about a year ago, never stopped” Judy explained.

Xander had moved on to talking about the mammals that wrote hit pieces on him, ripping into them, to roaring laughter from the audience.

“And this sad specimen, Alexandra Lee. She is a ‘writer’ for Fluff-feed” Xander declared mockingly, gesturing up towards his slides which now featured the image of some white-tail deer doe Nick had never seen before. The audience boo’d and hissed. Nick had no clue who the doe was.

The snow leopard smirked, flicking his tail: “Oh, don’t hate on her. She is simply a sad product of her environment. She’s angry at me for telling young men to be critical with the women they date, because she’s heading towards the late end of her thirties and simply isn’t attractive anymore. She is living proof that birth control does more harm than good”

Nick’s lip curled up in disgust: “Carrots, please tell me you only like this guy ironically...”

Xander continued with his catty remarks on the tabloid writer, much to the audience’s amusement.

“Just give him a second, you’ll see” Judy radio’d back, confusing Nick endlessly – because he recognized her tone as a very confident and honest one.

Girding his loins with patience, and resting his back by sitting down on the chair that the organizers had supplied, Nick waited patiently for the snow leopard to start making sense.

“...but honestly, what else would you expect from someone who panders to emotions instead of facts? Feel-good puff pieces about how great it is to be fat and feisty, instead of writing about the legit dangers of obesity? No, let’s get some facts on the table, the sort that makes these idiots cry and flail around like kittens without a pacifier” Xander declared, basking in both the sound of his voice and the adoration of the crowd.

Nick sighed, not particularly impressed. The slides changed away from the large picture white tail deer doe, showing a series of graphs and charts.

“Our darling dunce would blame gaming and dude-bros culture on her inability to get a boyfriend she can hold on to, but aside from the fact that’s she’s a venomous harpy, then she has probably had too sex. Oh I know, as if that’s possible, but it is! At least if you’re a girl looking for a husband. Studies have shown that after a woman has had her twentieth boyfriend, her chances of ever finding a permanent mate is down to twenty percent, if not less. I mean, honestly, if you’re that picky you’ll never find the right one – but these women, they’re constantly told by writers like our doe-eyed dimwit here that they can always get someone who’s sexier, richer and willing to throw even more money at them. I’m here to warn you girls: No you can’t, and it’s a bad strategy” the snow leopard explained, going through a couple of more slides that appeared to be citing some actually legit studies on dating habits and marriage statistics.

The flamboyant master of sass continued: “You need to understand: In the dating scene, only the top twenty percent of the sexiest and most confident males of a given species end up sleeping with eighty percent of the females – facts darling – but that also means that those top twenty males don’t hold on to those female very much: There is always a sexier, kinkier and more frisky lady in the club somewhere, and you’re last weeks clingy shag. The problem is that these ladies always think, because that’s what these moronic magazines and lady-bloggers tell them, that they’ll be the one who’ll be able to hold on their dream dates and tame them”

Nick perked an eyebrow. This was something he could recognize – because back in his twenties he had been in that top twenty bracket, at least for short periods, so he recognized the rough numbers Xander was throwing around. Oh those had been the days… a new ‘girlfriend’ every week, along with another blocked number on his cellphone from the latest weeping ex. Good times.

“...and honestly, some of the things that you can read about these ladies doing are just terrible. Do any of you know how many positive pregnancy tests are currently available for purchase on fleabay?” The snow leopard asked, his sassy tone fading to an ominous and foreboding one.

Someone in the audience shouted four-hundred-something. Nick shuddered, recalling the ‘domestic disturbance’ him and Judy had responded to a month or ago, where a very angry goat buck had been in the processing beating the crap out of his ex-wife, after learning that he had spent the last fourteen years paying child support for a son that wasn’t his. Nick recognized that Xander’s point that only mothers ever truly knew who their children were, while it was considered extremely rude and a breach of trust for fathers to insist on a paternity test, which was effectively a nasty but politically correct double standard.

Nick also found himself considering that he knew at least half a dozen vixens who would probably lose their child support payments if their baby daddies ever got paternity tests done.

“But alas, as Alexandra has written, then asking for paternity tests is tantamount to an act of heresy against female-kind, something that moral inquisitors like her and the rest of the single thirty and forty-something lady writers at Fluff-feed diligently work to stamp out, publicly damning anyone who blasphemes against their holy cause” Xander bemoaned melodramatically, his words dripping with satire.

Suddenly a young female reindeer stood up from her seat and shouted: “Screw you, you’re full of shit!” 

Nick quickly zeroed in on the heckler, giving her a second or two to see if she would calm down on her own.

That was when the two ladies sitting next to the caribou, a horse and a cow, got up as well, armed with whistles and airhorns. The noise that ensued was, while not deafening, more than enough for Nick to try to radio Judy: “Let’s go”


	4. Madness Encouraged

Making his way through the audience towards the three women, Nick found that the audience members around him quickly began to cheer him on and scoot up in to their seats, so Nick could get through easier.

At the source of the noise, two of the ladies going whole hog with their air horns, while the caribou lady was shouting: “Down with hate-speech!” over and over, Nick found Judy already trying to talk the cow on the caribou’s right into stopping. It wasn’t really working.

Oh well, time to read them the riot act.

“Ladies, this is a private event – stop this right now or its out” Nick tried to say, but the air-horn wielded by the horse mare was so loud at the close range, that Nick couldn’t even hear himself.

The mare, being several times Nick’s height and bulk, did not appear interested in talking, to which end Nick drew his taser and dialed it up to equine. A quick jump up, followed by a zap to the wrist, made the mare drop her air-horn, which Nick caught and quickly tossed away under the seats.

The response from the mare was swift, her grabbing the fox by his shirt, lifting him up to her face and screaming “That’s assault!” while drawing a clenched hoof up to punch him.

“No, you grabbing and holding me up like this is, especially if you punch me – and it will look amazing on your criminal record. I’m sure all your future employers will love it” Nick noted.

The other airhorn died down, the two other ladies noticing what was happening with Nick and the mare.

“Come on – time to go!” Judy said angrily, knocking the airhorn out of the cow’s grip while the cow was distracted.

With no airhorns, two non-plussed police officers glaring at them, the three ladies picked up their bags and shuffled away from their seats. The snow leopard triumphantly declared: “And that, ladies and gentlemammals, is the current state of my critics. No real counter-arguments, just noise and pathetic attempts at trying to prevent me speaking to you. Let’s give our two emissaries from Zootopia’s finest a round of applause, shall we?”

The whole auditorium erupted in cheers as Nick and Judy escorted the three female students up the aisle towards the main exit of the auditorium. The three ladies weren’t exactly happy about this, shouting stuff back at Xander: “Screw you sexist woman-hater!” “Rape-apologist!”

“Oh hold on – one of them is a horse mare? Well that explains everything!” Xander declared with a bemused tone: “...I probably stole her boyfriend, at some point anyway, I’m more in a zebra phase right now”

The whole auditorium erupted with laughter again, making even Nick smirk a little.

Outside the auditorium, in a large hallway connecting to the main front lobby of the building, Nick and Judy looked around. Their idea was to hand the three ladies over to the ZU security, so they could get back to the auditorium quickly, in case anyone else tried anything while they were gone.

...but there were no ZU security guards to be found.

“Carrots, can you hear anyone other than us in here?” Nick asked, not wanting to sound concerned in front of the three students they were escorting.

The rabbit officer swivelled her ears around for a bit, trying to get a read on the building: No, nothing – but they did say that they would be making sure that nobody got in once the event started. Maybe they’re out in front, where all the mammals there weren’t room for are – to make sure they don’t just flood in?”

“Makes sense – let’s let our three geniuses out there” Nick suggested, wondering what the snow leopard was talking about at that moment. At least the three female students weren’t putting up any kind of resistance, maybe because of the way Judy was spinning a set of cuffs around as she walked next to them. 

Approaching the front lobby, Nick and Judy found no ZU security guards – but they could see a lot of mammals outside in the street lights, the as the evening darkness carved a strong silhouette around them, but most of them were facing away from the building? Ok... also the doors were locked, but it was easy enough to open them from the inside.

Checking that the doors wouldn’t lock them out when closed, Nick and Judy ushered the three out – but that was when they saw it... the flickering shadows illuminated by burning fires, revealing the commotion: The mammals in front of them, in front of the building, were fighting! The brick that bounced off the reinforced front window was also a bit of a dead give-away.

Rushing out to see what was going on, the duo found a grim scene unfolding under the campus street lights in front of the audiotorium building: The mob of mammals in front of the auditorium were fending off a smaller, but evidently far better armed, group of about four or five dozen masked and black clad mammals who were throwing rocks and other things at the mammals defending the entrance.

Judy was about to leap into action against the black clad mammals, but Nick managed to catch mid-leap: “Judy, no – we can’t take on that many mammals – we need backup!”

Spinning around and giving Nick an angry look, Judy’s expression quickly faded into a more understanding look of frustration and anger: “Right, sorry – I just... where the hell are the security guards?”

“No idea – you call this in, I’ll go ask someone in our little defensive phalanx how this started” Nick said, confusing Judy just a bit.

Judy shook off her confusion and took a firm grip on her radio: “This is One-Ten-Six, outside the Wellington auditorium in ZU – there is a small riot here, we need backup. Four or five dozen black clad and masked mammals are trying to force their way into the building, and about three times that many students are protecting the entrance. We need ambulances for all sizes and riot-geared officers, now!”

Counting the painful seconds before she got a response, Judy saw Nick talk to a couple of the students at the back of the defensive formation that had encircled the front entrance. Rocks were flying overhead, and the reinforced front windows of the building already had dents and cracks in them, just not near the door that she and Nick had come out of.

Looking around for Nick among the long shadows cast by the scattered bonfires made of broken protest signs and random bits of wood, Judy spotted him fiddling around with three students who were holding out their smartphones, passing a memory card around. Gathering evidence already? Well it would make sense that someone would have video of what had happened, or how this riot had gotten started.

A loud bang and a shriek from the defensive line alerted Judy to the fact that the black clad mammals were using explosive fireworks as weapons – oh she would just love to dive in, taser blazing. It killed her not being able to do anything, but Nick had been right: There were simply too many to safely do anything.

“Officer Hopps, you there?” her radio burst, the voice from dispatch coming through.

Gripping her radio with rushed urgency, Judy responded: “Yes – when is our backup coming”

“It’s not – go shut down the event inside the auditorium and get everyone in there out safely, away from the riot” the voice said in a direct and officious tone.

“Bu... mammals are getting hurt out there! It’s our duty to-“ Judy began, only to be cut of: “That’s an order – take it up with Bogo in the morning if you don’t like it. I’m just relaying orders here”

Judy had no idea who it was she was talking to – but oh boy did she thump her feet at lightning speed in anger: “Who the hell gave this order??”

There was no reply.

Nick came back, evidence galore: “Hey carrots, I have footage of the rioters arriving – the students say they showed up about twenty minutes ago, just after all the security guards left. I have raw video of all of... hold on what’s wrong?”

“We’re not getting any backup – we need to go back in and shut down the event” Judy said, sounding thoroughly defeated as she saw a beaver student get hit with rock on the arm.

Nick didn’t really know what to say, but followed Judy as they headed back inside and locked the door behind them.

Hurrying back to the auditorium, Nick and Judy rushed the stage, Judy jumping up on the podium and grabbing the microphone away from the snow leopard: “Sorry – but there’s a riot outside at the front of the building, and we have no idea how long Xander’s fans will be able to hold them back. We need everyone to get up and calmly exit through the rear exits, away from the front of the building”

The snow leopard looked at the bunny, for a split second in disbelief, but that quickly turned into resigned frustration: “Right – can’t say that’s unexpected, but a riot, really?”

“Trust me, I’m a fan – I wouldn’t want to shut you down unless I had to – but if they swarm this place, we won’t be able to protect you, and backup won’t be able to get here in time” Judy admitted, looking none too pleased, but opting not to mention anything about the denial of backup.

Arching his back and shaking his head as only a cat could do, Xander gestured for his entourage to pack up.

The exodus from the auditorium proceeded fairly peacefully, though Nick and Judy did learn from the organizers that they had known of the fighting outside much earlier – that they had kept this a secret didn’t exactly please the duo, but they understood why: “You would just have shut Xander down sooner if you knew...”

“And what would you have done if we had first learned of it when they busted in here and started throwing rocks and shooting fireworks at everyone?” Nick asked, the camel looking very much aware that she might be in trouble.

As part of the last three mammals to leave, the camel locking the doors as they left, the duo made their way to their car. The thought of taking the cruiser around to the riot to get in the middle of it all was floated, but they had their orders.

“Why would Bogo stand down from something like this?” Nick asked, sounding very disappointed.

Judy shrugged, feeling roughly as rotten as the many times she had driven away from domestic dispute responses because the battered mammal had refused to press charges: “It wasn’t Bogo – it was whoever has the radio during the evening shift, but he did tell me to take it up with Bogo if I wanted to complain”

“Well then we’ll have to do that” Nick noted.

Nodding, Judy sighed: “Agreed, I can-“ but Nick had put a clawed digit on her lips: “Hold on, Bogo leaves at five – are you saying that he had left orders for response to the riot? How could he have known there would be one?”

The duo shared a very concerned look with each other. This felt shady as fuck.

The next day, Nick and Judy sat with scowls ready as Bogo entered the bullpen for the morning briefing. This did not go un-noticed, especially since Nick and Judy had talked with the rest of the day-shift before Bogo had arrived, effectively riling everyone up.

“I sense that there is some discontent in the ranks” the cape buffalo said in a dry tone, his judging gaze sweeping the room.

Judy was about to stand up and express her opinion when Bogo fixed his gaze on her: “Sit down”

Pushing a button to start the morning briefing’s slides, Bogo brought up an email: “Yesterday afternoon I got a message from the ZBI – they had found chatter on social media indicating that a group of militant protestors, or something similar, were planning on attacking the speaking even that officer Hopps and Wilde had been sent to provide additional security to. The information from the briefing that followed, which I am about to tell you about, does not leave this room unless I permit it, do I make myself clear?”

The bullpen erupted in murmurs, but everyone nodded.

“In a conference call between the ZBI, myself and city hall I was briefed on the situation. These lunatics were looking to make a name for themselves and strike at what they think was one of the great corruptors of Zootopia’s youth, one Xander Ferrotesticulous – however, they were also there to provoke a reaction from us and give them an excuse to set up their own protest events later on” Bogo stated, sounding very much as if he was describing the actions of a criminal organization.

“Hold on – an excuse for what? More rioting in the future?” Officer Trunkaby asked, looking and sounding concerned.

Nodding, Bogo gestured for her to calm down: “I was getting to that Francine. The ZBI’s analysts were certain that what these criminals wanted was a confrontation with the ZPD, so they could record and doctor footage for mass and social media. Hopps, you remember the briefing you got last year about that weirdo lioness you were told to avoid future confrontations with? She was part of this riot, same MO. If these idiots could convince the public that any kind of police brutality had taken place in breaking up the riot - and let’s not kid ourselves, any police take-down of a rioting mammal is bound to look bad on us if whoever with the camera wants it to – then they would have an excuse to set up their own protests and similar events, to protest against us, all of which would have an large chance of turning into a riot”

This time there weren’t any murmurs in the bullpen – just angry expressions, but this time they weren’t aimed at Bogo, as much as they were directed at the mammals who would intentionally try to make the ZPD look bad.

“The ZBI said that this group is only about fifty mammals, but they’re all political extremists. The ZBI is handling the case, using footage taken by the mammals who fought with the anarchists, to identify the aggressors and then quietly arrest and charge them” Bogo continued.

Nick shot a paw into the air, gesturing for Bogo’s attention. The cape buffalo nodded, Nick clearing his throat: “Sir, they were wearing disguises... or uniform – well, both – all black clothes, black masks, like ski-masks or balaclavas – identifying anyone from video footage alone will be pretty much impossible”

“I’m well aware of that, and so was city hall – and neither of us are happy about it. However, in weighing the costs and benefits, we still decided on this course of action. Giving these extremists an excuse to hold their own events will only lead to more riots in the future – they wanted a confrontation with us. Denying them that only leaves them looking like the bad guys, for assaulting the students outside the event. It nipped this in the bud, at the low low price of our morale and integrity as a civil defense force”

Well at least Bogo was being honest about how everyone felt.

With a deep sigh, Bogo concluded: “The ZBI is aiming at using this to unravel the group before Xander’s next event. If not, we’ll be there to guard him and give these punks the fight they want, alright?”

This time the bullpen erupted in cheers and gung-ho hoots. Bogo’s grim expression even softened into a slightly neutral one – a smile to every officer in the room who knew Bogo – for he was quite pleased that he had managed to restore morale so quickly and efficiently.

Once the morning briefing was over, Nick and Judy approached Bogo with one last question: Why had they not been warned and briefed in advance?

“Because if you had known, you would have told the organizers – don’t deny it. I know you too well Hopps” Bogo replied, walking off in a hurry.

Nick glanced at his partner, worried that she would be upset over Bogo’s explanation and accusation: “Carrots, you cool?”

“Yes, I... he’s right – I would have told them” Judy said, sounding very self-conscious, but not in a bad way.

With the morning briefing over, the next point of order for the duo was getting down to the motor pool, where they sent a text to Savage, asking where he wanted to be picked up.

The reply was an address an address that the duo quickly found to be a private airfield in the south end of Sahara Square.

“Airfield? Did he fly out of town?” Nick wondered, justifiably curious.

Judy couldn’t say – but was curious just the same: “No clue – hey, while you’re at it, check our emails. Do we have any new things to do today, or are we just on no-fun no-risk patrol again?” 

It turned out that Jack hadn’t been out of town – but he had snuck in a little work: An early morning lesson in flying a helicopter. It was for the same movie role that he was using Nick and Judy to prepare with.

Seeing the bunny buck land his chopper, say goodbye to his instructor – a koala - get out, and then have the air-traffic controller – a giraffe – pick the comparably small helicopter up and walk it over to a hangar, was a little odd, but no stranger than any other mixed-size business in the city.

“Alright – thanks for the pickup. I had to take this, got my certification test next week on Thursday” Jack said, already in his brown fur disguise – so what’s on the docket today? Something fun?”

The duo was a little surprised that Jack wasn’t asking about the riot – but as they had noticed on their ride to the airfield that none of the morning radio shows had really mentioned it either. Had city hall called in a media blackout to prevent the anarchists from getting any kind of publicity? Made sense if that was the case.

“Sort of – we have another happy fun escort run” Nick said, overbearingly cheerfully.

The buck shot Judy a “please tell me that’s not true” look. Judy could only shrug apologetically and force a smile.

Getting into the cruiser, Jack asked who they were picking up and where they were going – and why.

“Ok, well... because we did such a great job the other day at Pecker, city hall wants us to escort an EPA agent to a farm west of the city, just beyond the Catskill range” Nick explained, while Judy started the cruiser up and drove off.

The EPA agent, a gopher who wasn’t particularly talkative, had to check for illegal and toxic pesticide use at a large acorn farm. 

Driving north out of the city via the rainforest district, briefly through the meadowlands, then around the Catskills for about an hour or so on the highway before the land smoothed out and turned into an endless sea of neat rows and columns of neatly trimmed oak trees.

At the games Judy exchanged some heated words with a very recalcitrant orchard owner – the squirrel’s ‘argument’ seemed to be that he felt that the EPA was interfering with his ability to do business. Nick towering over the guy made him open the gate.

Once inside things turned out to be dreadfully boring. Watching the gopher take countless samples of the nut flour, the nut oil, the raw nuts, the soil and the tree bark was about as interesting as it sounded. It made the trio wonder – more than once.

The only reprieve they got during the assignment was a message from Clawhauser on the gang from the other day that had been taken out: “Hey you two – TUSK just raided the gang’s hideout, found a half-grown crop of howler flowers. Great find you made there”

“That’s great Clawhauser. Any news on who took down the gang in the first place?” Nick asked, bored out of his mind.

Clawhauser replied: “Yes actually – the latest I’ve heard from the detective in charge of that case is that she doesn’t think it’s a vigilante any more. Probably a rival gang looking to send a message and muscle in on their drug dealing”

“Makes sense, leaving them out in the open to be found like that – to send a message like you said. Any leads on who did it?” Nick asked, struggling not to yawn while the gopher put some dirt in a jar.

About three in the afternoon the gopher was done, and the drive back to the city didn’t leave much time for any regular patrol work... it also didn’t help that nobody had gotten any lunch after the gopher had been dropped off.

With three pairs of hungry eyes scouting for anything that looked to sell a quick meal through the mists of the rainforest district, the radio bulleting that suddenly sounded came as quite the surprise: “Calling all units, calling all units: The residents at the Golden Oaks assisted living facility are rioting. Any unit available respond asap – darts over tasers, psychotic residents are dangerous up close”

Jack wasn’t even sure if he should cheer on the fact that they finally had something interesting to do – they were hungry, and it sounded a little too dangerous for what he was allowed to come near... but the bulletin GPS showed that the place was really close to them!

“This is One-Ten-Six, we’re a minute away from the place – but we have a guest along. Permission to-“ Judy began, only to be cut off by Bogo on the radio: “Go, just keep him in the cruiser or drop him off at a safe distance – and be careful, if the mental patients there are off their meds they might need more than one dart to go down!”

Judy glanced at Jack, and Nick looked the GPS. Jack looked eager.

Rushing to the assisted living facility, the trio found the place on lockdown – well, the outer chain-link gate was locked, and nobody was responding on the intercom to open the place. It didn’t help that the swampy terrain around the place smelled like farts.

“We’re at Golden Oaks, but the gates are locked – do we bust in?” Judy called in via the radio.

The sound of glass shattering and a mammal screaming as he was tossed out of a window, from inside the gate, was all the permission they needed.  
Gunning the engine, Judy crashed the cruiser through the gate.

Leaping out, the duo found the defenestrated mammal groaning in pain on the ground: A young stoat in a staff uniform.

“Are you ok? Any cuts?” Judy asked, helping the stoat get up and brushing him off.

The stoat nodded, looking a bit dizzy: “Nothing serious, I think – but the residents! They’re off their meds – all of them. No idea how this happened... I think the other staffers barricaded themselves in the staff lounge”

Nick nodded, thankful that the stoat was coherent enough to give them a quick overview.

Calling the update in, Nick and Judy made their way inside in search of the remaining staff.

About an hour later, with five ZPD cruisers from three different precincts parked out in front of the facility, Judy collected the last of the after action statements for her report.

“You know, they never told me that crazy mammals off their meds coming at you were that easy to dart” Nick noted, jostling his empty bag of spent darts around.  
Judy exhaled after a deep breath: “That’s one way to put it – but most of them were just trying to hide or run away... between us and the staff, how many residents got darted again?”

“Eighteen I think – do we count the staffer who nailed herself in the leg?” Nick wondered.

Chuckling, the bunny shook her head: “I don’t think so – that can go into the comment section of our report”

“Hey everyone, check this out” an officer from precinct four called out, from just outside the gate.

Walking towards the source of the voice, the thick rainforest district mist not giving anyone much visibility at all, the duo found the officer in question, a hippo, next to the front sign of the facility.

It had been spraypainted over with bright purple graffiti, which read: “No more poison”

“Interesting” Nick noted, Judy nodding.

With their statements collected and the facility investigation taken over by the local officers from precinct two, the trio left. All in all the event had been quite satisfying: Once things had come under control, Jack had walked the halls of the facility and taken a ton of notes, so he was pleased as punch. The facility’s cafeteria also had food available, which meant that the trio had finally gotten lunch – that had made Nick and Judy quite happy, though Jack had found the spread criminally bland.

“Say, is that all you had to do there? Just get things under control? No investigation of who did it?” Jack asked casually, tapping his notebook with his pen.

Nick yawned and looked at the clock – it was overtime o’ clock: “Who’s there to investigate? And the rainforest district is precinct two’s jurisdiction, so we let them do that if there is anything to pursue. Precinct one’s is chiefly downtown and Savannah Central, basically all the dense urban and suburban parts of Zootopia, but when you get a call like that everyone in the area responds. That’s also why precinct one is so big, compared to the other precincts – they’re really more like local sheriffs offices, but don’t let them hear that”

“Oh ok, but wait – what do the other precincts then do for forensics and mammals they arrest?” the buck wondered, thinking that the small sheriff stations he knew in the rural areas around Zootopia’s were really tiny and really didn’t have any kind of facilities like that.

Judy shook her head – hard – her ears flapping about a bit: “That’s why we took the mammals we caught the other day ‘central’ booking, which is at precinct one. The local precincts have small holding cells, but if we’re charging a mammal and sending them to court, they go to central booking. They handle transfers to the city jail where they’ll wait until they post bail or have their court date – evidence works the same way. Third floor is all lab rats at precinct on, and officers from all precincts have a special kind of drive-in drop off point for small bits of evidence, or you use the cargo lift in the motor pool. CSIs basically do the same – and most of ZPD’s detectives operate out of precinct one as well, though they often move to other precincts when doing cases there”

The next day in the bullpen Bogo announced that the Golden Oaks incident had been transferred to precinct one, and the case had been given to Detective Sleeves, nodding towards the casually dressed coati sitting in the back of the bullpen.

“Sir, why are we launching a criminal investigation into that? Mental patients who go off their meds, that’s not exactly a crime” Officer Delgato asked.

Bogo nodded, the cape buffalo expressing sympathy for the strange sounding investigation: “Preliminary testimony from the patients indicate that someone talked them into not taking their medicine – that’s criminal negligence at best, at worst its conspiracy to mammal-slaughter, considering that one of the residents – a muskrat – accidentally got stomped and killed by another resident, a cow, during the chaos”

The coati cleared his throat and stood up: “That’s at least what it looks like so far. I have a lot of reports from the officers at the scene, testimonies from the staff and security footage to sift through, and that’s not counting the interviews I’ll need to conduct with the residents once they’re properly medicated and stable again – wouldn’t mind a little help with all that initial work”

Bogo looked around the room for volunteers: “Hopps, Wilde – you two and your ‘observer’ are on that. The more eyes there are to go through those videos, the sooner we can find who did this”

Nick and Judy shared a look of “we just got voluntold, didn’t we”

After the morning briefing, Nick and Judy met with the coati detective outside the bullpen. The coati seemed quite happy to have some extra eyes to go through all the security footage: “I have no idea when this mystery mammal who told the residents to quit their meds showed up – and we’ll need to match visitor log signatures with descriptions from the residents”

“But you said the residents aren’t ready to be interviewed” Judy pointed out.

The coati made an understanding gesture, but whipped out his phone and pulled up a text document, checking some numbers: “Right... ya, here we go. No, the trick is that we don’t even know if it was the same mammal who talked them all into quitting their meds, or if it was a group effort, or a fluke – so I need to have an index of all the mammals that have come and gone from the place in the last three months. I don’t expect you to ID them, just give me a rundown of species and general description, so I can match that to what I’ll hopefully get from interviewing the residents”

The duo nodded and called Jack up, asking if he was down for watching through some absolutely thrilling security videos.

“Judy, darling, please tell me you’re kidding about them being thrilling” Jack replied over the phone.

Judy shot Nick a bemused grin: “Maybe... but my point is that the Golden Oaks thing, we’re investigating it. A resident got stomped, so we need to find who got the patients to stop taking their pills – you know, might be murder”

“Alright, murder investigation! Should I come down to the precinct then?”

Half an hour later the four of them were pouring over three months worth of security footage. 

Now, either Sleeves had never seen a Jack Savage movie, or Jack’s casual candor – combined with his brown fur dye – had rendered him utterly inrecognizable to the coati. Either way, Sleeves didn’t question who Jack was.

First up Sleeves had the trio focus on footage from the parking lot and main entrance, the only way in and out of the facility – they just needed that list of mammals that had come and gone, along with times and dates – just for the last three months to begin with. That was still ninety days times twenty four hours worth of video records to fast forward through.

Detective Sleeves turned out to be a good sport though, ordering bountiful amounts of coffee and lunch for everyone – and afternoon snacks to boot. Apparently then Sleeves often got cases loaded with tons of busy-work, and thus had a well-rehearsed snack protocol to maintain his work efficiency.

While Nick, Judy and Jack divided the camera footage up among them, fast forwarding between mammals showing up on their screens, taking notes of species and description, then Sleeves was mainly on the phone with the CSIs working at the facility. Apparently then they were having difficulties with the staff and residents, since keeping schizophrenic mammals away from the strangely dressed CSIs was proving difficult, and generally avoiding crime scene contamination was turning out to be pretty much impossible.

It was about three in the afternoon, with four empty bags of toasty-puff carrot sticks between them, that Jack noticed something weird on the video he was going through: “Hey gang, check this out”

Clicking back thirty seconds on the video he was working on, from about a month and a half ago, eight eyeballs looked on intently at the security video from the front entrance of the facility: At first, nothing, but then the front door slid open and a mammal in a long brown coat stepped out. It wasn’t the coat that was interesting though, it was the fact that the mammal’s head was completely obscured by a bright light – as if the mammal’s head was a big old lightbulb.

“Dear gods... that has to be the shiniest teeth in all of Zootopia. I need a dentist who can do that” Nick joked.

The detective and Judy remained silent, their focus on the video unwavering despite Nick’s comment. Jack scratched his chin and paused the video: “I think I’ve seen something like that on set...”

“On set?” the coati asked curiously, finding the term odd to hear from a ‘city hall observer’.

Jack whipped a piece of paper out of his pocket and gave it to the detective. Nick chuckled as the coati skimmed it: “An NDA? What? Who are you?”

“Sign it and find out – or don’t, and take it up with Bogo – either way he’s cleared to help” Judy noted confidently.

His curiosity getting the better of him, in part due to Judy vouching for Jack, Sleeves scribbled a signature on the dotted line.

Jack spun around on his desk chair and stuck out a hand to shake Sleeves’: “Jack Savage, actor, movie star and Zootopia’s most eligble single bunny buck”

The detective shook the actor’s hand, looking somewhat unimpressed: “I’m more of a theatre fan” 

With that revelation over with, Jack explained that the infra-red range finders they used in sound stages to measure distances to cameras, microphones and lighting would look like crazy big flares on camera – because the good ones could pick up infrared light in addition to normal visible light.

“Ok, so we’re dealing with a mammal who’s using an infrared light on or in their hat to obscure it from cameras – can we tell anything else about this mammal?” Sleeves asked in an open-ended fashion.

Using the time tags on the video, they found more security footage from inside the facility of the mystery mammal. Most of it was obscured by the light, but in a few shots of the back of the mammal the infra-red light wasn’t visible, giving the four of them a good view of the mammal from behind.

“Ok, zoom in on the head there, and the feet there. Black fur, that shape – looks like a badger” Judy noted, as Nick fiddled with the zoom controls.

Sleeves nodded: “I can confirm that with the staff – get a screenshot of that, and note down the time and date. Whoever it is, he is wearing a white coat inside the facility. A lab-coat? A doctor?”

“Maybe – hard to tell. The video is really grainy when you’re zoomed in this much” Nick noted.

Spending the rest of the day mapping out when the mystery maybe-badger had come and gone, Sleeves said that he’d get back to the trio after he had talked with the facility staff and residents.


	5. Chasing Sweet Highs

A few days of reasonably average low-risk patrols later Detective Sleeves called Nick and Judy in.

Sleeves’ office was piled high with case files and printed out reports. The coati appeared dwarfed by his caseload, but didn’t seem to mind.

“Ok, so what’s new?” Nick asked, looking around at the office. The walls were covered in framed cut out newspaper articles, probably from cases that Sleeves had worked on.

The coati danced around a very full trash can full of hopefully empty snarlbucks coffee cups: “Oh hey – I just wanted to give you an update, and then hear what you think”

Nick shot Sleeves a curious raised eyebrow: “Go on”

Jack pulled out his notebook and readied his pen, as the detective detailed his findings: “Ok, first of all the mammal-slaughter charge for our mystery mammal is off the table – turned out that the cow had beef with the stomped muskrat, mental issues and whatnot – so that’s being handled by shrinks – but, on the plus side then I think I’ve confirmed the species of the mystery mammal”

Nick, Judy and Jack all waited for Sleeves to tell them.

“A female honey badger. I have both staff and residents confirming it, and the staff said that she claimed to be a medical student working on a thesis about the adverse effects of anti-psychotics” Sleeves explained.

Judy nodded: “Ok, did you check with ZU’s medicine department?”

“I did – they do not have any honey badgers enrolled, and the visitor log at the facility... the tablet they used for that had gotten a virus in it that would wipe new entries at certain times, specifically when our honey badger would come visit” Sleeves explained, sounding equal parts frustrated and excited.  
Jack finished taking his notes: “So... we know she’s a honey badger, how do we find her?”

“Well that’s the catch – she used a fake identity to get into the facility and talk to the residents, and talked them out of taking their meds on the sly, but it’s been a while since she was there, and the CSIs didn’t find any honey badger DNA, so that’s why I called you in: I have no leads, a flimsy at best clue about her MO and that’s if it was her who tagged the front sign of the place - and no idea where to continue” Detective Sleeves said, sitting down on a stack of papers, looking rather disapointed.

Savage looked at Nick and Judy with rapt attention, hoping to see some kind of secret gem of police work. Judy shrugged: “I don’t know any honey badgers, Nick?”  
“I know one – but it’s been years since I saw her last, and this sounds a little extreme, even for her” Nick mused, looking pensive as he tried to recall any relevant details.

Looking happy to anything instead of having nothing to work with, Sleeves perked up: “Oh do tell – what do you mean ‘even for her’ – has she done something like this before?”

“No, she went by the name of Honey – original, I know – but she was a paranoid conspiracy nut, lived in a homemade bunker down in the old abandoned subway tunnels. I’m sure she had a blast with the Bellwether reveal, but going after a home for mental patients? She was always more of a tinfoil hat type” Nick explained, smirking at some of the more amusing things he recalled about her.

Nick added that he had chiefly known her via the stuff she had bought through him: Being paranoid, she didn’t have a bank account or anything like that, because she thought she could be tracked via that, and she still needed groceries and other things – she loved to tinker and make inventions, usually homemade tasers and other self-defence tools and traps: “Getting to her front door was literally like walking through a mine field”

“Interesting – the message spray-painted on the sign at the facility would make sense if you were under the delusion that anti-psychotics were mind-control drugs” Sleeves mused.

Judy looked a little unimpressed at that conclusion: “They are mind-control drugs. They help the patients get control of their own minds – otherwise they would be crazy”

“Good point – but Nick, do you know if she ever got aggressive? Went after anyone or anything?” the detective wondered.

Nick could only shake his head: “No, last time I met her she just wanted to be left alone – her thing was trying to dodge the ‘evil mind-control waves’ from cellphones, or the secret scent messages in butter – and she always contacted me first, so I have no clue how to find her”

A couple of days later the trio got a new message from Sleeves, while out on low-risk patrol: A few strands of honey badger fur had been found inside one of the Golden Oaks resident’s rooms, but it didn’t yield any DNA hits in the system. Without any other leads, with no other honey badgers known in the police system for anti-drug activities, the case going to be shelved.

“Wait... is that just it?” Jack asked, sounding understandably disappointed.

Judy sighed, audibly so: “Unfortunately, yes. No more leads, no more clues, no real suspects – even with Nick’s old acquaintance who we have no clue where is, plus the MO Nick had on her didn’t really fit with this crime”

“I get that – but it’s just, giving up on a big case like this...” Jack said, looking for words and excuses to stay on the case, but finding none.

Nick clicked a button on the cruiser’s dash-puter, closing the email from Sleeves: “Big case? No, this is nothing. With the mammal-slaughter charge gone, all that was ultimately done is barely even criminal, since talking mammals into not taking their meds isn’t a crime. Whoever did this can at best be given the bill for the damages done to the place, which wasn’t much, since it was built to withstand that kind of fighting”

It seemed to come as quite a shock to Jack that the case had this low a priority. That it had turned into an inglorious search for someone to stick a bill for damages hadn’t even occurred to the actor.

The next day, once again on low-risk patrol, the trio swung through the more lightly urbanized parts of Savannah Central. A topic of conversation that had come up was that of police presence.

Jack had basically questioned what the point of having police drive around in a place that hadn’t called for the police, but after explaining what the concept of “projecting police presence” meant, and calling in a removal for a very illegally parked pickup truck, which was parked over three parking spaces and blocked a fire exit, then it was time for lunch.

“Tell me, do you two always just roll into a drive-through, or raid a snack-shack for something to go for lunch?” Jack wondered idly, as he munched on his five-bean burrito.

Wondering exactly what the smoked strips of bug meat in his munch-box had been seasoned with, Nick idly noted: “It varies – but there really isn’t room to store a lunchbox in here, and while there AC in here, then there isn’t in the trunk if you want to stash them there...”

“Plus, if you get a call mid-lunch you’re expected to toss it and roll out – that’s where the myth of the cops wasting time at donut shops come from: I know a lot of patrol teams that just snack on and off all day, instead of having a big lunch they might have to throw out, because you don’t get time to pack it away” Judy added, picking at her ‘carrot explosion’ salad, which had turned out to be a lot less interesting to eat than expected.

Twenty minutes after lunch, a call for a domestic disturbance came in. Responding to it, they found it to be a case of a neighbour annoyed at a young couple having really noisy sex. Mildly amused, and telling the young couple to close their windows, the trio drove off.

“Say, what’s the protocol if the husband had actually been beating up his wife?” Jack asked, clearly angling for something juicy to write down.

Nick was about to say something, when Judy and her near encyclopaedic knowledge churned out a response first: “Actually, in at least two thirds of that kind of cases they’re beating on each other – and all in all, the wife is as likely to be abusing the husband. It mainly comes down to species and their relative dimorphism on how they do it”

That made absolutely no sense to Jack – well, the first bit did, but species and dimo-what?

“Sexual dimorphism. You know, hyena males being smaller and weaker than hyena females – with them it’s usually always the wife who gets violent if there is anything. Same goes for a lot of other mammals where the females are bigger, especially with small mammals” Judy very quickly explained.

Jack’s right thumb seemed to hover around his pen for a few pensive moments, appearing unsure if he should be writing that down or not: “Hold on, so it’s always the bigger mammal that gets more violent? But you said it was equal?”

“If you’re bigger and stronger, then statistically you’re more likely to use that in a conflict. The smaller partner is in turn more likely to use weapons, poison, or get another mammal involved to fight for or with them – but in the end it evens out more or less” Nick pointed out, noting the age-old stereotype of the angry wife smacking her husband with a skillet, as seen often in cartoons.

The buck didn’t even bother clicking his pen, having concluded that facts like that would be politically incorrect poison to any movie script – even if it was true: “Interesting...”

“I guess so – that’s one of things about being a cop: You get see the bad side of mammals all the time, to the point that it can become hard to not see it. It’s easy to get disillusioned by that. Anyone can in theory train to pass the physical and written tests at the academy. It’s whether or not you can stomach that kind stuff without becoming too cynical or getting depressed that determines if you’re cut out to be a cop in the long run” Judy said, her tone bordering on gloomy, but clinging ever so slightly to the side of positivity.

This Jack wrote down with gusto: “So... what kind of stuff brings a cop down the fastest, if you don’t mind me asking?”

A voice on the radio cut Nick and Judy off before answer that: “Two rodent gangs spotted fighting at a ball court at third and Den street, please respond”

Jack had at this point learned the difference between a call like that asking for a single unit, or multiple units. In this case dispatch was only asking for a single unit to check out the skirmish, at least initially. He had also learned that police dispatch’s own system would only route calls like that to nearby patrol cars, instead of all police cruisers throughout the city, using a kind of GPS match-making system. 

“This is One-Ten-Six, we’re on it” Nick quick said, Judy switching on the sirens and hitting the gas.

The actor didn’t find these kinds of small calls that interesting anymore, having sat through several of them already. As the cruiser pulled up next to a very small ball court three blocks from Little Rodentia, the trio found about two dozen hamsters fighting. It looked like balls of grey, brown and russet fur tumbling around, with lots of angry squeaks and tiny twigs flying around – or what amounted to wooden clubs for the small mammals.

Towering above the fight, Judy pulled out her taser and quite loudly cleared her throat: “Ahem – this stops right now, or we stop it for you”

Jack couldn’t help but notice that Nick seemed a little disappointed while Judy tried to talk down the two gangs: “What’s wrong?”

“Usually gangs like this will have lookouts to spot police coming, even if they’re fighting – this is really sloppy” The tod mused, adjusting his mirror sunglasses.

Judy was holding two hamsters up, one in each paw, and scowling angrily at them: “What is this about”

“They raided our stash!” the hamster on the left cried out. The one on the right responded with some very angry expletives, but among those she also proclaimed the innocence of her gang.

While Judy shook a little more information out of the two hamsters, Jack asked Nick a related question about that kind of gang activity: “Is it normal for gangs to steal things from each other?”

“Depends on what they say the other ones took. Could be drugs, could be something purely symbolic – like stealing their gaming consoles, or putting up graffiti tags all over their hideout. That can be like the other gang we saw earlier in that alley: Sending a message, you know, the good old ‘we know where you hang out and you can’t protect yourselves against us, so you better not mess with us’ kind of deal” Nick said, sounding ever so mildly amused by what he said. What Jack didn’t know was that Nick’s bemusement came from older memories having sold a large amount of dinner plates and cutlery and some microwave ovens to a gang, after a rival gang completely cleaned out their hideout’s kitchen in a similar gang war. What had the most fun part of all of that, was that upon delivery Nick had seen that the Kitchen had been stripped down completely: Power sockets, cabinet doors, even the light in their fridge had been stripped away. The gang had ended up purchasing replacements for most of those things via Nick and Finnick, so they weren’t spotted buying the stuff themselves, because that would be admitting to the raid.

Ultimately Judy managed to suss out what the fighting had been about: The Third Street Munchkins, with their dark orange gang and black gang colors, believed that it was the black and white Bone-Hustlers who had raided their drug stash. Oh sure, they hadn’t exactly admitted to Judy that they had possessed illegal drugs, but the implications were obvious in what little they had said.

The Bone-Hustlers in turn flat out denied having stolen anything – confirming that the Munchkins were talking about drugs in that they said that they didn’t deal in drugs, so why should they have stolen any?

The point of contention was that the Munchkins claimed to have found black and white fur at the ‘stash’ – their drug stash according to the bone-heads - and since a lot of the bone-head hamsters had dyed their fur partially or completely black and white, then that kind of fur did point towards the bone-heads.

There was just one problem with that accusation, a problem that even Jack noticed when one of the munchkins pulled out the three strands of fur they had found: The black and one white strands of fur were about an inch long, coarse, and quite obviously way too big to have come from a hamster, but they were the perfect length for a honey badger. 

“This is One-Ten-Six, we need a warrant to search the hideout of The Third Street Munchkins. We have probable cause that they are or were storing drugs there, with intent to distribute – and that they were recently raided by a honey badger” Nick called in.

The munchkins did not exactly like the idea of having their crash pad tossed, but as Judy put it: “Consider it your punishment for picking a fight with the bone-heads – and you wouldn’t dream of trying to stop us, right?”

The dozen or so hamsters all shook their heads resentfully. The bone-heads gleefully shared the address of the munchkin’s hideout, their high-pitched taunting laughter continuing as they walked away to tend to their bruises.

The warrant ticked in via the cruiser’s printer, and the trio were joined up by two squad cars from precinct six at the munchkins.

With the whole gang having left the place, except for a few stragglers who were far too high or asleep to put up any kind of resistance, the search of the munchkin’s hideout went over quite peacefully.

Jack found it quite interesting – albeit very cramped: Him and Judy were just small enough to fit through the doors to the place, while Nick had to wait outside, giving him ample time to marvel at the graffiti and the hamster-sized sign that read “Third Street Corner Club”.

“So... this looks more like a warehouse than a clubhouse” Jack noted, feeling as if he had walked into a set of Godzilla, since everything around him was made for mammals less than a fifth his size.

Judy’s eyes darted all over the place, looking for signs of anything that might hide a secret passage or trapdoor: “Most of this is probably stolen – but we’ll let the local precinct six officers sort that out. The real trick is to find their drug stash: They wouldn’t have that out in the open. Look for a hidden door or something”

“You mean like this?” Jack asked, pushing a large (by hamster scale) framed poster aside to reveal a hole in the dry-wall. The edges of the hole were chewed up, hinting of how the hole had been made, and inside there was a large relatively empty room with sparse lighting.

It was obvious, when inside the room, that the cornerclub had been built with the secret room in mind. The walls were naked plaster and dry-wall, but this had clearly been there a while. Of course, the dirty great hole in the floor was by far the most interesting detail: The room was about four by four feet in size, with a two foot hole in the middle of it.

That was when the smell hit Judy. The hole went straight down into an open sewer line.

CSIs and a city hall structural engineer were called in, both to examine the hole and to see if it had impacted the structural integrity of the place.

Once again, Jack found the notion of simply signing over that kind of investigation to someone else somewhat boring: “But come on – I’m sure we can help, like investigate where the hole in the sewer leads, or question the gang members”

“I know, but we can’t fit in there – and none of us wants to go exploring down in the sewers. Me and Judy did a quick dive in a sewer line a couple of months ago. None of us need those memories refreshed” Nick stated somewhat bluntly, sounding none too eager to wade through knee-high piss, poop and whatever else the mammals in the particular neighbourhood would flush down the john.

A few days later Sleeves called the trio in again. Judy said that he had sounded excited on the phone.

“So, what’s the scoop?” Nick asked as they stepped into the coati’s office.

Out from the chasms of report stacks, Sleeves snaked his way out into the open: “Hey, I’ve got great news... and an even bigger caseload thanks to you lot”  
Nick shot the detective a curious raised eyebrow.

The CSI report from the munchkin gang hideout hadn’t come in yet, but what would be in was a foregone conclusion: A honey badger had ‘stolen’ a bunch of illegal N2 pills from the gang. This of course wasn’t news. What was news was that Sleeves had compared the theft to other break-ins at suspected gang hideouts: “There have been eight other break-ins over the last month – and while forensics from most of them are sketchy at best, then the MO for all of them is identical: someone used a solvent to melt a hole through the ground or walls, and nicked all the drugs!”

Ok that was new and interesting.

“Still, we need a little more information to confirm this. I have a million new reports I need to read, so I need you two to meet with an informant. He’s an aardvark who knows the Zootopia drug scene well and he’ll hopefully have more information” Sleeves said, gazing at his piles of reports like a mountain-climber at the foothills of a mountain that nobody has ever scaled before.

With information on when and where to meet the informant – the meeting had been set up for right after lunch – the trio drove off to Sahara Square.

The location for the meeting was a rather non-descript tea-house, with a camel at the till who looked like he was ready to commit murder just to be anywhere else more interesting. Nick had never seen such a bored camel before.

Having changed out of their uniforms, Judy sat in the rearmost booth, waiting for the informant. Between the two of them, Nick had agreed that Judy should meet the informant since she looked the least intimidating. Jack was told that informants were often quite skittish, especially when they had to meet a new and unknown officer for an information drop-off.

“You from Sleeves?” an aardvark suddenly asked with a thick Sahara Square accent, about ten minutes after the scheduled meeting time.

Judy was caught off guard by the sudden question, having become so focused on how bored she was with waiting for the aardvark, that she hadn’t noticed the mammal walk up to her and sit down opposite to her.

In the cruiser parked a block away, Nick and Judy listened in via Judy’s hidden audio-bug. Informants weren’t always recorded, but just to show off for Jack they had taken the extra effort – plus it meant that Nick and Jack could listen in.

“Yes I am – you have any information from me?” Judy said, straightening out her shirt and skirt.

The aardvark leaned out of the booth and scanned the tea-house. There were nobody else there other than the really bored camel: “Ok, I’ve heard of at least two dozen gangs and other small time dealers that have been robbed or mugged over the last three months. These aren’t mammals who report things to police, but the dealers have shared notes: It’s a medium sized mammal, uses sewage to hide his scent, and has a really mean toasty taser”

“Did any of them say it was a honey badger?” Judy inquired, looking as if she had just asked a murder suspect if he had done it.

For a moment the aardvark didn’t say a word, as if he had simply skipped a beat, but then Judy saw his lip curl and his ears flatten: “You know who it is? You gotta tell me who it is!”

“Hold on – you’re the informant here, not me” Judy said, wagging a finger at the angry mammal.

The aardvark got up, looking quite incensed. Judy leaned back, not sure what to expect, but then the door tot he tea-shop swung open and Jack burst in: “Kösk you lying bastard – you’re not giving her the whole story!”

Already standing up, Mr Kösk flinched hard and nearly fell over. He had half-way crawled under the table when Nick had gotten over to him, Nick bursting in just then: “Hey – damn-it... sorry, I tried to stop him Judy”

“What are you doing here? You know full well you’re not allowed to interfere with police work” Judy said, her feet feeling like they should pull off some good angry thumping.

Kösk stopped trying to get in under the table, slowly emerging: “Hold the fuck up... is that you Savage?”

“Yes it’s me – and you’re not telling Officer Hopps that you’re a dealer as well. Did the honey badger get you too?” Jack quickly said, giving Kösk the stink-eye.  
Finally reaching the two bunnies and the aardvark, and looking a bit out of breath, Nick apologized again to Judy: “Sorry – I tried to stop him. He apparently knows our guy here”

Looking at Nick, then giving Jack an annoyed look, before settling on Kösk, Judy took a deep breath and asked: “Is that true?”

Jack might have been half the aardvark’s size – but Kösk was behaving as if it was the other way around, especially as the two sat down in the booth: “Hey I’m... you can’t ask me to incriminate myself!”

“Did you get attacked and robbed by a honey badger, just like all your other buddies? You’re not incriminating yourself by admitting to that” Jack said in a stern and accusatory tone.

Nick was about to admonish the actor when he saw that Judy looking more curious than angry, so he let it slide.

The aardvark sighed: “Yes, got tased real good two months – my tail wouldn’t stop twitching for a week”

As things calmed down a little more, and the aardwark got his informant pay, things got a little more clear: Apparently nobody among the gangs that dealt, or the more independent dealers like Kösk, knew who was attacking them. Nobody was taking credit, and nobody appeared to be trying to corner the market, despite the main thing that the mystery mammal was was taking was N2 pills.

With his pay in paw, the aardwark left through the back, leaving the trio to sort out the issue of Jack’s interference.

“Ok, look – I know I wasn’t supposed to do that, but I recognized his voice” Jack said apologetically, nursing a cup of milk with a little tea in it.

Nick and Judy shared a look, the two trying to get a read on what they were thinking on the subject without telling Jack about it up front. Neither seemed that angry, so it appeared that their silent consensus was to let it slide.

“Ok, but we’re going to need to know how you know this Kösk fellow” Nick said, taking off his shades to look more sympathetic and reconciliatory.

Nodding, Jack explained that he had seen the aardwark at Vinewood parties: He was a dealer to celebrities, or to celebrity entourages, who in turn would supply their celebrities as needed. Again Jack proclaimed that he hadn’t done any kind of drugs for years – having grown out of that kind of nosh many years ago.

With that sorted out, the trio reported back to Sleeves over phone. The information about the many more unreported attacks and robberies, along with the rough confirmation that it was a honey badger – or several – doing it, prompted Sleeves to ask if Nick and Judy were up for a little sting.

“Sounds like fun – what’s the plan?” Nick responded, Judy and Jack both nodding.

Detective Sleeves wanted Nick to pose as a dealer near a popular nightclub in the downtown district, and set a trap for the dealer-robber.

“While it would no doubt be fun, then I’m going to have to pass that charade to Judy - on the off chance that it’s the honey badger I know who’s doing this, then it’s best that she does it” Nick replied.

What followed was a quick trip back to precinct one, Jack helping Judy through a bit of fur dye, after which the three raided the morgue for suitable dealer-looking clothes.

“Wow... that is a lot of dead mammals” Jack said in a mix of awe and veiled dread, looking at the many rows of hatches to the ‘fridges’ where dead mammals were stored.

Nick chuckled as Judy fiddled with the keys to the clothes storage room: “Don’t sweat it – a lot of those are empty”

“And the doctors here don’t mind us raiding their walk-in closet?” Jack wondered, still sounding rather uncomfortable.

Judy pushed the door open: “The coroners don’t mind – as long as they get dibs on any really nice clothes”

The buck didn’t really look like he had any comment he wanted to make to that – but the sight of all the clothes brought out his acting-chops, making him ignore his hang-ups at least temporarily.

Nick smiled as Jack leapt into the bins of clothes. Judy looked a little less enthusiastic, her skills at deception not being nearly as good as her yearning for justice... and having to play nice with mammals that would want to buy drugs? Sure, it was to catch a bigger criminal – it just didn’t sit well with her.

Grabbing the lost-in-her-thoughts doe, Jack yanked Judy inside the clothes storage room: “Come on – we need to find you a proper look!”

“Not you – it wouldn’t be proper to peek in on your partner when she changes clothes” Jack protested, closing the door in Nick’s face, the fox narrowly dodging getting bumped on the nose by the door.

The fox took a deep breath, then he smiled. This was by no means the first time that anyone had pulled something like that – and ultimately then it was a good thing, right? It meant that the charade was working, that him and Judy’s relationship was still a secret. Oh sure, internal affairs had signed off on him and her working together after they had gotten N2’d, even if it was with some reluctance, but Bogo had still said that they would need to keep it a secret... the potential outrage and scandal if two officers working together were found to be in a relationship – it would be bad – and that’s not even thinking about the social consequences of being found out to be dating outside your species.

Judy had tried to explain stuff about ‘mirror neurons’ and other weird things – but brain science was a few tiers above what Nick could fully wrap his head around. What he did understand was... interrupted as the door to the clothes storage opened up, Jack walking out followed by Judy.

Or rather, a Judy dressed in torn thigh-high fishnet stockings, a skirt so short it might as well not have been there, a purple tube-top that accented her eyes really well, and a near-black lizard-leather jacket – and at the bottom of her ears hung large golden hoop ear-rings, clip-ons probably.

Basically she looked like a very trendy prostitute – but damn if she did not look amazing.

Judy wasn’t slow to pick up on Nick’s reaction – or, reactions: Both his gawking, staring at her, and the erection. It was a little embarrassing, both for her and him, but at the same time then it felt good that he obviously liked how she looked.

Jack couldn’t help but notice Jack’s reaction either. Oh sure, he had expected some kind of reaction, perhaps a joke or funny quip about her look, but this? This was not really a professional reaction to seeing your partner dressed like a slutty club-goer... this was how a boyfriend would react to seeing his girlfriend dressed all sexy: “Oh no wonder you didn’t want to go out with me... how long have you two been an item?”

That comment instantly snapped Nick and Judy back to reality.


	6. Shocking Revelations

The morgue was quiet, like a tomb – if not for the distant dull electric hum of air-conditioning and cooling pumps.

Busted.

Nick had just spent the last few minutes dreading the potential fallout of being revealed to the public... and now Judy looked just as horrified, all the while Jack looked at the two with a bemused grin, as if he had walked in on the two making out: “A fox and a bunny... well here I thought I had seen everything back in Vinewood”

Judy very quickly cycled through her usual reactions to fear, shock and horror: The twitchy nose, the ear flicks, the antsy feet, the paws that didn’t really know what to do – she had to say something, anything!

“Oh it’s not like that... or it is – Look its complicated!” Nick blurted out, as Judy began to cry. This was so not how they had wanted this to get revealed.

Judy’s slutty club-goer disguise fell somewhat apart as she mindlessly walked over to Nick, grabbed hold around his waist and sobbed into his shirt.

“Hey, hold on – I didn’t mean to make anyone upset” Jack said, taking a step back. It was obvious to him that he had fucked up, he just didn’t understand what the issue was - to him this was just juicy gossip.

Nick stroked Judy’s head from front to back down her ears: “Do you have any idea how much trouble we’re going to be in now – and that’s just from work – the media will eat us alive”

“Oh hey – your secret is safe with me – couldn’t dream of spilling the beans on this” the buck quickly said, trying to come across as nice and understanding as possible.

Nick looked down at Judy, who looked up at him – they then both looked over at Jack, their distrust radiating from them to the point that Jack could feel it pushing him into the ground.

“Look, working in Vinewood – you see things, gossip and stuff – a lot more than what gets out into the tabloids. I can keep a secret, ok?” the actor said, putting on his best game-face to appear sympathetic.

Judy wiped on nose and took a deep breath: “Ok, listen – the only reason me and Nick are like this, it... we were drugged”

The buck’s brows furrowed into a look of mild confusion and disbelief, his gaze darting to and from Nick and Judy: “Drugged? What?”

Nick knelt down and helped Judy straighten out her outfit, and wipe her tears away: “Exactly like that nightmare scenario we talked about – it was during a bust at a drug lab about two months ago. We got dosed with N2, got found in the bushes later, naked, woke up in the hospital with our brains wired a little differently”

Jack dropped down to the cold plastic floor, looking absolutely terrified: “You mean... holy shit... it works across species too?”

“Yes, with no known cure – not that we’re complaining, but we really do not want to be become poster-couple for N2 use, or the kind of stuff it can lead to – we prefer living in sin, in private” Nick added, sounding deadly serious.

The three left the morgue, the buck looking quite shaken – while Nick and Judy managed to pull themselves together fairly quickly, drawing on their police experience to calm and steel themselves as they walked out into the public... even though it looked like a police fox and a police buck were escorting a prostitute out to their cruiser.

To maintain the illusion, Nick drove for once, with Judy in the back.

“So... tell me, does your chief know? Like, how many others know?” Jack asked, arguing that he needed to know who he really shouldn’t tell this to.

Judy grabbed Jack by the shoulder, the buck squirming under her tight grib: “You’re not going to tell anyone, do I make myself clear?”

“No of course not – I meant as a script pitch I might use the idea, but I’ll spin it so it doesn’t get traced back to you two. Just the basic idea: two cops of different species falling in love against their will, having to work it out, but keep it hidden. It’s perfect! The movie practically writes itself! It’s got Oscar-bait written all over it” Jack explained, sounds far too enthusiastic.

Judy looked up at Nick, who nodded back at her. Her fists unclenched: “Alright. Bogo knows, so does most our shift at work – anyone connected to the case it happened with, a few doctors and nurses – and internal affairs – but we’ve kept it a secret to everyone else so far, and we want to keep it that way”

“You got internal affairs to sign off on you two still working together? I thought that was against the rules” the actor wondered, finding that concept difficult to wrap his head around it. He knew well enough that it was standard government regulations, regardless of what agency or branch you looked at, that couples weren’t allowed to work together this directly.

Nick let out a bemused snort, turning the cruiser out into traffic: “Because it’s a workplace injury – we didn’t mean to get drugged, and if we got fired over that the police union would eat Bogo raw with a stick of celery up his butt”

“Sounds like FAG, the Film Actor’s Guild – they love to fuck over producer and directors that don’t play nice with their union rules” Jack noted, sighing in relief as the tension in the car seemed to have eased.

With all that drama taken care of, at least for now, the trio returned to the precinct one motor pool and checked out a surveillance van. The driver’s seat had been modified to fit Nick, and the van itself was painted to look like it was from a super generic computer repair shop.

For their last bit of prep-work the trio made a quick stop by their old friend Professor Mulberry. Jack had to stay in the van – going outside on a college campus carried a far too great a risk of him being recognized. If he got made he would get swarmed. Judy similarly had to stay in the van as well, leaving Nick in his comically geeky tech-support disguise to go say hi their old buddy.

The trio had already been issued dummy-drugs back at precinct one – but their excuse to go see Mulberry was to check with him to see if the stuff would pass the most common street tests. No sense in trying to impersonate a dealer if all your buyers would instantly call you out as a fake.

“Nine hells and wet fur Nick – you look hilarious” the pig said, taking a spin in his office chair just for kicks.

The thick greasy and heavenly smell of bacon permeated the office, Mulberry’s flat toaster sizzling away with the professor’s latest production run from his bio-printers. Nick breathed deeply: “It’s for an undercover gig I just came to see what you think about our placebos, and pick up another taste of heaven”

“You got the stuff with you?” Mulberry asked casually, taking out a wad of old newspaper and stacking about a pound of freshly cooked bacon on it before wrapping it up.

Nick presented a sample of the fake gel pills that Judy had been given to deal. The professor wasn’t impressed: “They’re not even blue... come on – but at least they taste right on the outside”

“The latest street-grade N2 isn’t – they’re harvesting sprouts, before the stuff gets potent. Usually no permanent effects, just a sexy high that lasts ten minutes or so. You don’t get nearly as sleepy either” Nick explained, running off the description he had gotten for the fake drugs.

The pig looked offended, handing Nick his pills back: “Why am I always the last one to learn stuff like that? Damnit – if the ethics committee would just let me test stuff like that... we legit do not know how much N2 is needed to put an isolated mammal to sleep yet! And now you're telling me that sprouts produce a weaker effect?”

“I know – would be nice to have a way to test if the stuff has been contaminated with N1 as well, but that’s life” Nick said in an annoyed tone as he pocketed the pills and retrieved something else.

The professor’s face brightened up as he saw Nick produce his payment for the bacon: “Oh excellent”

Nick gave the pig the USB stick: “Sows get Porked 4 through 9 and the Swinton porn parody you asked for – you know, you could just get a VPN or something”

“No, working with classified government secrets like nighthowler research has its costs – all my home computers are ‘secured’. I would lose my clearance if I access stuff like porn or torrent sites, or install software like that” Mulberry bemoaned.

Nick chuckled and turned to leave, bacon package in a bag: “Fair enough – Judy says hi by the way”

With the snack run done, it was finally time to get to the club that Sleeves had picked.

Now, between the reports that Sleeves had and what Kösk had explained, then it appeared as if the dealer-attacker mainly attacked mammals directly in the late afternoon – not in the evening. In addition, then this club hadn’t been hit yet, at least not by the mystery mammal. Instead, a week ago, most of the dealers that had operated near and in the club had been arrested in a sting operation. This meant that there was a nice vacancy for Judy to slip into.

Getting into position while Judy found a ‘nice’ alley near the Cat’s Away club’s main entrance, Nick parked the van well away from the club, but the wireless hidden cameras that Judy was setting up gave them a clear view of everything.

“Radio check – you getting this?” Nick said from inside the van, sitting on the chair in front of the monitors displaying her video feeds.

Judy replied while she tried to sit comfortably on the rodent-scale dumpster in the alley, touching the pawless phone-clip on her left ear to activate the radio in it: “I do – but damnit... do I really have to lug this rhino-taser around? I feel like I’m carrying a grenade launcher”

“Yes you do – we don’t know if another gang will try to move in on this place, plus if our honey badger shows up it’ll come in handy – and since when have you met a dealer who wasn’t armed?” Nick replied.

Around six the first club-goers started showing up at the Cat’s Away. Pika, mice, rats, hamsters and other small mammals all filed into the club – many of them gathering in groups outside first, waiting for friends. Some also began to peek into the alley that Judy had set up shop in. The dummy pills she had didn’t seem to arouse suspicion to the half dozen or so mammals that wanted to buy.

Around seven Jack left, having far more fun things to do on a Friday night than wait for Judy to get attacked. Nick didn’t mind: “See you Monday”

Of course, behind the kind farewell was the fact that once the Buck had left Nick had nobody to talk to... and the rest of the evening continued at an excruciatingly slow pace, only made barely tolerable by watching funny videos on zootube via his smartphone.

Around one in the morning Nick poked the radio: “Carrots, you still awake?”

“If by awake you mean almost out of fake pills to sell to drunk hamsters, then the answer is yes, yes I am awake... and bored to tears” Judy replied.

Nick popped a bemused eyebrow at Judy’s snark, and yawned: “You sound surprisingly awake considering how late it is”

“There’s a little corner kiosk place right next to here – I’m on my third Gulp-O-Chino” Judy’s voice sounded through Nick’s ear-piece.

The fox wished that he had packed more snacks and stuff to drink – you weren’t supposed to leave the surveillance van during a sting like this, so he hadn’t been able to leave for food or drink – and he knew that Judy would kill him if he touched the bacon without sharing.

“Officer Wilde, you there?” another voice sounded over the radio, catching Nick by surprise.

Fumbling with the audio switches, trying to turn things on and off so Judy wasn’t distracted by whatever call was coming, Nick replied: “Yes – who is it?”

“It’s Sleeves – you can pull Judy out. I just got a call from dispatch: A dealer outside a club in the rainforest district got zapped and mugged, they just found him. We’ll try with Judy again tomorrow, same place, to see how long it takes for our badger to catch on and take the bait”

Nick felt a tempting urge to bang his head against the tiny desk he was sitting at: “Roger”

Calling Judy back, the two drove off to a parking garage. You weren’t supposed to return an active undercover vehicle directly to a precinct, especially not when you had to continue the operation later. All of this sounded innocent enough, and was technically very easy, but Judy was hoped up on enough caffeine to kill a rhino – and she was feeling frisky.

“Please, Judy – I can barely stay awake here... at least save it until we get home” Nick pleaded, trying to keep the horny bunny from unbuttoning his shirt. It didn’t help that some of her disguise make-up had smeared a bit, making her look oddly gaunt and splotchy.

The two got out of the van and locked it up, Judy finding it difficult to keep her paws off Nick: “Oh come on...”

“No, now git – we can’t be seen going home the same way. I’ll take the train, you can call a zoober or something. You should have plenty of cash for it” Nick said wryly, not at all feeling up for any kind of hanky panky, especially not with Judy looking like she did.

Nick left Judy standing at the van rather annoyed – but deep down she knew that they really shouldn’t do anything that would blow their cover. They didn’t know if they were being watched, so maintaining some level of cover made sense.

Her ride home via zoober was boring and very tiring – whatever caffeine that had been in her system burning out by the time she got to the door. It wasn’t even that long a ride, but when she found Nick already asleep it struck her... how on earth had he gotten home via the trains faster than her in a zoober?

Oh well – such mysteries had stopped bothering her a long time ago. The only thing nagging her was that unscratched itch that had nagged her since at the van, but after digging through her old toy box and leaving a little ‘present’ and a note on the nightstand on Nick’s side of the bed, Judy went to bed certain that things would work out in the end – well, in someone’s end.

The next morning Nick awoke to the sound of classic rock from his digital alarm clock. It was set to only play that on weekends, so to him that was a very pleasant... also there was a strap-on resting on his alarm clock.

There was a note attached to the strap-on: “You may have been too tired last night, but if you don’t do me before breakfast, I’ll do you” it was signed with a cute little heart with bunny ears.

Nick chuckled, but reigned it in – he didn’t want to wake Judy. Carefully rolling over and shimmying closer to the sleeping bunny, Nick stretched a little and whispered: “Oh the things I do for love”

About fifteen seconds later Judy woke, her heart racing and her hips jittering uncontrollably. It wasn’t the first time Nick had woken her up with his tongue – though, waking her up with his tongue on that particular part of her body was new. What followed required a thorough shower afterwards to clean up, and a change of bedsheets, but neither of the two complained. Both agreed that it was a great way to start a Saturday.

Later, during brunch, Nick found an email on his phone. It was from Sleeves – it was an approval for weekend overtime: “So much for our plans tonight...”

“What is it?” Judy asked, her mouth half-full of bacon and eggs.

Nick showed her the email. Sleeves still wanted them back at the club later that evening and had gotten approval for it. They both agreed that they didn’t need overtime that badly, but at the same time they both wanted this mammal caught.

Oh the things you do for justice.

Much later on the same day, after dinner and a much bigger snack run, the two returned to the club. Judy had gotten some new fake drugs to sell, and Nick had enough snacks and coffee to last him through the night. They had helped each other putting on their disguises, Nick taking advantage more than once that they were alone while Judy put on her outfit to be the frisky one... because damn she looked good. Judy approved, though she did note that she’d rather die than be caught wearing that getup when not on the job.

The first thing they did before Judy snuck out of the van over to her spot near the Cat’s Away club, was check to see if the hidden cameras that Judy had set up were still working. They were. The cameras also revealed that a stoat in a long jacket who appeared to have taken up that dealer spot already.

Calling in a squad car to pass the club scared the stoat away for long enough that Judy could set up shop, and once the stoat returned to claim his spot Judy had her enormous rhino taser ready: “You want this spot, you’ll have to fight me for it”

The stoat backed off instead of pushing the topic, looking really pissed. Dispatch informed Nick that a call had been made shortly there-after to the ZPD, reporting Judy as a dealer. Classy.

The only other point of drama for the first hour or so of the sting was a hamster club-goer that came by. Her issue was that the pills she had bought last night had apparently not worked. Nick instructed Judy to brush the rodent off: “Just tell her that there’s a no refunds policy”

Judy complied, with the hamster leaving in a huff.

For the next half an hour, getting close to nine o’ clock, there were only clients and fake drug sales. Judy got her first Gulp-O-Chino.

At one point a gerbil in a very tiny leather jacket and neon-pink streaks of fur dye came up to Judy: “Hey beautiful – whatcha got?”

Judy rolled her eyes and ran through the script that Sleeves had given: “Uppers, downers, a fresh crop – what do you want?”

“Oh sweety I don’t want none of that... how about I give you a little something instead instead” the gerbil said in a noticeably lascivious raunchy tone.

Nick couldn’t help but laugh as he could see on the hidden cameras how Judy got flustered from being propositioned.

That was when the cameras cut out and the sound feed from Judy’s radio went silent.

Oh shit.

Looking at his phone, he saw that the four bars had turned to zero. They were being jammed!

This could only mean one thing.

Nick burst out of the van, tranq gun drawn. Rushing across the empty street, past the club, Nick looked down the alley: Judy was on the ground, groaning.

“Judy! You ok?” Nick cried out, rushing over to the downed bunny.

Looking up at Nick with some difficulty, Judy nodded: “Didn’t hear it coming – hate getting tazed”

Helping his partner up, they quickly confirmed that Judy wasn’t really hurt – but she had gotten zapped quite thoroughly. So much for that sting. Informing Judy of the jamming, Judy confirmed that the timing seemed about right. She had been hit just after Nick’s laughing had cut out.

This of course raised the question of where the attacker had gone – but Judy told Nick not to bother: “There’s a GPS chip sewn into the drug bag... ugh... and it’s dozed with tracking-powder”

Nick nodded, dusting off his partner and picking up her over-sized taser: “Did you get a look at who zapped you?”

“No... I was talking to that gerbil girl – but she definitely saw my attacker, but I have no clue where she went” Judy said, trying to move and twist her shoulders and back around – her muscles felt so sore and stiff after the taser spasms.

Taping off the alley and returning to their van, the duo drove a block or so away until their radios came back on. Calling in what had happened, and adding that there was an active jamming device in the area, the alley was soon swarmed with CSIs and a crew of police technicians with radio detectors, looking for the jamming device.  
Going over the crime-scene with the head of the CSIs before signing the scene over, Nick and Judy wondered why the attacker hadn’t taken the jammer along after robbing Judy.

This discussion was quickly derailed, when another CSI came over with young female visibly shaken gerbil: “Cheese and crackers... you’re alive!”

Judy nodded, having more or less fully recovered from the tasing: “Pretty much – getting tazed like that isn’t fun, but normally it’s not lethal”

Nick signed off on the scene to the CSI so him and Judy could talk to the gerbil. The young lady had runny mascara seeping into the fur around her eyes: “Oh that’s great... but... wait, you a cop?”

“Pretty much – we were trying to lay a trap for the mammal that attacked me. Did you see who it was?” Judy explained, feeling that the lack a Gulp-O-Chino was making her somewhat tired.

The gerbil suddenly looked quite spooked: “Not really, it was a honey badger... a woman I think – pink mascare – but... am I going to be arrested now?”

“Why would we arrest you? You didn’t do anything” Nick quipped, trying to come off as comforting as possible to the tiny rodent.

The gerbil didn’t calm down much: “But I... I hit on you... “

“It’s not illegal to hit on a police officer – though when we’re on duty we’re not allowed to accept offers like that” Nick said with a smile, trying to defuse the situation with humor.

Judy shot Nick a dirty look: “You obviously didn’t hear what she wanted me to do” – the gerbil blushed furiously. 

“Nope – the jammer kicked in before that” Nick noted bluntly, feeling very much disappointed.

Looking down at the gerbil, Judy winked: “Well in that case her proposition stays between me and her”

The tiny gerbil looked incredibly relieved.

After getting the gerbil’s statement, and leaving a phone message for Sleeve about what had happened, Nick and Judy drove back to Precinct one, turned in the van, ditched their disguises and went home for greased up sexy times.


	7. Creeping Vinewoods

The next Monday morning, in the bullpen, Bogo had an update on the N2-robber:

“Alright, shut up! I have a report from the CSIs on Officer Hopps and Wilde’s sting operation last Saturday. They found fresh DNA from the same honey badger who raided the hamster gang, and the scent trail from the marker in the fake drugs that were stolen is still strong. Wolford, Fangmeyer, you are to assist Hopps and Wilde in tracking that trail to where the the drugs are stored” Bogo opened up with, wasting no time with petty niceties.

The officers in the bullpen nodded.

“I should not have to explain that I do not like the idea of someone trying to corner the market on N2. Every week there are more reports of N2 users showing up high in public and frightening innocent mammals. This Friday someone at a high school party spiked the punch with N2 – thankfully it became too diluted to do any real damage, but it was still a very serious drug-scare. This drug is on its way to becoming more popular than ‘nip, since nobody seems to understand how dangerous it is – and if that ends up being controlled by a single criminal organization, then the amount of money they stand to earn will make them very difficult to deal with” Bogo continued, sounding as grim and serious as possible.

After the rest of the morning briefing, Nick and Judy met up with Wolford and Fangmeyer. Nick squared up the two wolves: “Alright, ready to track our perp?”

Fangmeyer nodded: “You darn tooting – anyone who fries our favourite bunny needs to get busted”

“Alright – but before we go we should stock up on night-sticks, plus we’ll need to pick up Jack” Judy said, referring to the nighthowler-cure injectors and their secret celebrity observer.

The two wolves were aware of the observer that Nick and Judy had been lugging around for the last two or so weeks, though Miriam Fangmeyer did look a little apprehensive at the idea: “Hold on – this city-hall micromanager you’ve got tacked on, will he get in the way when we’re sniffing around?”

“No, he knows to stay back and just look – won’t be an issue – plus he’s really spooked about N2” Nick reassured.

A little later, in picking up Jack, the buck couldn’t help but notice that a second cruiser was following Nick and Judy’s: “Hey, what’s with number two?”

Filling Jack in on what had happened over the weekend, the actor once again cursed that he had missed out on all the excitement. Judy assured him that it wasn’t all that exciting getting tased.

“Right, but... the sting failed then? You didn’t catch the honey badger?” Jack pointed out, failing to see that the main point of the sting had been to lead them to the honey badger’s drug storage, not just capturing the honey badger. Judy quickly cleared that up.

At the alley next to the Cat’s Away club, behind the police tape, the hunt began: Wolford and Fangmeyer both accepted that they were going into the sewers fairly quickly, and Jack was very happy that Nick and Judy had brought an extra pair of bunny-sized rubber boots along, as well as gas-masks for everyone.

Trudging along in the sewers, Fangmeyer inquired into the GPS tracking device that was supposed to be in the drugs.

“The signal is all over the place – the chip can’t transmit through sewers like this, and where-ever it is right now it can’t be detected – so scent tracking is our only option right now” Nick said, trudging through the sewer pipe in his green wellingtons.

The scent-track through the sewer went on for quite a bit, but it cut right through the sewer stink, taking almost an hour before they reached an exit: A construction site.

“Ok... where are we?” Wolford wondered. Judy whipped out her phone and got a location ping, bringing up the Zoogle maps app.

With a mocking laugh, Judy showed the others where her phone said they were: “We’re at the Horns-Borough construction site – not exactly the place I ever thought we’d track a nighthowler thief to”

The others agreed, considering that the site had been in the works under Bellwether to become a huge savage mammal containment and research facility. For obvious reasons construction had shut down two years ago, right after Bellwether had been ousted, since funding for the place ended the moment that the nighthowler cure was discovered.

“Last I heard city hall still couldn’t agree on what to do with the place - I mean, they didn’t get around to building that much, just digging a big hole in the ground, so you can put anything here...” Fangmeyer commented in between of sniffing the air.

Judy nodded: “Right, and this is one of the few places we got a GPS hit – but the signal disappeared – so it must have gone underground again”

The scent led the five deeper into the construction site, further down into a pit that had been dug out for a basement.

“Damn, we must be at least four stories down by now” Fangmeyer noted, looking to the sky as the buildings around the construction site towered around them.

In the half dug-out pit the scent led them to an outcropping of old and broken concrete. There was a hole in it, leading into something. Nick and Judy peered into the darkness with an eerie sense of familiarity.

“What do you think this is? I mean, what could be this far down?” Wolford wondered, looking somewhat apprehensive about the size of the hole in the wall.

Judy looked at Nick, who nodded: “The old subway tunnels. The original nighthowler cooks had their drug lab in an old train cart in tunnels like these”

“Well that sure sounds promising – who wants to go in first?” Wolford said, sounding chipper in a very forced manner.

Judy went in first, being the smallest. It didn’t take long to clear out the hole enough for Wolford and Fangmeyer to fit through, and inside the scent trail was very easy to track, since there was barely anything else there of not to smell.

After two or so hours of tracking through seemingly endless tunnels, treading the thick dust thin and getting tangled in what felt like all the cobwebs, with rumbling bellies that yearned for the food up on the surface, the five were ready to give up. They had no clue where they were, let alone how to get back to the surface...

“Well that settles that – whoever took this route definitely wanted to give any pursuers the run-around” Wolford stated, sounding certain, hungry and annoyed. 

Marking their location and looking for an exit to the surface, the five mammals found themselves in a service tunnel that linked to the regular zootopia metro train network about an hour later. This led to an exit to the surface at Sousten station.

That it was raining didn’t help, or that it was almost three o’ clock.

Breaking for a quick and very late lunch, the group met up again half an hour later at the station. Going down into the tunnels, the hunt resumed, though Jack wasn’t all that enthusiastic: “Ok, it’s nice to get out of the rain, but we really need a way to keep track of where we are going down here... I do not want to spend another hour next time we have to go up”

“While that is a great idea, then aside from buying a sack full of red yarn and leaving a trail behind us back to this exit, then I don’t see how we can do that. GPS signals don’t work down there” Nick said, looking out under the awning of the Sousten metro station entrance.

Everyone else looked at Nick, who could only reply: “What?”

Jack pointed to a shop across the street: Miss Kitty’s Knitting Emporium.

A quick bit of shopping later, and the gang delved back into the depths while leaving behind a trail of multi-colored cotton yarn. Each of the five mammals carried a bag with several balls of tightly wound yarn, allowing for easy backtracking over quite a distance.

Picking up the trail of the scent once again, the five finally came to the end of the scent trail about an hour and a half later: A very robust and heavy steel door blocked their path – but it did not look old and abandoned like everything else down in the antiquated tunnels.

“This is triple rhino grade, Steel Lynx brand – we’re not getting in here” Nick quickly noted, spotting a dust-covered label and brushing it off, while the others searched the area by the light of their flashlights.

Judy, feeling no small amount of annoyed over the dead end: “Well that is just great... do any of you have a thermal lance?”

“Nope – but hey Nick, Sleeves said you might know this the honey badger we’re looking from? Is that true?” Wolford asked while poking around a pile of long-abandoned scrap.

Nick shrugged: “Do I know a honey badger? Yes, yes I do – but I don’t know if this is her. Hey Carrots, what are you doing?”

Judy was pressing her face sideways onto the ground: “I’m looking at the dust... it’s all wrong”

“What do you mean?” Fangmeyer wondered out loud, while looking more closely at the steel door.

The bunny scurried around on the ground: “We haven’t found any tracks in the dust down here – but the scent trail doesn’t lie – so where are the tracks?”

Nick had to admit that Judy had a great point. Jack clicked out his pen of might note-taking, looking eager to jot down their thoughts on the conundrum.

“Could our perp have dragged a brush or something behind himself, to remove his tracks? I see that all the time in Tundra Town” Wolford suggested.

Judy hmmm’d disapprovingly: “No, there’d be a big track in the dust – dust doesn’t behave like snow”

Nick knelt down and sighed, seeing how the dust was blown away a bit by his breath: “What about a leaft-blower? It would whirl up all the dust and erase any tracks, but leave a uniform dust layer afterwards”

The bunny doe got up and brushed off her uniform: “That would do it”

Jack wrote everything down, taking a few step backwards over to a pile of junk to get a better view of the whole scene, trying to imagine a honey badger with a leaf blower running through the tunnels, blowing up dust behind himself.

A click sounded.

“Jack. Don’t. Move” Nick said very urgently.

The buck’s nose quivered furiously, and his urge to simply leap away was very powerful: “Is it... a mine?”

Nick and Judy scrambled over to Jack, blowing away the dust around the buck’s feet.

“It’s just a button... you can step off it” Judy said, breathing a heavy sigh of relief.

As Savage got off the button, the steel door began to make noises: Internal mechanisms whirred, the door unlocking.

“A hidden floor switch – out of way, hidden in a pile of crap. Judy, get a picture of where it is so we can find it later” Nick said, looking towards the door.

Pictures taken, the five worked together to pull the heavy door open. The hinges squeaked and strained, revealing darkness as the door opened up.

“At least I don’t have to crawl on all fours to get in this time” Wolford noted, walking in casually, flashlight up in front.

The four on the other side of the door waited cautiously for a few moments.

Suddenly a burst of light erupted from the room beyond the door, and Wolford called out: “Found the light switch!”

With the light on, everyone entered. The nature of the place they were in became evident very quickly: A forklift among rows upon rows of boxes and sturdy metal shelves. This was some kind of warehouse.

Jack walked around the boxes and objects stashed on the shelves, quietly noting: “This looks familiar...”

The four officers didn’t really take notice of Jack’s musings as they had found a makeshift sleeping area. Sniffing the bedroll, Wolford confirmed: “A honey badger slept here – no doubt about that – we got her hideout!”

“Her?” Nick wondered.

Wolford pointed over to a small table with a mirror, small jars and make-up brushes strewn in front of the mirror. Nick nodded: “Ya ok - could be a cross-dresser”

“Or a trans-species nutball like that lioness” Judy noted, Nick shrugging and letting out a brief laugh.

Fangmeyer shook his head: “You two run into the strangest mammals”

“Hey, check this out” Nick called out, looking at a large bulletin board.

The board was covered in paper clippings and pinned notes, many of them connected with various colored bits of string. Jack came over: “Wow... that is so old-school”

“It’s a favorite among mammals too paranoid to keep their conspiracy notes on a computer” Nick said, noting several similarities in the board’s style compared to what he had seen his old honey badger acquaintance set up, especially since the make-up at the mirror looked like the same stuff she had used.

Pictures were taken to document the finding.

“Ok, we should give this to the CSIs – they’ll comb through this place. If the drugs are hidden here then we don’t have a chance in hell of finding it” Judy said, gazing up at the seemingly endless rows of shelves and the hundreds if not thousands of boxes and random junk stored on them.

“Oh right – the warehouse here... I think I’ve seen some of the things here before” Jack noted, walking over to what looked like a prefabricated segment of a house, with an empty door opening and window ‘hole’.

Looking around a bit, a large freight elevator was discovered. Thankful that they wouldn’t have to take their yarn trail back to Sousten station, they all got into the elevator and took it up to ground level.

As the doors opened, Jack instantly understood why he had felt familiar with the things he had seen down in the warehouse: It was set pieces.

They were in Vinewood.

Jack quickly felt the need to check his fur dye – it was still good. He did not want to be seen walking around with cops near the movie lots. Oh his PR manager would just kill him...

The five quickly noted down what warehouse they were at, and then made their way out of there. Sleeves could handle the warrants and CSIs to search the place – their work was done, at least for that day.

The rest of the week proceeded fairly uneventfully. Sleeves and a team of CSIs decended upon the Vinewood warehouse with great zeal and furious meticulous attention to detail, while Nick and Judy went back to their low-risk patrols with Jack – except on the Wednesday, when Jack was off to take his final helicopter pilot certification test.

It was wonderful to be able to respond to all the calls normally once more, to be properly on patrol – even if just for a day. It also meant bacon snacking in the cruiser again – and to Nick’s great joy he saw Judy get that predatory look in her eyes again while they were running down fleeing purse snatchers and other lowlife criminals.

On Thursday Jack was back during the morning briefing in the bullpen, looking pleased as punch, so the helicopter license exam had probably gone over quite well.

Bogo had as part of the morning briefing, an update from Sleeves about the N2 caper, along with the other cases that he felt everyone needed an update on. This was usually only if there was something about the case which might require assistance from other officers, or if there was something all officers had to be on the looking for. In this case it was the latter: “Ok you louts, the final case update this morning is about the N2 robber that Hopps, Wilde, Fangmeyer and Wolford tracked down the hideout of here Monday”

Polite cheers rang out in the bullpen, along with a hoot from Trunkaby.

“Sleeves and the CSIs have been going over the place with a fine toothed comb looking for the stolen drugs. Sadly, they simply weren’t there – despite checking every single crate and set-piece in the warehouse, the trail ended there” Bogo continued, sounding just a little annoyed – this usually meant that he had something to follow up with.

Everyone waited for Bogo to continue – the only sound was Jack scribbling notes.

Bogo drew in breath and flicked a remote to turn on the projector in the room, lighting up the projection screen next to him. The image was that of the bulletin board found in the warehouse, the conspiracy string map: “This was found in the hideout. It maps out the honey badger’s motivation for both stealing N2 and the stunt at the assisted living facility: There are printed out online articles and clippings from magazines about chem-trails, about the rising wave of N2 drug use in the city, and other conspiracy nonsense about how a shadowy ‘bah-ram-eve’ cabal is pumping us full of drugs, without us knowing it, to sedate and control us, and maybe to ultimately swap it all for N1 and wipe out the city. She’s looking to detox the city, the hard way”

Nick looked at Judy, then up at Bogo: “Did you get a positive ID of her?”

“Yes – after a fashion. Her employment record at the studio that owned the warehouse was filled out with a false identity and home address. Her checks have been given to her in person – she worked as a set and prop builder and warehouse manager, a perfect cover for her 'private projects' on the side” Bogo elaborated.

With a snap of the remote, the slide on display changed to display an ID card photo of a female honey badger. Nick groaned, it was Honey – no doubt about that. Judy perked up at Nick’s reaction: “You said she wanted to detox the city – how? Just by running around and stealing N2?”

“No, but I was about to get to that” Bogo said, noting that everyone was to be on the lookout for this honey badger. Another flick of the remote brought up what looked like professionally made pencil drawn schematics: “This is what was also found at the hideout. Schematics for rockets and and fluid-dispersal systems”

Hushed gasps and murmurs rang out through the bullpen.

Bogo cleared his throat: “The good news is that this is not what she is planning on making anymore – though with these rockets her idea was to rain down N2 all over the city, to shock us into quitting N2 use for good through mass public exposure to the drug”

The silence hung in the air heavily as the officers present digested that information. Wolford, somewhat reluctantly, asked: “So... if that’s not her plan anymore, what is it then?”

“Good question – we have no idea, but we suspect that she found an easier way of carrying out her plan. The schematics were found in the trash, but there was no sign on her bulletin board of having found something else to focus on. We suspect that she simply changed her mind on delivery system” Bogo explained, his tone grim and his eyes steely.

It went without saying that the arrest of this honey badger was priority number one. Jack and Judy were told to report to Sleeves, as they were now assigned t o him for the duration of the case.

After the rest of the briefing was over Nick and Judy met up with Sleeves and Jack in Sleeves’ office to talk about what was next.

“Is it your old friend?” Sleeves asked to Nick, knowing that the picture of the honey badger from the studio’s employment records had been shown at the bullpen briefing. 

Nick nodded, face expression pained: “It’s her – but she was never as much a friend as just another mammal I knew. She occasionally bought stuff from me, but that was about it”

“Do you have way to find her? Know anyone who can?” Sleeves asked, his tone calm and polite, not accusatory.

It was clear to everyone that finding an old friend or acquaintance because they had become a criminal was not a comfortable thing to do – but Nick seemed to take it in strides: “I’ll make a few calls, see if anyone knows anything – but I need to know, what is our time frame here? How much time do we have to find her before she makes a move?”

Sleeves gestured towards one the piles of reports: “The stuff we found on her bulletin board, and other scribbles in her hideout, talked about a ‘bah-ram-eve’ shadow cabal or something. She basically still thinks that Bellwether, or some secret sheep co-conspirators who worked with her, are still running things – basic conspiracy stuff – but from her bulletin board it seems that she wants to take out Bellwether first, to prevent her from rising to power again when she moves on to ‘purge’ the city”

“Right... but when it she going to do that?” Jack said, understandably worried.

The coati couldn’t really give an answer to that – there hadn’t been any writings about specific locations or dates. This only made it all the more important to catch her, and quickly.

Nick, Judy and Jack were thus sent off to have a poke at Nick’s old friends and contacts, while Sleeves would work the model rocket scene in Zootopia, to see if anyone knew of a honey badger: “If she ordered any kits or parts, that might give us a location on her. The warehouse was for sleeping and planning, not a workshop”

“Ok – wait, the chief said that her job had been as a prop maker? That would mean that she had a workshop in Vinewood” Jack pointed out, trying to think about why Honey had worked at Vinewood.

Sleeves that said him and the CSIs had checked that – but the prop workshops were very carefully monitored, to ensure that nobody stole anything or leaked information on upcoming movies. All Honey’s work there had been above board, though it had shown that she was very good at custom building small electronics and remote controlled machinery – skills needed to make model rockets.

“But... she’s not using model rockets, right? That’s what Bogo said” Judy said, sounding a little confused.

Sleeves shrugged: “With all due respect to Bogo, then I think he misread my report. The blueprints I found at the hideout had been discarded, yes – but that doesn’t mean that she hadn’t simply made better blueprints of rockets with N2-delivery systems. I still think she’s working on rockets, Bogo doesn’t – but he’s not the one helming this case, I am. The designs he showed you were early ones – she could simply have made new better ones”

Jack took careful notes about this little conflict in evidence interpretation.

Leaving in Nick and Judy’s cruiser, the trio headed out to try and talk up some Nick’s old friends. Jack was understandably curious about how Nick might have known Honey previously, but neither Nick or Judy were terribly interested in telling Jack about Nick’s somewhat shady past.

“Look, I used to run a small business that was part charity, where I sold random foodstuffs. Popsicles, and food that was over the last sell-by date, but was still edible, or food that shops didn’t want to sell anymore – like off-season howloween candy. Honey, being her paranoid self, didn’t trust buying groceries from regular shops – so she occasionally bought food from me, and would usually order other stuff while at it” Nick explained, taking care to word the description of his past in the most polite terms possible.

Jack nodded, looking really impressed with the concept: “Oh that’s really neat – I thought old food in the stores just got thrown out...”

“Most does – a lot of it ends up at bug feed up in the meadowland farms” Nick said, recalling how him and Finnick often had to ditch unsalable food up there too.

Judy checked the rear-view mirror, then took a left turn: “That’s how I met Nick – he had sold a popsicle to a missing mammal I was looking for, and that case ended up bringing down Bellwether – and if I’m not wrong then I impressed Nick enough that he chose to change career because of that”

“That is so cool” Jack said, taking several pages worth of notes.

Nick shrugged, glad that he was able to hide his expression behind his aviator shades: “Maybe... but when I left all that behind a lot of mammals considered a traitor for doing it – it’s complicated. It was a very insular community, and dealing in ‘old food’ is a bit of a legal grey area – so I really don’t think any of them will want to talk now that I’m a cop”

This turned out to be rather prophetic: The first couple of mammals that Nick leads the trio to wouldn’t talk at all, asking if they were under arrest. Suffice to say that Jack got some rather mixed messages about the kind of mammals that Nick had associated with.

After the first four the rest seemed to have disappeared completely, or hidden behind locked doors – almost as if someone had called around to warn everyone. Nick didn’t exactly feel the love.

Breaking for lunch, Judy tried to cheer Nick up. Jack wisely chose not to ask into why Nick had been so thoroughly shunned by his old acquaintances, but between the mammals that had asked if they were under arrest, and Nick having become a police officer, then the actor did gleam a inkling of what might have happened – at least to the extent that he chose not to pick at any old wounds of Nick’s.

While eating their veggie wraps, and Nick his cricket crunch wrap, on a bench near the wrap shop they had bought the food at, a rusty old van with a cheesy but awesome paint-job rolled up. A familiar looking fennec fox with black shades sat in the driver’s seat: “Hey officers, heard you’re looking for a honey badger”

Nick perked up, got up and approached the van: “Finnick, how’ve you been?” 

“Don’t – I can’t be seen with you and you know it. You’re looking for Honey, right?” Finnick replied, his voice betraying a thin layer of disgust hiding a suppressed urge to be kind to his old friend.

Nodding, Nick sighed and sat down again: “Guilty as charged. She’s been robbing N2 dealers all over the city – we think she’s gearing up to do something really stupid with it all...”

“Damn. Ok, you didn’t hear it from me, but I heard that someone – legit don’t know who – sold her two fifty-gallon drums of ‘second hand’ high octane jet or airplane fuel. That’s all I know” Finnick said quietly, his big ears flicking around to hear if anyone else was approaching into earshot.

Reporting their discovery in to Sleeves as Finnick left, the trio began to head back to precinct one. Enroute, Jack asks the obvious question: “Why would Honey want jet fuel if she’s building rockets”

“Because she ditched the rocket idea... the fuel is clearly for her new delivery system” Judy said, stating the equally obvious.

Puling on the things he had learned about aircraft during his helicopter pilot license training, Jack noted that two drums like that wouldn’t even be enough to refuel a small one-mammal jet aircraft, at least not one sized for a honey badger.

“What about model jets? Like model aircraft or drones? I’ve seen zootube vids of small drones dropping water balloons on random mammals, and model jets carrying stuff around too” Nick said, feeling all kinds of hyped up at his idea.

Judy and Jack both agreed: Model jet airplanes, probably with tweaked engines, modified to carry small payloads, could be flown all over the city... and buying a model jet kit was probably a lot easier than getting rocket parts.

This in turn raised the question of how to investigate the zootopian model jet-plane scene. Calling Sleeves and filling him in on the new line of thinking, he confirmed that it sounded like a good new direction for the investigation.

A few quick web-searches revealed that there were a little over a dozen model airplane clubs in the city, and almost twice that in stores that sold such kits, not counting the tons of online vendors. Considering that they did not know how much time they had, then the idea of getting warrants for that many different places to cough up their membership and client lists seemed very daunting.

“Plus, if Honey joined a club like that or bought jet-plane kits from one of those stores, then she no doubt did it under an alias. If she made her purchases online then we won’t even be able to tell that it was a honey badger who made the order” Nick noted, thinking about the practicalities of business documentation.

Suddenly, making a jittery motion in his seat - probably in an attempt to get up despite his seat-belt , Jack proclaimed: “I got it!”

Nick and Judy were all ears.

“Ok, so model jets big enough to carry anything useful will have to be fairly expensive, right?” Jack began, sounding really enthusiastic.

Nick nodded while Judy kept her attention on traffic: “Makes sense – but expensive high end stores tend to be even more tight-lipped about their clients”

“Exactly – because rich mammals and celebrities might be on their client list” Jack said, jiggling his eyebrows around quite conspicuously.

Neither Nick or Judy liked where this was going.

“...I can go undercover at these places – ask around. I can... what?” Jack said, seeing how the officers were looking at him.

Judy sighed: “Jack, I respect your enthusiasm, but civilians cannot go undercover for police – ever. That’s simply against the rules. Anything you find like that wouldn’t be admissible in court”

“Oh... ok – what if it’s not me finding the information?” the buck figured, giving Judy a look that reminded her just a little too much of Nick when he was being sly.

And so it came to pass that Jack called up his secretary, after the trio checked in with Sleeves and got his blessing: “Hey Many, a prop-maker from the studio got me curious about model jet airplanes. Looks fun. Didn’t say what place she bought hers from though, could you call around the shops and find out? Ya just namedrop me. Prop-maker is a honey badger, find out where she got hers”

“Do you randomly have your secretary do stuff like that often?” Nick wondered.

The actor twirled his phone around in a move he had learned for one of the spy thrillers he had starred in once: “Sure –everyone in Vinewood has some kind of weird hobby. The place attracts weirdos and has a surplus of mammals with money to burn. Beats blowing it on drugs and booze”

While waiting for a response from Jack’s secretary, the trio returned to their low-risk patrols. A call for a 3-458-A came in, a domestic disturbance with suspected male aggressor.

Driving over to that, Jack asked into the numbering system that the ZPD used.

“Well, the first number is size category. The two of us are category three and Nick is a four. The numbers in the middle refer to the law being violated, in this case paragraph 458. about domestic disturbances, and then the A is the sub-section specifying what’s going on, here that it’s one or more male mammals making trouble” Judy explained, as the cruiser pulled up to the curb of the house in question.

The disturbance report turns out to be a false alarm, a very frustrated moose bull had gotten a bit loud while trying to ‘fix’ a broken lawn mower, which had only broken it even more.

Returning to their patrol route, Jack’s secretary called back: None of the stores that sold model jet-plane had any honey badgers for clients. This put a damper on the trio’s collective mood, as well as Sleeves after they called their discovery in.

“Damn, here I thought we had her figured out” Jack lamented, pouting in a way that only rich spoiled mammals could.

Nick shrugged and checked the cruiser’s computer for any new email – there weren’t any: “If it’s any consolation then figuring out what a paranoid mammal is going to do next can be really hard”

“Oh please. Between the directors in Vinewood alone there are at least half a dozen paranoid, crazy or delusional mammals – Honey thinking that there who believed in some sheep conspiracy to drug the city is the least of the crazy I’ve seen in there” Jack said, sounding distinctly as if he had experienced working with some of these crazy mammals.

Did this sound even mildly interesting and relevant to the case? Why yes it did!

“So the reason we didn’t get any hits with the model jet stores... Honey might have had a co-conspirator” Judy figured.

Nick agreed: “That might explain why she even got a job there to begin with. If she was just looking to earn money for her projects she could stick to selling her inventions on flea-bay. Let’s call this in and go to it”

To get a full low-down on who was into what kind of non-sense in Vinewood, Jack pulled on an old contact: A tabloid journalist who specialized in Vinewood gossip.

“Say, if there are so many mammals doing crazy things in Vinewood – what’s your flavour of crazy?” Judy asked jokingly.

Jack’s expression instantly switched to one that did not look amused: “That’s none of your business”

Nick and Judy both laughed, both of them chiding the actor with humorous guesses at what the buck might be into.


	8. Too Hot to Handle

“Maybe he unzips his bunny suit and three mice jump out?” Nick joked.

Judy chuckled a bit as she focused on driving: “No, he probably just likes to wear clothes made out of fruit and vegetables! Real banana hammocks”

Jack was not amused, but seemed to take the ribbing with stoic and stiff upper lip: “Are you two done yet?”

The meeting that Jack set up with a tabloid journalist was to take place at a coffee-shop overlooking the main entrance into Vinewood. Before going there the trio switched back into civilian duds, though Jack didn’t do anything about his brown fur-dye.

A little due diligence on Nick and Judy’s part also confirmed that this was a meeting that Jack had to do alone: The journalist in question has been on ZPD’s blacklist for years due to repeated breaches of publication bans on both various suspects and trial victims for all sorts of celebrity-related criminal cases.

One thing Nick and Judy did set up was equipping Jack with a microphone: “Come on – we can put it under your shirt collar”

“Oh wow... this is tiny – you could fit this anywhere” Jack said, sounding as giddy as school-girl that he was getting try some of the fun police toys.

Nick shook his head: Jack had been very insistent that he carry a wire – to the point that both Nick and Judy suspected that it had been on Jack’s “stuff I want to do as a pretend cop” list.

As Jack sauntered into the coffee-shop, leaving Nick and Judy in the civilian-looking police car they had checked out of the motor pool and parked in one of the outer Vinewood parking lots, the duo talked about exactly who and what Jack was meeting.

“I mean, I get that the guy’s name was on the no-comment list, but it didn’t say what species he is” Judy noted, sipping on her Gulp-O-Chino.

Nick fiddled with his aviator shades: “I think he’s a cat of some kind – the pen name is a bit of a give-away – but I didn’t know that his full name was Jimmy ‘Top Cat’ Whiskershins”

“Well, with a last name like that I would have picked a pen name too” Judy noted, taking another sip from her Gulp-O-Chino.

To the fox, then the visage of Judy sitting with a cup of coffee roughly the size of herself, wasn’t just funny – it was hilarious – but he knew well enough not to poke too much fun at her: “Say... that there is, what? Your fifth Gulp-O-Chino this week. You sure you’re not developing an addition?”

“I can quit any time I want – and in an emergency I can dive into this thing in case of hypothermia, or if I need to hide” Judy expressed, her steely conviction making her sound far too serious.

It was difficult for Nick not to laugh – but that was when Jack’s bug picked up: The meeting had begun.

Most of the pleasantries exchanged by Jack and “TC” weren’t of any interest to neither Nick or Judy, but after Jack had spent about twenty minutes talking about who he had seen drunkenly making out at the howleween party he had been at, then TC divulged on what he knew about conspiracy-savvy Vinewood regulars.

“Ok, you know Karen Oris, the hippo mockumentary maker? She’s been asking for sheep who’re into conspiracies... not exactly what you asked for, but maybe you could look into who she’s been interviewing”

Well that was one possibility, even if only tangentially related.

“Sven Elkson was shopping around last week for another new age cult to join – anything to validate his love of psychedelic drugs. You can get him to support or fund anything out of pocket if you catch him while he’s stoned out of his mind – he’d be a perfect patsy if someone was looking to fund something shady”

Another maybe – didn’t this guy have anything good?

“Right, ok – this guy is actually interesting: Old Jakob ‘no pants’ Skvisen, the old producer, he’s been off his meds for at least a few months last I heard – you know how he gets when that happens... oh you liked that? Great – just remember me next time you hear something juicy, ok?”

Jack emerged from the coffee shop a few moments later.

After having crossed the streets and entered Vinewood, the actor rejoined Nick and Judy, who looked somewhat puzzled.

Some explanation was in order, and Savage was happy to oblige: “Ok, Skvisen... I’m not surprised that you haven’t heard of him – he was big about forty years ago, made oodles of money and used some of that to help finance Vinewood’s last major expansion. He basically owns part of the place”

“Ok, that gives him the pull to get someone like Honey hired without background checks – but how does he fit into the conspiracy nonsense?” Nick wondered.

Jack strapped himself into the seatbelt: “Oh that’s easy: About twenty years ago he started getting really paranoid – like, really paranoid. He made an absolute fool of himself, and was basically forced to unofficially retire and just play pretend that he has any real power... but he’s still absolutely loaded, and if he’s off his meds, then there’s no limit to the paranoid conspiracies he’ll buy into”

A little more investigation into the goat back at precinct one confirmed at least part of the story, the news archive revealing a few articles about how the goat had made enough hundreds of millions to make any further ‘counting’ of his wealth somewhat unnecessary – and another article about how the goat had been found barricaded in his penthouse suite, thinking that the hippos were going to sit on him – apparently his paranoia centred around large mammals and a fear being stepped or sat on. The scandal had forced him out of a lot of board rooms and into a lot of therapy.

Sleeves certainly found the information interesting, especially since Skvisen currently worked as a producer – basically the mammal who signs all the checks that a director spends during a movie production, which would give him ample cover to funnel money into shady dealings.

Still, that was not proof of guilt. What was more promising was when they matched up Honey’s work schedule the studios had given them to Skvisen’s production schedule – there was a lot of overlap, and a number of meetings. In fact, there were a couple meetings too many to go unnoticed. Checking Skvisen’s production budgets for the last six months also revealed some very generous prop budgets – and while that wasn’t abnormal for some movies – then it certainly wasn’t if one of those movies was an animated features. That was more than enough for Sleeves to get a warrant, but the coati didn’t just want to barge into the old goat’s office... mainly because they had no clue what to even look for, and the studio would be able to drown them in lawyers if they just walked in waving a warrant.

To this Jack had more relevant information: “Ok, check it – aside from being paranoid when not on his meds, then Skvisen is known for two things: First up he hates modern technology. His secretary prints out all his emails and puts them in a big scrap-book that he reads them in. He writes his reply and then his secretary types them in. Makes him notoriously slow to respond to emails, but surprisingly quick if you write him a letter”

“Couldn’t that be a part of his paranoia? We had a fence we busted a while ago who printed out all his emails and only used burner accounts to avoid leaving a digital paper-trail” Judy quickly noted.

The actor hadn’t really considered that angle, agreeing that the technophobia might simply be a result of the paranoia: “Maybe?”

This lefts the final detail, which Sleeves looked very curious about: “Ok, and what was the other thing?”

Jack threw a brief glance at Nick that confused the tod: It wasn’t a sorry look, but it did appear to somehow signal worry or discomfort – except Jack had also a bit of a cruel grin on at the same time: “ok, there’s one other thing: Skvisen is known as Jakob ‘no pants’ Skvisen for a reason. He is a horny old goat, with a preference for ladies with mostly red or russet fur…”

Nick did not like the sound of that.

“So... red pandas, weasels and... vixens?” Judy said, looking at Nick.

Jack nodded: “And the best part is that with foxes, then tods and vixens don’t have that much immediate sexual dimorphism, at least not any more than what we can make up for with a few fake eyelashes – Skvisen’s poor vision should cover the rest”

“I’ll bring my make-up kit” Judy noted, smiling far too much at Nick.

Nick did not like the look of that.

On the next Friday, just around noon, Nick stepped out of a rented limo into partially cloudy weather. The high heels he was wearing hurt, and the dress he was wearing was somehow at the same time classy and very slutty – it certainly made him feel like a really high priced escort – and the glued on eyelash extensions he had on felt weird.

That Skvisen had bad enough eyesight that supposedly wouldn’t be able to tell the difference between Nick and a vixen didn’t really comfort him. The giggles and laughs in his ear from the hidden earpiece didn’t help either – he was quite certain that Judy and Jack were sitting somewhere out of sight taking pictures of him.

The timing had been perfect: Skvisen exited the diner barely thirty seconds after Nick had gotten into position in front of the limo.

“Ooh...” the old goat said, adjusting his glasses and gripping his cane tight, looking very much as if his he also wanted to grip his ‘other’ cane now that he was at it.  
Nick drew one final breath and recalled all the fun things Judy had promised him in return for doing this – then waved at Skvisen, his bright red painted claws glinting ever so slightly in the noonday sun.

It was difficult to tell if the goat was just horny enough to not care, or if he was somehow used to having random prostitutes and limos put in front of him – maybe it was both? Either way Skvisen approached and got in along with Nick without asking questions.

“Driver, home!” the billy-goat barked, trying to get comfy in the rich lizard-hide seats.

To Nick’s surprise – and worry – then Skvisen didn’t try any funny business, well not at first. It wasn’t a long drive, but about two thirds there the goat did sneak a hoof over onto Nick’s... shoulder? Really? Was he that visually impaired? Or maybe he was just really old-fashioned?

“Oh Red, so beefy – I’ll bet you have a good swing. Love it when they get that right” Jakob said, confusing Nick to no end.

That was when the goat kicked off his pants and started touching himself.

Now, Nick had witnessed many things in his life – but seeing a geriatric goat pleasure himself had not been one of those things, nor was it on his list. Even after having seen the goat warm himself up, Nick wished that he had not seen it. This was going to require a lot of sipping bleach to purge the experience from his mind.

The limo drove into the parking garage under Skvisen Tower in Vinewood, one of the biggest office buildings in the movie studio district. 

Taking a private elevator up to Skvisen’s penthouse apartment and office, the goat finally started getting grabby: “Come on... show me what you got Red”  
Nick, operating on instructions to ‘play along’ until they got to the goat’s apartment, had precious little experience to draw on for how to deal with the situation. Oh sure, he had experienced plenty of drunk or rowdy mammals at bars and clubs. Some had even tried to hit on him, or hit him – but this was the first time when Nick couldn’t really just say.

Drawing on one thing Nick knew for certain from his hustling days, Nick decided to take charge of the situation: Nothing could blow a hustle faster than the mark pulling a fast one – but if Nick was the one making the moves, then Skvisen would hopefully be none the wiser.

On the downside this meant fondling the goat. That had not been something Nick had imagined he’d ever have to do, ever, as a police officer – but ok... first time for everything – and the goat turned out to be very receptive to having his horns fondled... a little too fond if judging by his erection.

As they reached the top floor and the door opened, Nick instantly asked if they couldn’t have a little drink – he really needed something to empty the tranq dart he had in his purse into.

“Why of course, then I will show where we shall have our fun” the goat said, walking into his luxurious apartment.

The walls were lined with framed photos from old movies, framed newspaper articles that contained reviews of movies that Skvisen had been part of making, and various movie memorabilia in glass cases. It was a glorious museum to the art of film and the moving picture, somewhat marred by the pants-less and very exited goat working the minibar.

“What can I make for you darling? Skvisen asked, looking at his very impressive collection of alcohol. There was booze on display older that Zootopia itself...

Nick didn’t dare ask for anything fancy – he was supposed to be an expensive prostitute, not a sommelier – so he used the ‘girlie voice’ that Jack had taught him and said: “Whatever you’re having”

It was strange hearing his own voice sound so feminine – and to that he had to give Savage credit: That bunny knew how to work the mammal body when you had to act like something you weren’t.

It didn’t take long for the goat to spin around, dick a-flailing, presenting Nick with not just one but two glasses: “Here, take ‘em – I’ll open up the fun cave”

Oh this Nick just had to see... right after dosing the goat’s drink.

Skvisen sauntered over to a large wall to wall bookshelf and pulled a book. There was a click – and like a cheesy spy movie, then a whole section of the bookshelf pulled back and then slid to the side, revealing a hidden room...

It was a hidden room full of torture-device looking machines. One even had the label “Spank-O-Tron 3000” and looked like a windmill with paddles. As far as Nick was concerned, then the room was made of nope!

Nick was so close to just turning tail and running away when Skvisen charged into the room and jumped up onto a table with straps, shouting: “Come on, let’s get this show on the road! Strap me in Red!”

Nick’s conflicting emotions stilled, replaced with an urge to laugh like a cheesy spy movie villain: “Oh no, you haven’t even had your drink – I may have to punish you for that”

“Whoopie! Well gimme – oh yes, I have been a very naughty billy-goat” Skvisen explained, enthusiastically gesturing Nick to fork over the drink.  
Giving the goat the dosed drink, Nick wondered how much the stuff would take to kick in – or if it even worked if ingested, as opposed to being injected. Oh well, worst come to worst he had two backup darts he could just use once Skvisen was strapped in.

Jakob stripped down with impressive speed, leaving Nick to strap the naked goat in while trying to not smirk or grin – it helped thinking of how panicked and properly screwed the goat would be once Nick made off with his printed out emails. With such thoughts in mind, Nick was able to maintain an appearance of aloof malice – the perfect look for a dominatrix with horribly fake eyelashes.

It wasn’t because the goat resisted being tied up, making the process take more time, but by the time Nick had gotten to the padded leather strap that was supposed to go around Skvisen’s neck then the goat was snoring loudly.

Taking a few steps back, Nick very briefly considered spiking all the goat’s lube with chilli oil – but he shook the thought just as fast: “He would probably just like that...”

Leaving the ‘fun cave’, Nick took off the high heels and put them in his purse. Looking around, Nick sought out the goat’s office, which turned out to be on the west side of the building – the penthouse apartment took up the entire floor!

The ledger with printed out emails was right smack dab in the centre of the goat’s very large polished oak desk. It was also a massive tome that looked more like an old movie prop than anything else – oh and it appeared to be almost as big as Nick, certainly just as heavy. This made the tome very not fun to manoeuvre back to the elevator. Getting it down onto the goat’s wheeled office chair did make things a little easier, but the poor chair creaked and groaned under the weight as if it was going to collapse any second.

To Nick’s surprise and annoyance then there were two elevators he could choose between for going down. Too bad he couldn’t remember which he had come up via – but it turned out to be a moot point: One of them was locked.

Taking the one available elevator down, Nick wondered how the hell he was going to sneak the massive tome out of the building. The thought of changing back into his police uniform – which was neatly and very tightly packed into his purse – did cross his mind, but that would make it obvious to Skvisen who had taken the tome – and Sleeves had been very much against that, as it might result in other evidence being destroyed in some panic to cover up Skvisen’s involvement with Honey.

Considering his options, Nick checked out the digital display that listed all the floors on his way down. He knew that with it being Friday afternoon, then there wouldn’t hopefully be too many mammals still at work – but then again, this was Vinewood, and he had no clue if there was such a thing as ‘crunch time’ for movie productions.

Ok, looking at the floor list, Nick did see one floor where he knew there wouldn’t be anyone: The fifth floor – it was marked as Service and utilities. That meant cleaning mammals and janitors – which meant carts and other things to wheel crap around in, such as a big ass tome full of glued on printed out emails – and cleaning and stuff was usually always done in the morning before office workers would come in, or in the evening when they were gone.

Stopping at the fifth floor, Nick quickly found what he was looking for – a lone janitor’s wheelie bin. The tome could just barely fit into it, but it worked. A locker room nearby provided a spare janitor uniform that fit him, and thus Nick was off to the ground floor.

Hauling the very heavy wheelie bin towards the front door, Nick was spotted by what appeared to be the two only mammals at work that day: A bored hare with glasses sitting at the front desk, and a bison security guard who looked less bored and more annoyed to be working on a Friday afternoon.

“Hey you, you’re supposed to use the service entrance – you know that, right? – and what are you even doing here this late?” the hare called out, looking briefly startled that there were anyone else in the building.

The bison just looked up, saw that Nick was wearing a janitor’s uniform, then looked back down at whatever his smartphone was streaming.  
Bored and skittish desk-meat? Oh, this was Nick’s favourite.

“Hey I was just called in to fetch something and get it to the incinerator for the big guy upstairs before I go home for the day – plus its Friday, this is a little faster, and I’ve been here since five” Nick said, trying to match the bison’s ‘I do not want to be here, but it’s my job’ expression, along with a matching tone of voice.

The hare looked at Nick. The fox knew that his lie had been a gamble – but if Skvisen had a habit of collecting emails like this, and was as paranoid as Jack said, then he probably didn’t keep these tomes. No, they would be destroyed when full to erase any evidence.

“Right, just don’t leave any marks on the floor” the hare said dismissively, equal parts disappointed that Nick’s appearance wasn’t enough to break his tedium and happy that Nick’s appearance wasn’t anything bad.

Walking out with the wheelie bin, Nick took a sharp left and found a nice little alley to hide in. Calling Judy for a pickup, she arrived moments later with Jack. Between the three they somewhat easily got the tome into the trunk – they all agreed that they would get someone bigger to bring to the tome to Sleeves’ office.  
Getting Clawhauser’s help to carry the big tome – which looked much smaller when the fat cheetah carried it – the trio spent the rest of the Friday afternoon digging into the tome.

Ok, looking at the first pages in the tome then the emails in it reached back four months. According to Honey’s employment record at Skvisen’s studio, then she had been working there for six months – so the email printouts didn’t reveal how Honey and the goat had first started talking conspiracy stuff, but it did contain all the information that Nick, Judy and Sleeves had been looking for:

“Check this out – both Skvisen and Honey are talking about the rocket idea as Skvisen’s plan” Nick said, pointing to a printout in the tome.  
One issue that was quickly found with the tome system was that it didn’t really contain the emails that Skvisen had sent in reply to anyone – though in some of the printouts then the emails sent to Skvisen contained the original email he had sent, via his secretary, to the mammal that had then emailed him back.  
It was in one such email from Honey, that an older email dating back further than the tome really covered, referenced something interested: “Hey – here Skvisen wrote that he was inspired to do start this project by some a mammal he just calls ‘a loyal fan’ – he wrote that almost six months ago” Judy read, looking for other references to the loyal fan.

“Wait, you mean someone else put the goat up to this? Just how many layers are there to unravel here?” Sleeves bemoaned, already imagining how bothersome it would be keep track of all of this.

The mail mentioning the loyal fan painted a picture of a ‘warning’ Skvisen had gotten, that the new N2 drug was far more dangerous than N1 – which had apparently been the focus of his original schemes with Honey – because now mammals were taking nighthowler-drugs willingly. Skvisen thought, just like Honey’s writings had indicated, that it was some kind of sheep cabal planning to addict the city to N2 and then maybe pull a switcheroo with N1 to kill everyone – not that it made any sense why anyone would want to do that, but such was the nature of paranoid delusions.

In Honey’s email reply to that, Honey had speculated that the sheep cabal might be Bellwhether’s attempt to get revenge on the city. That explained why Honey had considered the eve a priority target.

The latest emails in the tome was an exchange between Honey and Skvisen, talking about Honey’s lair having been discovered.

Back on Monday right around the time Nick, Judy, Jack, Wolford and Fangmeyer had been trying to get in via the fortified steel door Honey had written: “Motion sensors in my den just tripped outside the tunnel door. Fuck! Going into hiding for a while” 

The really interesting part was Skvisen’s response: “Don’t you dare abandon the project now – come to my penthouse. My lawyers will keep you out of jail”  
To this Honey had written: “No way – the studio won’t let you do that. They always cooperate with the cops”

The goat had not taken kindly to this – having tried to order Honey to comply with his orders – but Honey had taken that as a threat, thinking that Skvisen had set her up and was trying to frame her for ‘the project’.

The last email from Honey had tiny handwritten notes on it from Skvisen, mocking the email: “You have everything you need. I’m just a liability now – and a scapegoat from how you’re sounding, and I didn’t sign up for that. Bye bye” with the goat having written “The bah-ram-eve cabal got to her!” with a blue pen at the bottom the printout.

Sleeves looked very pensive as he mulled over the email exchange: “You know... I find it a little suspicious, a little too good to be true – Judy, do you think this exchange could be fake? You know, to make us stop investigating Honey?”

Both Nick and Judy found that Sleeves’ idea interesting – but Nick was sceptical: “I think it’s real. This big book, and Honey’s hideout, none of those places were meant to be discovered”

“I get what you mean – but we need to verify this. I’ll spend this weekend going through the book, trying to spot if there are any other emails that look like decoys, and on Monday we can talk with Vinewood security to get an idea of when Honey was last there to confirm if she’s gone into hiding” The coati said, looking intently at the printouts.

Jack, having barely been able to keep up with his note-taking due to all the interesting things the emails had revealed, asked: “So... are you going to arrest Skvisen?”  
That was a good question. Nick and Judy looked to Sleeves, who in turn shrugged: “Maybe. If Honey’s email is right then the goat already has all he needs to start whatever it is they’ve planned to do – but I doubt the goat is going to pull the trigger himself. That means that there are others involved, so locking up Skvisen might not do much. Maybe that’s why he still thinks he needs Honey?”

Jack looked pleased as punch that he had helped the investigation along.

Retiring for the weekend, Nick and Judy returned home – Nick eager to restore his proper sense of manhood after all the humiliation he had experienced with Skvisen. Judy promised lots of help.

At the apartment building where they lived, right on the edge of the old Happytown neighbourhood, things looked just as it always had. The shops were closing up, the bars were advertising happy hour, and all kinds of mammals were walking and driving around, going home for the evening.

In the stairwell up to their apartment, Judy once again briefly wondered how Nick had ever acquired such a nice place to live. Sure, it was very close to Happytown, and nobody really wanted to live there, but the building they were in wasn’t rundown or dilapidated at all. Sure, the naked concrete walls in the stairwell weren’t exactly interesting to look at, but there weren’t any issues with the place, no bad smells or trash anywhere.

The duo’s Saturday was spent doing a little cleaning, a lot of fooling around, and watching some hilariously bad movies – like Cattlefield Earth. They both agreed that whoever had written that crap was in dire need of a writing course, and maybe an hour with the spank-o-matic 3000 as punishment. Oh those silly Psycow aliens.

That evening the couple enjoyed a lovely homecooked dinner, a bottle of very good wine, which led to a lot of sticky love-making. They both fell asleep in each other’s arms, looking forward to a shared Sunday morning shower, which they would most likely be in dire need of at that point.

The sound of glass shattering and water splashing over their bed was not how Nick and Judy had expected to wake – then again, it turned out to be three in the morning.

Scrambling out of bed, away from the glass-shard-covered bed, Judy shouted: “Nick!”

The tod had been just a second or so slower than Judy to get out of the bed – but as he got out, the two saw the flickering lights outside: Fire.

Peeking out of the broken bedroom window, Nick confirmed: “Well that’s not good...”

“What is it?” Judy said, her voice trembling and her heart racing.

Nick gave Judy a frightened look: “It looks like the entire ground floor is burning – up the fire escape too”

“Well we’re not going out that way!” Judy very quickly stated, running out into the living room, to the front door of the apartment.

The sturdy reinforced steel door, installed a long time ago when Nick had ‘acquired’ the apartment and ever so slightly fortified it to protect from any ‘unhappy clients’ Nick might run into, was glowing... as in, it was really damn hot.

“Sweet cheese and crackers... we’re trapped” Judy said, her voice somehow ‘collapsing’ as she spoke, despair setting in.

Nick looked around at the apartment, and at the door. Damn thing had an air-tight seal... no smoke was coming in – which also meant that their fire alarm hadn’t gone off. Shouldn’t there had been a building-wide fire alarm?

“Nick...” Judy said, slowly walking up to him and grabbing hold of him tight.

Gently stroking her head and ears, Nick looked down at his girlfriend – it was a tender, and terrifying moment.

“You shouldn’t happen to have a secret escape-door or tunnel out of here? Or an extra large mammal toilet we can flush ourselves in again?” Judy asked, her voice calm but her tone was pleading and panicky, like an addict ‘politely’ asking for more drugs.

Closing his eyes for a moment and thinking, Nick shook his head: “We’re on the fourth floor, so no tunnels – and the toilet we have here is fox-size... you wouldn’t even fit – and the fire escape out the bedroom window was supposed to be an escape route”

Judy’s grip tightened around Nick’s waist. Nick in turn held the bunny tighter.

“Hey, anyone in there?” a voice called out, from the bedroom.

It was a beaver at the end of an extended fire-truck ladder, just outside their window.

A few minutes later, down on the street, the fire of the building was fully visible: The ground floor was ablaze, and further up on the top floor, the fourth floor, the hallway window was billowing smoke and flame.

Now, the good news was that the ground floor fire was largely under control – and had been caught in just enough time that it didn’t look to be compromising the structural integrity of the building. Also, with the access point the fire fighters now had via Nick and Judy’s bedroom window, they were now able to go in and effectively fight the fire in hallway.

Tired, and coming off their adrenaline highs, the duo opted to hightail it to precinct one. There were rooms where they could crash for the night – and it didn’t look like their apartment would become safe or available to be for the rest of the night.

However, whatever cruel gods that had smiled upon the fox and bunny had no lifted their curse just yet: The two just barely managed to wave at the stag sitting in the reception booth for the night shift, when an alarm sounded...

“Carrots... that doesn’t sound like a regular fire alarm” Nick noted, yawning and finding it somewhat difficult to get riled up by the strange whooping noise.  
Judy listened for a few seconds, before she recognized the pattern – but the stag at the front desk beat her to an explanation, having grabbed the mike to the precinct-wide PA and intercom system: “This is a bomb alarm folks! Everyone file out of the building in an orderly fashion – no stampeding or trampling, keep this civil, but stop whatever you’re doing and get out – be sure to check the nap rooms for anyone asleep!”

So much for getting any sleep. At least they were just at the entrance, so the two just had to turn around and walk out the door.

Outside precinct one, as the fifty or so mammals present for the night shift shuffled out of the building, Nick and Judy made small talk with the night shift mammals. There were a few lab rats who had been working overtime, a dozen or so patrol officers waiting around for dispatch orders, plus two dozen mammals from the holding cells – some of them were rather vocal in their displeasure of being woken up and pulled out of their cells.

On the plus side, then you could barely even hear the alarm from inside when standing outside, and someone had raided the break room on the way out, so there were pitchers of coffee aplenty, as well as most of Clawhauser’s donut stash for all to dig into. Couldn’t let it spoil, right?

Bogo arrived fifteen minutes later, wearing naught but a ZPD jacket over his pajamas, along with a bomb squad: “Alright – mailroom is on sub-level one, go!”

The bombsquad hurried inside, apparently to the mailroom, while Bogo looked pissed in the late breeze.

Spotting Nick and Judy, the chief had to ask what they were doing there: “Shouldn’t you two be home and asleep?”

“Apartment building caught fire, came here to sleep” Nick said without mirth in his voice, having little to no energy left to draw from. Judy nodded, looking just as non-plussed and petered out. It didn’t help that both of them were wearing the dirty clothes they had worn during the day, on top of the by now only slightly sticky mess that their fur was after their evening of bedroom amusement.

Instead of saying anything directly to the two, Bogo suddenly looked distracted, reaching for his phone: “What? Fire-alarm? Can you find what set it off? No there should be a monitor on your level, check the security station”

A few moments passed, Bogo holding the phone to his ear. Nick and Judy could both see that Bogo’s expression was much more anxious than angry – something was bothering him, and not in the angry way, but in the bad way. It was then that he got the message over the phone: “Second level? That’s offices – can you send someone up to check? Ok, you wrap up and get that thing over to the CSI lab”

Putting the phone down, Bogo hollered a brief shout to get everyone’s attention: “The bomb has been disarmed, but a fire-alarm has gone off on the second floor – anyone awake enough to run up and check what it is?”

The stag who had sat at the front desk put down the pitcher of coffee he had been chugging: “I’ll go”

“Good – I’ll be on frequency six, hop to it” Bogo said, sounding very much as if he did not need a fire on top of the bomb in the mailroom.  
The stag disappeared into the precinct. A minute or so later Bogo got something on his radio – as did everyone else who was tuned into frequency six, because why not: “Yup, got an officer up in flames here – I think someone knocked over a candle when they left for the bomb evac”

“Amazing” Bogo deadpanned: “Can you put it out?”

“No, this is more than I can handle with an extinguisher – has anyone called the fire department?” the stag said over the radio.

It turned out that the fire alarm had automatically summoned a firetruck, and so the fire was quickly put out and everyone was allowed back into the precinct. Again some of the mammals that had been arrested and had been held in the holding cells complained, a few of the cheekier ones suggesting that they just be let go, seeing as they had already sort of been let out. Bogo’s glare of ultimate doom and ‘I am not in the mood for that kind of lip at three in the morning’ silenced all such cheek.

Nick and Judy managed to get some much needed sleep in one of the nap rooms, before heading back to their apartment the next day... which was done with great trepidation.


	9. Hiding in Plain Sight

The completely burnt out storefronts on the street level of the apartment building made for an ominous sight. The burnt out husks of slag, melted plastic and ashen bits of wood looked wretched and miserable – and there were already several store-owners and employees milling about outside the police tape put up around the place. They didn’t exactly look happy – some of them sounded as if they hadn’t insured against fire.

All of this displeased Judy, for the lack of a better word, as she was still too emotionally tired to get really upset: “Oh now where am I going to my groceries...”

“I can see three other grocery stores from where I’m standing Carrots – we’ll live” Nick mused, similarly spent, but taller and looking down the street.  
The stairwell up their apartment was... well it was concrete and steel, but it had still been exposed to the head of the fire, and been hosed down in kind, so it had a lovely slippery coating of moist soot and ash, and was a little bit warped.

The hallway outside their apartment was in far worse shape: It looked like the ground floor shops, if not worse – the fire in the hall had been able to rage for far longer before the firefighters got to it, and the wooden floor and ceiling panels had fuelled it quite nicely. It also made it pretty much impossible to get to the front door of the apartment, since the floor had been burnt away to the point that there wasn’t any left... just holes to fall into, and neither of the two wanted to visit the third floor hallway that much. On the plus side this meant that the front door having been left ajar by the firefighters hadn’t resulted in any burglaries.

This resulted in a trip up the fire escape. Just like the stairwell stairs, then the steel emergency fire escape had some nifty moist ash and soot coated patches, especially around the ground level and first floor, but it was still possible to get up to the fourth floor windows. 

Aside from the quite thoroughly busted bedroom window, which had been completely wrecked after half a dozen fire fighters had climbed in through in full kit, and the quite thoroughly water-logged carpeting that had come from the same firefighters having hosed down the red-hot front door, then very little had been truly damaged in the apartment. This was nice, but the apartment itself was still a mess: The water blasted on the door had splashed everywhere, so nearly everything was still wet or moist – and not everything in the apartment had benefited equally from that. At least the house plants had been watered.

The front door was not happy about being closed – Nick suspected that the hinges had warped due to the heat – but they did manage to lock it up again. The two figured that they’d unlock it once the hallway was fixed.

“Oh Nick – look at the bedsheets. The glass shards. I’ll go out and get us some new sheets – you start cataloguing what’s been damaged and what’s ok. I’ll bring us some breakfast too” Judy said, sounding so very much as if she just did not want to spend her Sunday morning filling out insurance claims.

She was out the window and down the fire escape before Nick could object. Looking around, Nick sighed deeply and wryly, opening the spreadsheet app on his phone and preparing to make a list.

That was when Judy got a phonecall from Bogo, but she had left her phone behind at the apartment. She put him on speakerphone: “Hey Chief, why the call?”  
“Do I need an excuse to check in on two of my officers when someone tries to burn down the building they live in?” Bogo said.

Nick found this difficult to believe, looking at the soot on the ceiling, then back at the phone. He quickly asked: “You think it was arson here?”

“I don’t think – I know. I just got the report from the fire investigator from last night. The only things lit on fire was your fire escape, your hallway, your stairwell and the storefronts, which we think was meant as a diversion – just like the bomb” Bogo stated in a calm but audibly annoyed tone.

It turned out that the office that had burned down was Sleeves office.

“No... the tome!” Nick said as the implications of a fire in the coati’s office dawned on him, the shock of hearing all of his hard work and humiliation having been for nothing.

Bogo had little good news to give in return: “We’re still sifting through the cinders to find any remains, but it doesn’t look good. The bomb was a diversion, curtesey of our favorite conspiracy-fetishist honey badger” 

Now that was a bit of a surprise, to put it mildly.

“What? No, why would Honey try to bomb us and burn the evidence – the emails in that book proved that she had quit working with Skvisen after we had found her lair!” Nick said, shocked to hear of the accusation.

Bogo remained silent for a moment, then inquired: “Are you certain?”

“If she managed to visit that assisted living facility who knows how many times, without leaving any kind of DNA trace, plus the last emails saying that she was afraid that she was being set up... this just doesn’t add up – this stinks of a set-up” Nick implored, feeling oddly passionate about ensuring that the right mammal was busted for the bomb.

The chief didn’t reply immediately, seemingly checking something: “Very well – but listen: Sleeves hasn’t been answering his phone. I think that someone is trying to kill this case by targeting you and the evidence. I want you out of town and out of reach of all this ASAP until it’s safe to continue this investigation”

The fox looked at the phone in disbelief. He had not expected ever get an order like that... mostly because he had no idea where to run off to, having lived all his life in Zootopia: “Ok...”

Bogo added that he would send Wilde and Hopps an email on their work-emails when it was clear to come back – and that they should be careful to only check that mail via secure or anonymous connections. In the mean time he’d make sure that someone would coordinate with the owner of their building to get their place fixed: “…the ZPD has insurance to compensate officers who are harassed by criminals. Now pack up and ship out. I’ll contact you when I’ve made sure it’s safe for your to return. Goodbye”

Looking around in the apartment, with the soggy carpeting, the soot on the ceiling, the door that needed new hinges... and now he had to run away from it all on a Sunday? Where to?

There was a dull thud, something dropping down onto the fire escape. Nick paid it no heed; he had bigger fish to fry.

“Hey red – glad to hear you sticking up for me” an eerily familiar voice behind Nick said.

Spinning around, Nick saw Honey the honey badger halfway done crawling in through the busted bedroom window: “What the... give me one good reason not to arrest you right now!?”

“Aside from the fact that there’s no arrest warrants out for me? Come on Nick, we’re on the same team here! The sheep cabal and that goat hustled both of us” Honey said, sounding somewhat jovial, maybe even drunk, but also a little too chummy for comfort as she adjusted her vest and cargo pants with seemingly no care to impropriety.

Taking a few steps back, and very quickly looking around to see if he didn’t have a taser or other suitable weapon available for self defense, Nick found nothing: “Ok... so why are you here?”

“Well, I heard that you lost Skvisen’s print book, damn shame – so I came to give you something else, so you can continue the case” Honey said, sounding blissfully out of it – as if she was half-singing every other word she said, while digging around in her pockets for something.

His brows furrowed, Nick gave Honey a close look: “Honey, are you on drugs?”

“Oh ya, had to take a little something to calm myself when I heard about the fire – I mean, you had everything you needed to bust Skvisen and shut him and his cabal down – oh here, take this” Honey said, waving a USB stick at Nick while smiling way too much, her eyes appearing far too dilated.

Nick had no clue what was on the USB drive. It could be paranoid rantings, every virus ever, actual evidence, nudes or all of the above – one thing was for sure: Nick didn’t want to tell the drugged up honey badger that her ‘evidence’ like that would never hold up in court, since it would be impossible to prove that it wasn’t tampered with, no matter what it was: “Thanks...”

It was positively surreal to see the honey badger saunter back to his bedroom window, jump out, and disappear down the fire escape. Looking at the USB drive, a generic and very worn-looking drive, the fox shook his head and just stuffed it in a pants pocket. He had far more important things to think about.

Waiting for his girlfriend to return while packing a travel bag, Nick told Judy what Bogo had said the moment she got back – leaving out the visit from Honey: “Carrots, Bogo called – we need to pack right now. We have new marching orders”

Judy wasn’t happy to hear the loss of the tome, even less so that Sleeves wasn’t answering his phone. She tried calling the coati herself, to no avail, and an hour later the duo found themselves at Savannah Central station, looking for the next train to Bunny Burrow. The place was bustling with mammals, even for a Sunday around noon.

With two small bags of clothes quickly tossed together, the fox and the bunny got on the first train available with freshly bought tickets. They were both uncomfortable with the situation – running away from an investigation, even if it was under orders.

“You sure that Clawhauser has a spare key to our apartment?” Nick asked, not feeling terribly jazzed about visiting Judy’s parents under the current circumstances.

Judy nodded, looking similarly uncomfortable: “Yes. Bogo said he’ll make sure that someone’ll make sure that repair mammals come to fix the place”

It wasn’t entirely clear for the two to Nick how the ZPD was covering the costs for fixing their place up, but apparently then being targeted by criminals from work meant that the ZPD would pick up the bill – not that he was complaining, but it had simply been a minor detail of his employment benefits that he had overlooked. Oh sure, it made sense: It wouldn’t make sense if police officers could be targeted by criminals like that without the ZPD helping out.

Of course, with that seemingly simple resolution, the topic of visiting Judy’s parents once more reared itself, in their lack of any better places to hide at.

It was obvious to Nick that Judy was uncomfortable with visiting them, especially with basically no notice, but Judy did appear to be bothered by the situation even more than that. Was it putting the case on hold that was bothering her?

“So... carrots, Bunny Burrow – anything I need to know?” Nick wondered, his uncomfortable tone obvious to anyone listening.

Judy gave Nick a pained expression. It was a not particularly happy one, for there was sorrow, reluctance, and quite a lot of apprehension in her eyes: “Plenty... but right now the biggest issue is that I don’t know who’ll be home when we get there”

The fox nodded, taking a very obvious and slightly over exaggerated deep breath, mostly to coax Judy into taking a similar deep breath. It looked like she needed it.  
Following suit, Judy took a deep breath as well: “Ok... I have a big family, right?”

“Three-hundred something siblings, right?” Nick recalled.

The doe gave Nick a thumbs up: “Yes – them I get along with just fine, but like any family, there are ones you get don’t get along with nearly as well. Ugh... how do I say this in a nice way...”

“Don’t – just give me the facts”

Steeling herself, Judy looked out the window at the forests as they slowly gave away to farmlands: “Ok. I haven’t been back in Bunny Burrow in over two years now. The reason for that is my mother’s five oldest sisters. We, me and most of my older siblings, call them the harpies”

Nick was about to comment that calling family by that was a bit harsh – but he waited to see if Judy would explain herself.

“The harpies and most of my family’s grandparents disapprove, a lot, of me being a police officer – sure, my parents were worried about me when I joined the ZPD, but the old folk and the harpies objected to it for a different reason...” Judy began, sounding about as uncomfortable with the situation as was possible.  
Nodding, Nick refrained from guessing what that objection might be.

Looking around the train cabin, to see if there were any other bunnies in earshot and finding none, Judy cringed ever so slightly: “Marriage. I’m my parents first-born, but I’m not married to a buck yet – that is... a big deal in Bunny Burrow”

Well that made sense, to a certain extent – at least when it came to the grandparents. They wanted more grand-kits! This much Nick caught on: “Oh... I guess that makes ‘us’ a little tricky”

“Oh don’t even joke about that! No really – please. I know it stinks, but we can’t tell anyone about the two of us... not even in passing, like, expect everything you say while in Bunny Burrow to be heard by someone, not just me” Judy quickly implored, looking very concerned and gesturing to her ears..

It struck Nick quite deeply just how spooked Judy had just looked, to which he smirked: “I shouldn’t be worried about saying something stupid and then finding myself drawn and quartered, right?”

Judy took just a little too long for comfort to come up with an answer: “No... you’d be asked to leave. We’re bunnies, you can frighten us with a gust of wind or a long shadow”

“Ok, so... watch what I say and stay away from any old bunnies or the harpies because they want you to get married, got it” Nick said, happy that they appeared to have covered all the ‘tough’ topics.

Judy’s nose bobbed, twitched even. Oh she was not done, at all: “Nick... its... no, it’s not just that. The harpies are worse than that. How do I... hmm... you remember that Xander guy, the snow leopard?”

That baleful evening at ZU was not a memory that Nick had wanted to recall, but he nodded.

“Ok, back there Xander talked about women who were upset about nobody wanting to date them, right?” Judy began, looking very focused as she spoke.

The story Judy told was one of five sisters who, in their youth, had been the rising stars of the Hopps clan. They were smart, very well educated, and looking to make great careers: “And of course, does like that couldn’t just marry anyone...”

The five ended up briefly dating many bucks, going from one to the other in an endless joyride of serial monogamy, always looking for a richer, sexier mammal to marry.

“...and then when they hit thirty-five or so, none of the cute young twenty-something bucks wanted to date them anymore, no matter how much money or business acumen the five had. All the good ones at that point were taken or not interested” Judy said, as if delivering the punch-line to a tale of woe. 

Nick saw where Judy was going, but wasn’t entirely clear on the exact connection: “And now that they’re angry like that, they’re angry with you because... why?”  
“Because they think I’m doing the same thing they did, choosing career over making a family – and they’re not really interested in letting me chose for myself” Judy said on a sour note, looking down at her feet.

Nick reached out with a hand to comfort Judy, but she quickly scooted away from his reach and looked around to see if anyone had seen the gesture: “No, Nick – someone might see. Look, in Bunny Burrow having a big family is everything... you know, bunnies being bunnies, good at multiplying and and all – that I’m my parents’ oldest, but not married and without kits... it’s...”

“I get it – it’s a big social faux pas, and your five harpies are too selfish to settle with someone their own age who's less successful than them, so they want to force you to not end up like them” Nick said, having scooted up next to Judy to give her a comforting hand on her shoulder.

Looking up at the fox, Judy slouched back into her seat: “You have no idea... hey, you know: When I was a lot younger, back in school, my pop once told me that the secret to happiness to know when to settle instead of having your head up in the clouds, or something like that”

“I know that feeling – s’how I ended up hustling when nobody would hire a shifty little fox” Nick said, reminiscing of days of yore.

Judy found it strange to think about, because back then she had thought that her father had only been talking about her dream of becoming a police officer – no, that little nugget of wisdom had been a lot more profound than she had been aware of: “...though, considering my dad, then that deeper meaning probably escaped him too”

With that weight off her chest, Judy found herself a great deal more at easy, to which Nick pulled out a familiar cigar case: “One last hit before I pack this away?”

“Oh gods yes” Judy said, snatching two sticks of bacon and quickly stuffing them in her mouth.

Her cheeks full of bacony goodness, Nick couldn’t help himself but smile: “Oh you bunnies... so emotional”

“Oh please, I’m nothing – you should have seen the scene the harpies made during the harvest dance the year they all ended up with no dates for the evening because   
the cute young bucks were all taken... now that was emotional, and not the good sort” Judy said, in between chewing and swallowing bits of bacon, her cheeks deflating a little bit every time from being comically ballooned back to normal.

“Fair enough, though I have seen very colorful outbursts at singles bars back in Zootopia… there are plenty of single ladies in their forties who still think they can land their twenty-something stud if they just cake on enough make-up and phero-fume” Nick chuckled, carefully moderating his tone to emphasize that he wasn’t denigrating Judy’s experience, but emphasizing and relating to it.

Judy shifted in her seat, gripping what was left of her stick of bacon tightly: “Oh I believe you – but they probably don’t have the expectations of being the first born to the heads of a bunny clan. I’m supposed to be a paragon of bunny tradition – not a crazy doe who runs off and puts herself in danger all the time”

Arriving several hours later, with a quick mint to refresh the breath and hide any traces of Judy’s carnivorous heresy, the two got off at the Bunny Burrow station.

It was a late sunny afternoon. A slow breeze was moving the air just enough that it could be felt, but it could barely even jostle the leaves on the trees. There were bunnies milling about everywhere, though it wasn’t as dense with bunnies as what Nick had expected, and most of them were giving him very brief but suspicious looks. There were also some cats sitting at a cafe, and a weasel standing at the counter at a cellphone store.

Nick found the place, in a single word, quaint: “Alright, I can see what you mean with this place having been lived in for generations... doesn’t look like anything has changed here much the last fifty years”

“Well that’s not true – the old telegraph poles were taken down ages ago, and then the telephone poles about thirty years ago – there’s a cellphone transmitter hidden in the city hall bell-tower” Judy noted, her determined gait away from the station signalling that she clearly knew where to go.

Judy had a good point. Checking out the shops and storefronts visible, Nick found no run-down buildings, nothing that looked in disrepair, just a lot of small and medium size service industry catering to the local agricultural business. Bunny Burrow might be old school, with wooden facades on most buildings and architecture styles from fifty years ago, but it seemed to be working quite well: “Fair point, but tell me: Where are we going?”

The doe quickly explained that her family often had a pair of eyes watching the train station – mostly to check on who was coming and going from the rival farms, to ensure that nobody suddenly got an edge on them: “...so if we find them, we have a ride home to the farm”

“Is business really that cut-throat out here?” Nick wondered, finding it a little strange but also nice to hear that Judy still referred to her parents’ farm as home.

Looking around at the coffee shops near the train station, Judy frowned: “On some levels – you still have to make money, and everyone here sells at least ninety percent of their produce to Zootopia, so if a new buyer shows up to place orders with a rival farm it’s important to figure out what company he or she represents, so we can invite them over and give them an offer as well. Keeps everyone on their toes and keeps prices competitive”

It turned out that there weren’t anyone from the Hopps farm playing lookouts that day. That fact, combined with the two having left their phones behind back home in their apartment to prevent them from being tracked, resulted in Judy coming up with a brilliant plan B: “We walk”

“You said that the farm is almost sixty miles away from here – that’s a two day walk” Nick noted somewhat dryly, looking at the late afternoon sun while shifting his gym-bag full of clothes from his right to his left shoulder. It was almost four thirty.

Judy couldn’t help but laugh: “Oh that’s not it. We have a fruit and veg stand near the main road in and out of town – its right over that ridge”  
Indeed, the stand was exactly where Judy said it would be, and it was helmed by two of Judy’s siblings – a pair of young bucks who were scouting eagerly for new costumers.

When they spotted Judy it was all cheers, hugs and warm greetings. Nick was sized up with a great deal more suspicion, to the point that Nick wondered if he’d still have to walk to the farm, though Judy vouching for Nick and introducing him as her work partner from Zootopia did make them at least accept his presence. Nick buying some blueberries didn’t hurt either.

“So, why are you two here all unannounced?” the youngest of the two bucks asked.

Judy looked at Nick with uncertainty, then at the two bucks: “It’s complicated. We need to talk with ma and pops first before telling the rest of you – its work related, so please stay quiet about us right now” 

The ride to the farm had to wait until the shift change at the stand. A little after five two and a half doe - more of Judy’s siblings, one with her baby bunny along, arrived in an old and worn pickup truck. Nick recognized the old blue and rusty-brown truck as the one Judy had driven to Zootopia in a few years ago.

The ride itself turned out to be a little more uncomfortable than expected – Nick had to ride on the truck bed, which was a bit more bumpy than Nick had hoped for – but he had survived rougher rides in the back of Finnick’s van.

The approach to the Hopps farm involved driving past a lot of farmland that Nick quickly figured was Hopps farmland. There were bunnies every in the fields gathering up tools, buckets full of weeds, and other random gear in bunny-sized wheel-barrows. It made sense to Nick: Using their numbers to run around and pick weeds and bugs out of the fields, instead of using chemical pesticides and herbicides – probably also meant that they could sell all their produce as organic crops for a higher price.

The Hopps compound itself turned out to be mostly underground – there were some barns, tool sheds and workshops up on the ground level, but all the living space was underground. This also made the place look deceptively small… to begin with.

To Nick’s surprise the truck was parked on a large square slab of concrete – which then sank into the ground. It was an elevator down to an underground parking garage; because of course they would have that. In the garage there were several other trucks, most of which were in far better shape than the one Nick and Judy had gotten a ride in. Did they intentionally use the trashiest truck when driving around town?

Once inside the burrow Nick once again got all of the strange looks. It wasn’t hostile looks, or even fearful ones, but they were obviously suspicious – something Nick was very used to, though it had no doubt helped that he had arrived with Judy and the two buck.

Judy led Nick deeper into the burrow. The parking garage was next to the business warren: Long hallways with a lot of offices for the various divisions of the Hopps agri-business. The way Judy explained it, then the main ‘family business’ was an umbrella holding company that owned and funded all the smaller divions that then each operated independently. There were bunnies everywhere, going to and fro, most of them looking very serious – some of the bunnies did look young, but there were no bunny kittens playing in the hallway.

“These offices are for the main veg production. They all have to stay profitable, and if a division becomes unprofitable for too long it gets shut down, like how Hopps Radishes did” Judy explained, pointing at various doors as they passed.

Nick couldn’t help but admire the industrious nature of the place: “That’s fair enough. Does your whole family work with this?”

“No, I think it’s about half... I mean, some marry and move out, some are off to college or university. Honestly it’s hard to tell: The family business is just that, a family business. We’re not publicly traded, so we don’t have to publish quarterly finances... and anyone who hasn’t graduated high school isn’t even paid, but still has to work the fields a couple of hours a day to earn your keep. I’m sure our record keeping is a mess – we have six working on book-keeping all the time, oh hey we’re here...” Judy said, starting to ramble as the two approached the main hall, as her nervousness got the better of her.

The cavernous main hall was full of life. Not just adult working bunnies, but children everywhere – from the youngest kitten with their mothers not far out reach, to pre-teens deeply buried in their smartphones.

As Nick came into view of the main hall Judy’s nervousness turned out to be well founded. At least two dozen two to five year old bunnies shrieked at the sight of the fox, many darting into cover under the benches and tables, while some, especially the younger ones, were simply overwhelmed by the confusion to which they started crying.

The older bunnies down in the main hall looked more annoyed than anything else – they seemed to understand well enough that Nick hadn’t intended to scare anyone, especially since Judy had showed up with him, but at the same time most of them had a look of “Did you really have to show up just now?”

“Well that went well” Nick deadpanned, looking down to his left at Judy.

Maybe she had simply given up in advance, or perhaps she had chosen not to fight that particular battle, but Judy simply gestured for Nick to follow him down the stairs to the floor of the main hall.

“Hey Judy, who’s the fox” one of the older rabbits said as the duo approached. The doe was calming her kitten, who had seconds earlier been among the crying choir that had ‘serenaded’ the hall.

Judy nodded to the doe: “Lissy, this is Nick – I work with him back in Zootopia. Nick, meet Lissy, one of my older little sisters, and her baby”  
Nick carefully expended a paw to shake with Lissy.

“Do you know where mom and pop is? I need to check in with them before dinner” Judy asked, trying her best to ignore the few still crying voices around her.  
Lissy wasn’t sure: “...but you can always catch them just before dinner when they check the kitchen”

Well that settled that. Judy led Nick towards the family dining hall – which of course was even bigger than the main hall.  
It wasn’t that far away, though enroute Nick noted that the mothers in the main hall did confuse him a little: “Do the kids back there also count for your three-hundred-something siblings?”

“Sort of. Bunnies have litters, and if you grow up with a hundred other bunnies from childhood then they end up all being brothers and sisters to you... you know, like an extended family – every Hopps that lives in Bunny Burrow lives here, including bunnies like Lissy who married but had her husband move here, probably because he works in one of the businesses here” Judy explained.

On some level it put Nick at ease to know that Judy’s mother hadn’t cranked out over three hundred bunnies in her lifetime – it simply didn’t sound healthy – but that train of thought was quickly dismissed as the two entered into the family dining hall, where he saw the seemingly endless rows of tables, chairs and benches, decked out for several hundred bunnies. The two dozen bunnies, all of them young pre-teens, who were bouncing around setting the dinner tables mostly seemed to ignore the duo, except one.

A doe with a garish fur-dye job, who looked like she had rolled a mixed puddle of black and purple dye, bounced up to the duo. Unlike the other bunnies setting the tables, who were all wearing reasonably casual variations on the theme of pants and T-shirts or shirts, then the black and purple doe was wearing a DJ Deez Nutz T-shirt, featuring some of the musicians very lewd album cover art, from the album “The Nut Sauce Boss”

“Oh good cheese and crackers... I had hoped she had grown out of this by now” Judy commented as the doe approached.

Nick smirked and bowed to the doe. She in turn sized Nick up, putting her paws with spiked faux-leather wrist-bands on her hips quite demonstratively: “Who are you and why did police-buns bring you in? Steal something?”

Briefly looking down at Judy, Nick found her to have a very non-plus’d expression, Nick opted to brighten things up with a little fun as he turned back to the teenage doe: “Why yes. I am guilty of stealing kisses and simply making too much money. I am here to serve my sentence of hard physical labour while living on a diet of fresh milk and blue-berry pies”

“What the hell Judy? You disappear for two years and then show up with this?” the doe said in a rather accusatory tone to Judy, having rolled her eyes at what Judy had just said.

Finally, for the first time since arriving at Bunny Burrow, Nick saw Judy crack a smile: “Relax Blackie, he’s a fox, of course he’s lying. I caught him at a gay bar, selling condoms labelled as carrot flavoured when they were in fact lined with tiger balm”

Nick had to bite his tongue a little to not laugh. Blackie simply threw her paws up into the air: “Fine, if you’re just going to screw around I’ll leave you alone”  
“Before you stomp off, do you know where ma and pop is?” Judy quickly said, just as Blackie turned to walk away.

With a dismissive sigh, Blackie replied: “Kitchen, duh – probably arguing about how much butter should go into the cabbage stew again. I swear pops is just getting fatter”

The kitchen turned out to be very similar to some of the company cafeteria kitchens that Nick had picked up left-over food at back in his hustling days. Several dozen bunnies were zipping around, hauling potatoes as big as they were, or rolling heads of cabbages around and so on with other fruits and veg. In the midst of it all, two older bunnies were arguing – the buck was holding a stick of butter, while the doe was holding a leek.

“...flavor. It’ll end up tasting too much like onion, and then we’ll stink up the burrow with onion farts and... oh hey Judy, what are... fox!” the buck said, flinching as he saw Nick.

A brief clatter of dropped wooden spoons from the bunnies in ear-shot who were caught off guard by the buck’s shout followed, though the kitchen-work quickly resumed.

“Hey Judy dear, good to see you – you should have called that you were coming” the doe said in a kind but somewhat strained tone – it was obvious that she would have preferred a heads up.

Judy looked at Nick, then at her parents: “Nick, this Bonnie and Stu Hopps, my parents. Ma and pop, this is Nick. You saw him about four months ago, when I spoke at the police academy graduation ceremony. He’s my partner at work”

Paws were shook, introductions were made, after which Judy gave her parents a quite briefing of the duo’s situation: “...so then we came here. Our apartment building was almost burnt down, and someone tried to bomb precinct one. Chief Bogo doesn’t want our case to die with us, so he sent us here to lie low here until he could be sure that it’s safe for us to return”

Stu and Bonnie looked at each other. It was clear that the thought of whoever was after Nick and Judy having followed them to Bunny Burrow was on their mind – but Judy was quick to point out that so far the conspirators seemed to prefer to operate in secret to keep their identities hidden: “That’s why we came here. Getting anywhere close to the warren here always means that you’re either heard or seen by someone”

“Well ok then... but how long do you two think you’ll have to stay?” Stu wondered, sounding less concerned about the possibility of someone trying to sneak into the farm, but more concerned about having a fox living on it.

Nick made a peaceful and calming gesture, looking around the kitchen briefly before looking back at Stu and Bonnie: “Hopefully not too long – and in the mean time Judy can show me around, reveal the secret of how you make your blueberries so tasty, or we could help pulling weeds somewhere”

“Oh Nick, you don’t have to pull weeds while staying here” Judy said, happy for the change of topic.

With a quick little sly chuckle, Nick noted: “Maybe not right away – but I’m sure if it takes too long for Chief buffalo-butt to give us the all clear, then we’ll end up bored enough to need something to do”

With that settled there were only a few minor details to work out – like finding a place where Nick could sleep. There weren’t that many guest rooms in the warren suited for mammals larger than bunnies, though there were some.

Judy led Nick to the part of the warren with the guest rooms for visitors, hoping to get him settled in before dinner.  
Walking through the hallways, Nick couldn’t help but notice the high ceilings: “You know, it’s mighty generous for you bunnies to have your homes built for larger mammals – or... what’s the idea there?”

“Well, we do like to jump around every now and then – you can’t really do that if you’re crawling around in a tiny tunnel” Judy noted, as they reached the door to what would be Nick’s room.

The room itself was very plain and Spartan. There was a bed about two tiers above fox-sized, obviously meant to accommodate larger visitors. Indeed, everything was a few sizes larger than fox-size – but it still worked: He was shoulder height with the table, so he could just manage.

“So... where will you be staying?” Nick wondered, as he unpacked his bag, Judy standing next to the door checking something on her phone.

Looking up, Judy shrugged: “I still have my old room here... and don’t give me that look – remember what we talked about on train: the walls here have ears, big bunny ears – no funny business”

“Right – but the same goes to you: We need to keep tight about the case for now, and write a report or two on what we remember from the print-book before we forget everything, but we can’t have anyone reading out notes... I’m sure news about ‘that’ would spread to Zootopia in no time, and then buffalo-butt will come and give us Tundratown parking duty for eternity” Nick shot back, maintaining a very professional tone.

“Agreed”

A low rumble signaled that the dinner bell had been rung, and so the duo returned to the family dining hall... and boy were there a lot of bunnies there.

Nick’s vision was awash with fuzzy grey and white ears. Even with Judy sitting right next to him, it was difficult to see her... oh this was going to be fun.


	10. A Truth Too Late

Of the hundreds of bunnies that poured into the Hopps warren family dining hall, most either ignored or didn’t even notice that there was a fox somewhere among them. Maybe the forest of ears was obscuring the view, or they were more hungry and tired than frightened – but only the closest fifty or sixty bunnies seemed to take notice of Nick.

This still meant loads of harsh glares, as well as averted looks. Nick sure felt the love.

Even with sitting on a pillow on the floor, bringing him mostly down to all the bunnies’ level, it felt odd sitting among so many bunnies.

Food was brought onto the tables in steaming pots and pans. Fried rice, steam veggies, salads of all shapes and sizes – the spread was rich and the sauces were creamy – though there wasn’t a shred of meat products anywhere, not even bugs.

Looking at Judy, it was just a little funny to see that she seemed to be sensing a similar lack of meat, based on how she was poking her steamed leeks.

There was a sharp ringing as a bunny plucked a fork against a glass: “Your attention please”

It was Bonnie Hopps: “As some of you may have noticed, then we have a fox at the table tonight. He’s visiting along with Judy from Zootopia. For the time being, please refrain from posting anything about them on social media”

With that moratorium out, dinner progressed calmly. After dinner a number of curious bunnies came up to Nick and Judy – some to say hi to Judy, some to see the strange city fox and hear why they were there. Nick heard a lot of comments about how he was apparently a lot thinner than some other fox who lived nearby – he figured they were talking about baker fox Judy had told him about previously, the one who had scratched her when she was young.

It was fun for Nick to see just how many different shapes and sizes that bunnies could come in – though, for every bunny that came up to him with curiosity, then there were three others who gave him the stink-eye for simply being there. He was certain that Judy also saw it. At least everyone was staying polite and not saying anything.

When the duo finally got out of the family dining hall, Judy led Nick back his room.

“I’ll give you this much carrots, you have a huge family” Nick noted, as he crawled up on the bed.

Jumping up to Nick, Judy plopped down next to Nick and pulled out her phone: “It’s larger than average for Bunny Burrow, but not by much – though I have to apologize, all the dirty looks you’re getting... if I had more time to warn them that you’re coming, maybe if I had visited here myself first and talked to them about you...”

“It’s ok – I get it. Most of your family here, especially the younger ones, they have never really been away from the farm, right? They see me as an intruder, a stranger who’s also a predator, in their home” Nick said, his tone calm and understanding.

Judy was happy that Nick was so understanding, though at that moment she was also a bit annoyed that she couldn’t at least kiss him goodnight... someone might hear it.

The next day Judy booked the duo into one of the meeting rooms in the business wing of the warren, near all the offices. With a laptop from the IT division, the two began writing down what they remembered from the tome full of printed emails, well almost:

“Hold on, you have an ‘IT division’ here?” Nick said, incredulous to put it mildly.

Judy opened the laptop up on the meeting room table and drew up a chair: “Of course. With over three hundred bunnies, you have hundreds of phones and computers... it would ruin us if we had to outsource our tech support every time someone got a virus or screwed up a setting”

The rest of the week was spent trying to remember emails. Lunch would come in by a pair of teen bucks hauling a large food cart around in the office area, handing out sandwiches to everyone. By the end of the week several dozen email exchanges had been roughly ‘described’ – but vital information like exact time and date for when the exchanges had happened, or the exact wording of many of the emails, had sadly been lost in the fray. It was a lot easier to remember the overall content of an email, than the exact way it had been written, and the duo both knew that the original emails had most certainly been wiped from the studio email servers.

“This will never hold up in court” Judy said dejected, her frustration finally peaking.

Nick paced the room, equally unsatisfied, but keeping it on the inside: “...and I will bet six uses of butter lettuce that the original emails are wiped from their system the moment Skvisen has read or responded to them – a paranoid mammal like him would never leave a digital paper trail this obvious” 

Speaking of email, then the two checked their ZPD email accounts via an anonymiser. The onion routing meant that the pages took ten times longer to load, but ultimately they found what they had been expecting: Nothing. There was no “You can come back now” email from Bogo. Then again, it was only Thursday, but still…  
Judy got up from the chair approached Nick, stomping her way over to him as much as her fuzzy padded feet would allow, which wasn’t much: “This just... ugh... we had all that evidence! I feel so... empty inside, you know?”

Nick looked down and noted that the doe was eye-balling his groin quite intently: “I know, I’m also missing a lot of the fun I had back home – but I’m sure once we get back to the city we can both catch up on the stuff we want to do”

“I... yes, of course” Judy said, catching herself in reaching out for Nick’s groin. The walls might not have nearly as many ears in the somewhat sound-proofed meeting rooms, but that didn’t mean that nobody wouldn’t notice a fox and a rabbit having a quick shag in it.

The next day was spent with Judy showing Nick around the farm, the duo even bringing a packed lunch along for a little Friday picnic. The cold weather at the end of autumn would soon set in, so the many acres of farmland was mostly bare. Everything that had grown during the year had already been harvested, but in many places quite a lot of bunnies worked hard to sow the seed meant for spring, for the early shoot harvests.

In the greenhouses there were still plenty of things growing – though Nick had to admit that the transparent plastic sheets that covered the steel arches that made up the buildings did not look nearly as nice as the glass greenhouses more common in the backyards of the suburbs of Zootopia.

On the plus side, then the Hopps farm had almost two acres of berry orchards covered in such ugly but efficient greenhouses. Good times were had.

Then there were the cabbage and leek fields that were being made ready for the first frost. Apparently some veg was able to survive the bite of cold, or at least resist it for a short while – the important factor here was to preserve them so that the last harvest could happen as late as possible: “The last harvest is always important: When we put it up for auction to the restaurants in Zootopia they always try to outbid each other”

“Makes sense. You can always tell when the shops run out of fresh seasonal greens in Zootopia, not sure if you’ve noticed... the whole city gets a little gloomy” Nick noted, recalling quite a few hustles he had pulled back in the days involving keeping late-harvest in greens low but not freezing refrigeration, to exploit the brief but profitable demand for the last few fresh veggies in town.

Sure, veggies from elsewhere would be transported in to the city – but anything that had to be shipped in from far away also had to be picked much earlier, so it could mature while in transport. It was the difference between an apple than had gotten to grown the whole summer and fall, or just the summer, before it was picked and packed in a crate for the Zootopia fruit markets.

Another strange place that Judy showed Nick was a massive acorn grove.

“Ok, I didn’t think you were into that long investments... don’t oak trees take like fifty years before they start growing acorns?” Nick asked, looking around at the tall trees.

Judy nodded: “They were planted a while ago – the ground here was too rocky to make clearing it out worth it”

In the middle of the acorn grove there was a small hut. Curious about the hut, Nick approached it while Judy just followed along, elaborating about how tree-planting and farming was a lot more related than one might think: “...so that’s why we plant trees between most of the fields, especially the ones sensitive to strong winds”

“Wind-screen trees? Neat. Say, what’s this place all about? I can see a mini-fridge and a really nice couch in there” Nick wondered, peeking in through the window.

Judy didn’t answer – and the silence caught Nick’s attention. Turning to look at the doe, Nick found himself yanked away from the hut by Judy: “Are you deliberately trying to expose the two of us? If anyone saw us near that place...”

“Whoa, calm down carrots – what’s wrong with the place?” Nick said, not resisting Judy as she pulled him away, but at the same time then it only made him more curious.

Judy shot Nick an angry look – but it was also tempered by something... annoyance, and a face that Nick usually associated with mammals having a ‘sour grapes’ moment – meaning that she was upset over something she couldn’t have: “That’s the nut hut! I... look, we can’t go in there!”

It was clear to Nick that Judy understood that he didn’t know what the place was about – but at the same time it was clear that she didn’t really want to talk about it, so he didn’t push the topic, instead asking what was next on the tour.

“Oh no – I don’t need you asking questions about this place later while others might hear it” Judy said, turning Nick around to look at the hut once more.  
She quickly explained that the aptly named ‘Nut hut’ was THE place for young Hopps bunnies to bring their boy or girlfriends: “The name has as much to do with where it is, as what you do inside it”

“Judy Laverne Hopps, what are you thinking bringing your work partner to a place like this? What wouldn’t Chief Bogo think?” Nick said in a mocking tone, his look of shock and revulsion being very comically exaggerated.

The doe took a deep breath and smiled: “I’ll tell Clawhauser that you ate the last donuts in breakroom last Wednesday... he’ll sit on you”

“Oh please – tons-of-fun would need to catch me first” Nick shot back, finding the banter quite amusing.

Wagging a fuzzy digit at Nick, Judy admonished: “Oh you haven’t seen him after he’s chugged three cans of Redbull – he outruns me when he’s like that, and we both know that I outrun you”

The mental image of Clawhauser actually being able to run fast mystified Nick so much that he didn’t even notice that Judy had led them away from the oak tree grove, to another field. 

The field they had arrived was – in a word – dry. The cabbages growing there looked parched, the outer leaves half-way to an unhealthy shade of yellow.

“Ok carrots, I’ve seen the irrigation channels you have at some of the fields, but what do you do here? The channels around this field are all dry? When did it last rain?” Nick wondered, looking around to see if he could spot any hidden sprinklers.

Judy pondered the question for a few moments, then flicked pebble over with her right foot: “Well, you take a hundred bunnies with a hundred watering cans... ok, no – we have crop dusters. They can do water, but I think these have been left to rot. They’re too dried out to save”

With the topic swung to crop dusting, Nick found himself confused: “Hold on – crop dusting? But you told me earlier than you picked weeds manually here so you could sell everything as organic?”

“Just because you spray your crops doesn’t mean that you use chemicals – come, we can go over to the workshop they refuel the crop dusters at, then you can see what they use” Judy suggested.

It was a brisk walk over to the greenhouse – no, hangar – where the crop dusters were stored. It was a structure identical to the steel arch/plastic cover greenhouses Nick had seen earlier, just with open ends so it wasn’t nearly as damp inside.

Inside the hangar/workshop eight bunnies with their feet and paws blackened from grease worked on the five crop duster planes parked there.

Two of the bunnies spotted the duo, and one approached to say hi: “Hey, I’m Pete. You giving your co-worker the grand tour?”

Judy nodded, and was about to ask about the crop duster mixtures, when Nick quickly asked: “Indeed she is, by the way: Do you have a toilet around here?”

Nick was guided over to a bunny-sized porta-john, which made for a very tight shit – as well as a tight fit – but he somehow got it to work, even if it involved detaching the roof of the plastic structure so he could sit properly.

Upon returning to Judy, he found the doe talking to Pete. She had inquired about the crop dusting mixtures and was ready to explain everything:

“Ok, so in another part of the farm we have an underground mushroom setup. Leftovers from that are squeezed, and the mushroom oil from that is used here, diluted of course, to spray on some of the crops if we get a bug infestation. They don’t like the smell or something, but it is completely organic and it washes off with rain” Judy explained, pointing towards some steel tanks where the different liquids could be mixed into ‘juice’ for the dusters.

Pete nodded: “Yup. We also use chilli oil and some other things sometimes, but that stuff costs a lot...”

“Fair enough –but tell me, who flies them? I can’t see any cockpits in these?” Nick asked, looking at the crop duster planes, especially the one that the bunnies had partially dismantled in the middle of the workshop: It was all payload canister, fuel tank, engine parts... but nothing that looked like a spot where a bunny could sit.  
Judy perked up at this, and Pete joyfully explained while waving a long cable around: “Oh that’s because there aren’t any. They’re drones – we have this neat lil' program, and they just have an altimeter and GPS. We just tell ‘em where to drop their juice and then they come back on their own, all autopilot. I mean, why waste fuel on the extra weight of a pilot? Plus with this you can pre-program how much is sprayed where, so you waste so much less juice - and fuel is really expensive!”

Nick looked at Judy. Jackpot. Pete plugged into the drone and showed the route and spray pattern programmed into the drone, looking pleased as punch that he got to show off what he did.

“Thanks Pete – tell you what, we have to get back to the warren. We need to contact our boss back in Zootopia” Judy said with rushed words, her and Nick already half-way out of the hangar.

Pete looked confused.

As they ran back to the warren, the duo confirmed with each other that this was probably exactly what they had been looking for. Judy was ecstatic: “So this is why they gave up on the rockets, right? Crop duster drones?”

“Sounds perfect. I mean, it’s a readymade commercial product – you just buy a dozen of them, program them to hose down every square and street with high foot traffic... and I can’t imagine there being that many places you can buy things like that, should be easy to track down” Nick pointed out, thinking about the business angle of how one could buy drones like that.

Entering via one of the ‘business entrances’ that led straight down to the office wing of the warren, Nick and Judy found an empty meeting room and... realized that the laptop Judy had was back in her room.

“Oh, does this mean I get to see your childhood bedroom now?” Nick said as they took a quick detour to the residential wing of the warren in search of the laptop.   
Judy gave Nick a bemused look: “I think you’ll be disappointed – I don’t really have anything gossip-worthy in there”

Indeed, Judy’s room turned out to be really... well, it wasn’t boring: Aside from the much lower bunny-height ceiling, forcing Nick to shuffle around while crouched, then the posters on the walls from Judy’s childhood were posters from police-themed action movies and TV-shows, and lots of other law enforcement fan-girl paraphernalia.

“Judy... you really need a hobby outside of police work” Nick said, sounding not as much disappointed as he sounded worried.

The doe dismissed Nick’s worries with a smile: “I love my work – and I just so happen to have a good friend back in Zootopia who’s been doing a great job of showing me a lot of new things and experiences, so I think I have that covered too”

Nick couldn’t argue with that logic, especially not with how she was looking at his crotch while saying it.

Back in the meeting room, the duo connected to the internet via the anonymiser. This made Nick wonder why a Hopps business-laptop had something like that on it. Judy explained that it was so rival farms and companies couldn’t necessarily tell that it was a Hopps who was looking at their press releases, or other news from them.  
Oh and when trying to log in to the ZPD email server the connection timed out.

“Ok... well, you did say that anonymisers slow connections down a lot” Nick noted.

Trying again, they got the same result. Also the third and fourth time.

“Maybe we can try with a different connection? The business wing has a separate connection from the rest of the warren” Judy suggested.  
Leaving the business wing, the duo made their way to the family dining hall. Judy said that the wifi there was the best, because it was usually where it was the most used, at least around dinner time.

That was not what they found there: Despite it barely being three in the afternoon, then the dining hall abuzz with bunnies setting up flowers, streamers and banners – party decorations.

“Is this something they do here every Friday?” Nick wondered.

Judy quickly yanked Nick out of sight of the party preparations: “No... and those decorations, that’s engagement party decorations”

“Well that’s nice – got any idea who got engaged?” Nick asked quizzically, while Judy used the laptop to access the dining hall wifi.

The fox quickly saw Judy’s face first sour, then turn a shade of red under her fur as she slammed the keyboard: “Fuck damn-it! ZPD email is still out... and I checked my own email too: No engagement announcements – they’re always sent out weeks in advance, which can only mean one thing”

“And that is... what? Oh, and maybe check the regular news sites – anything about the ZPD there? Another attack?” Nick asked and suggested, unsure of how to calm Judy in her current state, but also weary of the two making any noise that the bunnies in the adjacent dining hall. To the best of his imagination, then he was thinking that Judy had been left out of the loop because she hadn’t visited her family for so long.

Checking the ZNN website, the duo quickly learned that the ZPD was apparently under a cyber-attack, with their computer systems down, but that was apparently not what Judy was upset about: “Nick... the only occasion I have ever seen engagement parties being set up unannounced is when it’s a surprise party”

“A surprise engagement party, how does that work?” Nick wondered, 

Taking a deep breath and putting the laptop back into her carrier satchel, Judy grabbed the collar of Nick’s Pawaii’an shirt and pulled his head down to her level: “It’s for me. Has to be. They’ll bring in a couple of nice suitors for me, and then the idea is that by the end of the night I will have accepted a proposal from one of them”

“I... ok, are you sure?” Nick said, sitting down so Judy didn’t have to hold him down.

Releasing Nick and clenching her paws and teeth in frustration, Judy struggled to express how she feeling: “Yes! Oh this is just... oh I know how we can check! They’ll have put a dress out for me in my room”

A quick bit of sneaking over to Judy’s room confirmed the doe’s dread suspicions: The dress laid out on Judy’s best was very nice, white with purple embroidery. Judy swore, toe-curlingly so, pointing out that this had harpy paw-prints all over it.

“How do you know it’s them?” Nick wondered, failing to see the leap in logic.

Judy fiddled around with the dress for a brief moment, then showed Nick the tag: “This brand... this is really expensive – my parents would never have paid for something like this. We have a clothing division; they even have a small store near the station, and this is way beyond what they can make”

Alright. The question now was what to do? Sneak over to the motorpool and get a ride to town, spend the evening at a bar?

“Look, Judy – we don’t know how long we have to stay here, and pulling a stunt like that will only piss everyone off...” Nick pointed out, trying to be diplomatic.  
Flopping down onto the bed, next to the dress, Judy sighed quite loudly: “I know. I just... this is how much they want me to marry and settle down – and if I don’t play ball I don’t even want to think what they might do”

“Hey, carrots... remember what I told you: Don’t let them see it get to you” Nick said, crawling up on the bed and sitting down next to the doe.  
Judy had been half-way to tears when Nick had said that, but upon being reminded she forced the tears back and sat up: “You’re right – but if they think they get to choose what I wear tonight, then they have another thing coming.

“So... you raiding Blackie’s wardrobe and make-up?” Nick said jokingly, praying to whatever dark eldritch gods that might listen that she would not.

A sharp punch on Nick’s shoulder signaled Judy’s reply: “Oh come on – I don’t apply my make-up by rolling in a puddle of ink. No, I was thinking more along... this”

Judy jumped off the bed and opened up her bag. From it she withdrew part of her police uniform – it wasn’t her dress blues, but it was a nicely ironed shirt and the pants to match. Nick nodded in approval: “Did you pack that expecting to do police work here?”

“No, but considering that it’s been two years since I’ve been here last, then I did prepare for the likely scenario of having a welcome-party thrown for me” Judy noted.  
Nick hadn’t brought any fancy clothes – but Judy quickly pointed out that it was only the suitors, their parents, her parents and her who would be expected to be wearing really fancy clothes: “Everyone else just wears nice but casual clothes – if you tuck in your shirt you should be fine”


	11. Too Tired To Lie

It was the eve of the grand party. The engagement party – the surprise engagement party – held in Judy’s honor.

Nick and Judy had spent some time talking contingencies and escape plans – Nick finding it a little extreme to talk about stuff like that, but Judy was adamant. It mainly boiled down to ensuring that Nick knew the way back to his and her room from the dining hall if they had to leave quickly.

The real question for Judy was how many suitors there would be. You couldn’t expect more than one or two with barely a week’s notice, but if negotiations had been going on before that? Hold on, negotiations?

“Yes, negotiations – marriage here in Bunny Burrow is about business, not love. A doe marrying into a family brings her skills and her family’s business connections with her” Judy stated in a notably cold tone, adjusting her police uniform shirt and tie.

Nick could only shake his head: “I guess the closest you get to that in Zootopia is celebrity weddings... or if two rich heirs shack up”

“True, but keep in mind that I’m the first-borne. At some point I might be the head of the family – that means I’ll be put in charge of… everything, so marrying me would be a good way to ensure a merger between family businesses” Judy added, making her marriage sound so distant and un-romantic, like a technicality or a footnote in a business transaction.

Putting his paws on either of Judy’s shoulders, Nick rested his chin on Judy’s head: “You know, I think I finally understand why you don’t want this. I mean, a deal like that sounds about as love-less and doomed to divorce as can be”

“Oh no. Divorce rate is really low in Bunny Burrow – here you ‘settle’ with what you get – high hopes and dreams of making a name for yourself get crushed pretty quickly around here, unless you fantasize about farming – and that’s very common” Judy said, the chill in her tone unrelenting.

Finding himself somewhat unsure of what to do with his paws – usually sitting like that, with his paws on her shoulders, would lead into fooling around and sloppy making of the outs, but right now? No, the mood was so very much not for that, Nick found himself very uncomfortable with Judy blunt descriptions of bunny marriage traditions: “Come on fluff, your dreams aren’t crushed. Sure your family is pulling a mean stunt here, but you don’t have to abide by any of it”

A soft sniffle from Judy, halted halfway through and choked back, was all the sound that came from the doe for a couple of very tense seconds. It was clear to Nick that she was a lot more upset over all of this than she was letting on, and he so desperately wanted to comfort her, but he dared not do anything more than what he was doing right now, without risking revealing their relationship.

“Tell me – this kind of surprise engagement gig, how often do they pull this? What’s the usual blow-by-blow?” Nick asked, hoping for some insight that might reveal a way out that didn’t involve estranging Judy from her family.

Looking up her dear friend, lover, and partner, Judy nodded ever so slightly: “Alright… let’s see, they did it to Midna, ostensibly because she was so shy she was never going to meet anyone else. Then there was Slow Tim and Jenny, but that was more of a formality”

“Formality? What do you mean?” Nick wondered inquisitively. 

Judy pulled a wide smile, the fond memory cheering her up: “They were both mentally retarded – and had been best friends and sort of dating for a while, but were both really afraid that they would be separated when they grew up. At the same time they were both sad because they knew that nobody would ever want to marry them, because… you know”  
“Wait, so Jenny’s parents found more suitors for her?” Nick said, somewhat confused.

With a slight chuckle, Judy shook her head: “No, it was just her and Tim – but neither of them knew that. Tim thought he was going to a engagement party with a doe who would never pick him over ‘the others’, and Jenny thought she’d have to pick a buck who wouldn’t want her either… it was so adorable when they saw each other”

“Interesting – so if there is only one suitor, you don’t really have a choice?” Nick said, happy to see Judy smile, but also feeling sneaky and scheming.

Judy quickly picked up on Nick getting his hopes up: “Oh don’t – it doesn’t work like that. After dinner, when the ceremony begins, I’ll be handed a flower. I’m supposed to give that to the buck I pick”

“Well that makes everything easy – just toss the flower, or eat it, or keep it?” Nick suggested, making a slick little gesture as he pointed at Judy, as if to gesture that he had totally found a way for Judy to hustle her way out of trouble.

Judy’s less than pleased expression shot down that idea very quickly: “What part of me not wanting to be completely exiled and sworn off by my family don’t you get?”

“I do – Judy, I do – but I just… I don’t get how you’re letting yourself act so cowed by this. Back in Zootopia I’ve seen you stare down tigers and elephants. So what if you’ve never heard of anyone rejecting all her suitors. Up until a few years ago, nobody had heard of a bunny cop, or one who could talk a fox out of being a small time hustler and make him become a cop too? How do you even know that your parents would punish you if you refuse?” Nick admonished.

The accusing tone from Nick hit Judy hard – but that was intentional, and it didn’t take many seconds for it to work as intended; Judy might be stubborn, but Nick knew exactly what buttons he had to push. In mere moments Judy cycled through righteous indignation, feeling offending, to remorse, regret before ultimately settling on an annoyed look: She knew she didn’t have any really good excuse to not fight all this. Sure she was walking into an uncomfortable situation, but she had never heard of an engagement party that ‘failed’, so there wasn’t even precedent for punishing anyone for it.

“Alright Mister Wilde – you win. Just make sure I get back to bed, unaccompanied, tonight ok?” Judy said, jumping off the bed and heading towards the door of her room.

Nick got down from the bed and followed suit: “Ok… so where are we going?”

“To dinner – I can hear them thumbing in the business wing” Judy noted. Nick had heard the thumping during the previous days: There wasn’t exactly a dinner bell in the warren, instead bunnies from the kitchen staff would dart around and thump their feet against the ground. It didn’t make that much noise, but it was enough for the bunnies to pick up on.

As they left Judy’s room, Nick finally being able to stretch his back properly, the two saw that dozens up dozens of other bunnies were already heading towards the dining hall – and they were all wearing their nice casual clothes, not just work clothes straight from the fields.

What little cheer Judy had mustered drained from her face as they approached the dining hall, to which Nick pulled his emergency joke: “You know… for being so worked up about all this, what if it turns out to be a prank from your parents to trick you into ‘coming out of the closet’ about the two of us?”

“Well that would require that you told them about us, Nick, which means that I would have to kill you because for the last several hours I have been on a very negative emotional roller-coaster…” Judy said in a barely suppressed but obviously angered tone, before actually turning to Nick: “Please tell me that’s what’s happening!”  
He wanted to – but it wouldn’t have been the truth: “Sorry fluff… “

Entering the dining hall, the duo saw that the decorations had been finished: Great flowery banners, a lot of purple flower decorations to match Judy’s eyes. The smell of wild flowers was also fairly pronounced – compared to the usual “I just got home from work in the fields/workshops” funk that usually ruled supreme during dinner.

The spread for the evening was a lot nicer than usual: Sure, there were the usual steamed veg and salads, but there were also tiny tasty things that had been wrapped in flaky dough, or otherwise battered, and then been deep fried or baked, and delicious creamy sauces. Under other circumstances Nick would have been very keen to talk with the cooks involved to learn a recipe or two, but he had other things to worry about – like keeping an eye on Judy, to make sure that she didn’t do anything too stupid.

At that moment Judy was just eating – a lot. Nothing to worry about, right? It looked like she was keeping herself busy to avoid having to talk to anyone.

Looking around the crowd, Nick couldn’t help spotting the new faces present: About a dozen and a half bunnies with notably different colorations than the Hopps bunnies. The brown, black, white and cream bits of fur stood out in stark contrast to the muted greys and off-white Hopps fur. This had to be the suitors and their families.

Dessert was exquisite – Nick didn’t quite catch the name, but it had four different kinds of chocolate in it, some very heavily creamy ice-cream, butterscotch, and it left Nick wanting more so bad…

But that was when everyone was asked to get up from their tables – which were quickly moved to the edge of the hall, opening up a large floor in the middle. A bar had also very quickly been erected in one end of the hall, while music also began playing from somewhere around the hall.

Of course, during all that commotion Judy also disappeared. Nick hoped that she was ok – but didn’t want to make a scene. He also hoped quite dearly that Judy wouldn’t make one… at least not yet anyway – it was far too early to end the party in a shouting match.

The search for Judy ended very quickly, as Nick suddenly found himself ushered over to a group of bunnies where he recognized the visitors from their non-Hopps fur patterns and colors.

“There he is – Wilde, wasn’t it? He works with Judy back in Zootopia” a doe in very a expensive-looking blue dress said. Judging from the doe’s appearance, apparent age, her fancy jewellery, and the way she seemed to lord over the other bunnies around her, Nick pegged her as one of the eponymous harpies.

“Officer Wilde, at your service” Nick said politely, quickly glancing around the bunnies near him. He instantly spotted Judy, her expression and posture was as cross as her arms were, looking very sceptical and unimpressed, even while she was holding her admittedly very nice bouquet of white, pink and purple flowers. 

Around Judy were other does who looked just as overdressed as the one in the blue dress. They looked like someone Jack Savage should be hanging out with – and considering what Judy had told him, then they would probably kill for a chance to hang out with that buck.

A young buck, looking to be a few years younger than Judy, extended a paw to shake with Nick: “Jake Goodwell”

Nick shook hands, which led to shaking with all of the present bunnies. This taught him that there were a total of four suitors, based on the number of young bucks among the older visitors, plus he got have a look at each of the five harpies, feeling the disdain and disinterest from each of them very clearly: None of them had not come to chat with a fox, but it also became clear to Nick what he had been dragged over for: The goodwell buck was a local police deputy, and Nick was obviously there for Him, Judy and Jake to ‘talk shop’ and give Jake an in to impress Judy.

“Well, it’s nice to meet you all – but this is clearly not something I should be involved in. I’ll be over by the bar” Nick very quickly said, exfiltrating himself before anyone could get a word in edgewise.

The slight nod from Judy he saw in passing told Nick that he had probably done the right thing, all things considered.

At the bar Nick considered what he had seen so far: There had been no grand formal declaration of it being an engagement party – but it would make that it didn’t really become one, until Judy finally consented to getting engaged. 

“Well aren’t you looking thoughtful – anything I can get you?” the goth-looking Blackie said from behind the bar. 

Nick was at first a little surprised to see Blackie serving from the bar, but asked for an oatmeal stout: “…in fox size, if you have any?”

“We have some, but… uhm… we only have bunny sized” Blackie said, handing Nick a very small bunny-sized beer.

At least it tasted good – just as good as the one Nick faintly remembering having tried that night when Judy had first had her way with him, but volume-wise it was like two shots.

“Could you pour four or five of these in a pitcher and then give that to me?” Nick asked, thinking that if Judy was on her own, he might as well enjoy himself with some primo beer.

While enjoying said pitcher of amazing oatmeal stout, with its rich creamy head and well-rounded flavor, Nick found himself chatted up by several curious bunnies. At first it was just random bunnies from the Hopps family, curious about how it was to live in Zootopia. Nick humoured them with a smile and honest answers, drawing parallels with good or bad harvests with how Zootopia could be a risky place, or a really fun place, depending on your luck. The comparison seemed to work really well.

“So, Blackie – any of the suitors here tonight you’re interested in?” Nick asked, as the goth barkeep with the overdone mascara cleaned some glasses.

First finishing the glass she was working on, Blackie threw a brief glance at the throng of bunnies at the middle of the hall: “Nah… they’re too old for me – plus I have a boyfriend. Plus I’ll bet that none of those morons in there can eat me out as well as Chad does”

“Well that’s one way to impress a girl” Nick said, laughing into his pitcher of beer.

The doe shrugged and adjusted the shoulder straps of her black and purple top: “I return the favour. Got to work up some stamina for when we marry – oh, and I think you’ve got company”

Nick turned to see who it was, hoping but by no means expecting it to be Judy: It was two of the harpies and one of the suitors, the buck from the… oh what was it, not the combine harvest dealer family, no. Oh right, the wannabe-cop buck.

“Hey there, uhm… Nick” Jake Goodwell, the supposedly deputy bunny, said, sounding exceedingly apprehensive and very intimidated about talking to a fox compared to earlier.

Nick found himself wishing that he had his aviator sunglasses on, but took a sip from his pitcher and then put it down on the bar – gently: “Sup Jake – what I can I do for you?”

His ears ever so briefly flicking around to check his surroundings, the buck tried to saunter up next to Nick and sit at the bar in the manliest way possible. He failed: His gait looked both hilariously and pathetically over-exaggerated, combined with the plain truth that the Buck could probably pass for a high school student, even with his suit and tie, none of which in any way impressed Nick.

Steeling himself and once again trying to be as inoffensive and non-confrontational as possible, Nick simply shot the buck a disinterested look, tempered by a ‘beer smile’ he really didn’t have much control over, because fuck it this stout was perfection in liquid form: The combination of the disinterested look, but with the well-buzzed smile, was probably a little more intimidating than what Nick had aimed for, but to the buck’s credit then he didn’t just run off – though the buck’s nose did twitch up a storm for a brief second.

One of the two harpies strode up to the buck, her walk strong and full of conviction, combined with the clicks of her designer high heeled shoes. With but a single harsh glare she goaded the buck into action:

“Well I… I was hoping that you could tell me a bit about Judy?” the young Jake Goodwell meekly asked.

Turning ever so slightly, Nick drew a deep breath and sighed at the two harpies, who seemed more intent at sending commanding glares at the Goodwell buck, than paying attention to the fox in the room: “Ladies, can the guys have a moment in private?”

It was strange – but not unfamiliar – the looks that the two forty-something does gave Nick. It reminded him so incredibly much of the old looks he used to get in Zootopia, when he had wanted to tell the other mammals to not treat him like dirt, but his old code had barred him from ever revealing that their harsh glares felt offensive to him. It was as if they were more offended that he had simply dared address them – but in moment Nick knew that his close friendship with Judy gave him immunity most of any immediate social repercussions.

The two harpies left in a huff, returning to the huddle of suitors that hovered around Judy in the centre of the hall. Despite their very expensive looking dresses, and their pearls and their jewellery, then their demeanour truly reeked.

“Oh thank cheeses… I thought they would never go away” the buck said, giving some kind of gesture to Blackie which she seemed to recognize as a request for a beer.

Nick took a sip from his pitcher: “Funny, I thought the harpies would only bother Judy, not you or the other suitors”

“Hehe… no, those two have been on my case since I showed up. They think I’m the best match for Miss Hopps” Jake said, his tone giving Nick some very strange mixed messages.

It wasn’t due to his looks: For a buck, this Jake Goodwell looked about as generic as it got when it came to bunnies, with a light brown fur and a lack of any immediately identifying features, but the buck did not sound as if he had no interest in marrying Judy – he simply sounded happy that the harpies had buzzed off.

“Do you agree with their observation?” Nick wondered, trying to gauge exactly what this buck was about. 

The buck apparently needed to down about half his mug of beer before he had the courage to answer that: “Of course. We work in the same kind of business, want the same kind of thing. It was because of her that I applied at the Sheriff’s office after I got out of high school. Heck, I’m surprised that there’s only four of us here tonight: Judy is a small celebrity around here, but I guess the short heads up did that in”

“And it has nothing to do with her being the future head of the Hopps family and the farm?” Nick said, trying to come off as not sounding judgmental.

With a shrug Jake looked down into his mug: “My family doesn’t really do farming, though I’m sure I have some siblings who’d love to have a go at working here”

It struck Nick that the buck seemed genuinely interested in Judy, even if he did look a few years too young for her. If Nick wasn’t dating Judy then this Jake guy seemed like a decent fit… maybe.

“…mind you, the Galvestons and the Brownpaws, they’re only here for the Hopps farm. Hell, I think Pete Brownpaw is actually gay, but he’s loyal enough to his family to at least get married with a doe from a good family, though you gotta wonder how their bedroom arrangement would look” Jake suddenly added, having apparently considered Nick’s question in relation to the other suitors, and not being the least bit shy about gossiping.

The blunt analysis and juicy bit of gossip didn’t really surprise Nick – if anything then it was Jake who seemed like the odd one out compared to what Nick had expected: “What about the fourth fellow? The.. uhm… Wilson buck?”

“No clue – they moved here three years ago. I think they’re also here mainly for the farm. I know they’ve already married into a lot of other big farm families around… oh hold up” Jake said, his pocket buzzing.

The buck checked his phone – apparently he had gotten a text message summoning him back into the fray at the middle of the hall: “Oh well, it was nice talking to you Mr. Wilde”

Seeing the Goodwell boy run off, Nick had to wonder exactly how young the buck was. If nothing else, it made him feel old. Sure, Nick knew that he was nearly ten years older than Judy, but he simply couldn’t imagine that Judy would find a late teenage buck interesting.

“Hey Blackie, can you tell me – if Judy picks one of those bucks, will she be able to keep working in Zootopia? I would hate losing my partner you know” Nick asked, seeing that the black-clad bartender doe wasn’t really doing anything at that moment.

Blackie peeked over the bar, at the bunnies swarming around Judy: “Well… Judy could probably talk Jake there, the buck you talked to, into moving to Zootopia with her, get him into the police academy… well maybe – but I think his family will them want to here, probably have her run for sheriff. The others will want her back here too, to start a family and get her away from the kind dangers there are in the city”

“I’ll be honest, I don’t think she’s that interested in moving back here… and I can testify to her being able to handle anything the city throws at her” Nick casually remarked, finding it very unlikely that Judy would ever agree to any of that.

The doe behind the bar pulled out a can of soda, popped it, and took a sip: “Well you’re a city mammal… you wouldn’t understand – she has to! She’s the oldest, and she’s the last of ma and pop’s first litter who hasn’t married yet, and she was their first-borne”

“Afraid that she’ll turn into a harpy?” Nick quipped, shooting the doe a bemused look that probably had more to do with how little there was left in his pitcher of beer.

Blackie’s immediate reaction to Nick’s question, a look of shock and surprise – as if Blackie had not really expected Nick to know about the harpies – faded after a few seconds as she figured that Judy had clued her partner in on the topic: “No… well, maybe – we all just want what’s best for her, and once a doe hits thirty, if she doesn’t have any kids… oh boy, those five were bad enough, don’t need Judy acting up like that”

Nick had seen plenty of single women in Zootopia, from a wide variety of mammal species, in that age bracket – and he had honestly never really thought about that as any kind of problem. It was strange to see all these bunnies so incredibly focused on making sure that all of them were married and with kittens before they got too old: “How does being thirty have anything to do with having kids?”

“Look, I don’t know how much you know about bunnies – but we’re all about big family – and after thirty, like all mammals, we start to drop in fertility… and who wants to marry a basically barren doe?” Blackie said very bluntly, sipping on the straw in her can of soda in between words and sentences.

The straight talk from Blackie caught Nick a bit off guard. In Zootopia the various communities that had previously centered on growing large herds or flocks as the focus of their culture had long since seen how that wasn’t really needed anymore, in favour of adopting the nuclear family as the ideal. This idea that you just had to crank out a thousand kids as the main goal in your life was such an antiquated view on life, at least to Nick. Of course, if nothing else then Blackie’s explanation did clear up why the harpies weren’t able to get hitched any more… if everyone thought that they wouldn’t be able to have kids, or enough kids.

A scuffle over at the ‘engagement mob’ drew Nick’s attention away from Blackie. A quick glance let him spot Judy, who looked exceedingly pissed. It wasn’t really possible to see who exactly he was talking to, but the bunny she was talking to had enough jewellery on that it had to be one of the harpies.

Judging by the way that Judy was swaying back and forth, then she was engaged in some kind of tug of war – and Nick had promised Judy that he would swoop in and stop things if a fight broke out. Time for Officer Wilde to step in.

It wasn’t difficult for Nick to get into the huddle of bunnies – being twice as tall made it easy to move bunnies aside, plus most of them cleared a way once they saw or heard Nick approaching.

Upon arrival at the inner circle, Nick couldn’t see any fighting – but Judy and some of the harpies did look as if they were just recovering from a little bit of physical struggle: “Ya’ll behaving now?”

“They won’t let me leave” Judy said through clenched teeth, turning ever so slightly to Nick but keeping her eyes on the harpies in front of her.

Looking around, Nick spotted the Goodwell buck, who looked far more uncomfortable than the other bucks vying for Judy’s attention: “Why not give Jake there a go? He wants to be a cop just like you?”

Nick’s endorsement had a curious effect on the bunnies around him: The harpies quickly shuffled around and got Jake pushed up in front of Judy. The buck looked terrified – both from the harpies essentially picking up him up and putting him down, but also from Nick having singled him out.

“Relax – I only bite if you ask nice and sign a waiver” Nick joked. Nobody in earshot appeared to find it funny, indeed most of the non-Hopps bunnies looked down right horrified.

Judy did see the joke though, not that she found it in terribly good taste: “Don’t be a dick, Nick”

“That’s me, Dick Wilde” Nick said in an obviously joking tone.

The joke not being pred-centric meant that it didn’t frighten the other bunnies around him – but at the same time then it being a bit of below the belt comedy did mean that it was still largely found to be in poor taste.

Facepalming hard, Judy shook her head at Nick: “That’ll have to do. Here – here, hold this!”

Quite unceremoniously Judy thrust her bouquet of flowers into Nick’s paws. In an instant all the bunnies around the two were stunned, completely dumbstruck. On the plus side this made it easy for Judy to shove her way out of the gathering and make her way over to the bar.

Nick followed after her, somewhat confused about what had just happened: “Fluff, I thought you didn’t want to make waves here?”

“That was an hour ago – couldn’t take it anymore” Judy said, her words dripping with pent up fury. Oh how her tail was twitching – angry twitches too, not the happy ones Nick knew from bed.

Nick looked over his shoulder: The harpies and the rest of the would-be engagement mob was approaching.

“Blackie, get me the, yes – no, the big bottle, leave it” Judy commandeered, Blackie the barkeep doe placing a large (by bunny standards) bottle of Absolut Gullerod before her, along with a bunny-sized shot glass.

To Nick’s amazement – and worry – then Judy ignored the shot glass and simply started to chug the contents of the bottle: “Carrots, careful – that stuff is…”

“Oh shush, and don’t let them take the flowers”

Nick so dearly wanted to ask what the hell Judy was thinking, but she already six deep chugs in her bottle of absolute Gullerod – and just as the harpies arrived Judy passed out with a blissful smile on her face.

The fox could only look at Judy, and then the bouquet of flowers, and think that he was so screwed.

“I swear, if I make it out of this alive fluff, you are so going to pay for this” Nick thought, as he turned to answer the insistent tugging in his shirt.

Well over two dozen angry looking bunnies, the harpies in front and most of the suitors and their family trailing them, were shooting daggers at Nick with their glares.

Once again Nick wished that he had brought his aviator shades to hide behind, but they were back in his room in the other end of the warren: “So… what can I do for you?”

The harpy in the blue dress, with enough golden jewelry hanging from her ears that it actually seemed to weigh them down a bit – strange that Nick had first noticed that now – very quickly replied: “You can start by forking over those flowers. They do not belong to you!”

“And here I thought I had been given them by Judy? No, I’m going to take them home and put them in a vase… maybe press them in a phonebook?” Nick snarked, figuring that absolutely nothing he said could in any way appease the bunnies before him, so he might as well amuse himself.

As the harpies briefly fumed at Nick giving them lip, Nick noted that Bonnie and Stu – Judy’s parents – weren’t in the throng on bunnies around him. In fact, he hadn’t really seen them since the ‘party’ began. Now why would that be? Didn’t they approve of the surprise engagement party? Had they recused themselves? Maybe parents simply weren’t supposed to be part of the whole deal? Maybe they had snuck off so they could come back later to pick up the pieces?

Such thoughts ultimately had to wait for later – right now it was a tug of war for the flowers, a very one-sided one too, as Nick still had pretty much all of his police academy strength, while the harpies had a life of luxury and a bare minimum of exercise.

Holding the flowers up, out of reach of the bunnies – expect the few persistent souls who kept trying to jump up at the bouquet, but they were easily dodged. Another of the harpies, in a bright green dress with very tasteful and far more subdued jewelry compared to the harpy in the blue dress, half-snarled at Nick with a very nasal voice: “Just give us the damn flowers fox! You have no business interfering with this!”

Nick gave the bunnies before him a judging look: “Really, and if I give the flowers to one of you – what’ll happen next?”

“We’ll give them to Judy’s Mr. Right” The green-dressed doe snapped, sounding just a little too eager to give Nick a piece of her mind.

Now, Nick would be lying if he hadn’t been in similar situations before – not crazy marriage schemes – but in situations where he, as a fox, had found himself somewhat cornered and inebriated, with a friend who was also passed out drunk, though this time Nick figured that it would by no means be proper to just unzip and piss all over the mammals blocking his escape.

Of course, the way that the five well-dressed does were throwing glances at the various suitors then it was painfully obvious that they were projecting their own wants   
and desires onto the bucks, trying to get married vicariously through Judy in a weird sort of way: “Alright ladies, and who exactly is Mr. Right?”

As expected then the five harpies instantly found their united front against the fox shattered, as they each tried to pull forth a different buck – with the terrified Goodwell buck getting yanked in his collar by two harpies at once. All five of them proclaimed that their choice was the correct one.

It was difficult for Nick not to smile any more – but too much and it would look like he was gloating. Oh sure, he wanted to gloat, but doing so would ruin the hustle: “Alright, tell you what – you don’t seem to be that much in agreement. Now my partner here looks all tuckered out, so how about you hash out who’ll be the lucky buck, and then we’ll pick this up in the morning?”

Instantly the five does and three of the suitors started to argue and decry Nick’s suggestions, their voices blurring into each other as a loud but incoherent rabble, especially as the harpies and more aggressive suitors turned on each other – but Nick ignored them and just scooped up Judy, taking the flowers up to his mouth and biting down on them so he had both hands free to carry the passed out drunk bunny.

Standing up, with Judy cradled in his arms, Nick had to make a very quick decision on where to go: Judy’s room, or his room?  
Back while at the police academy, Nick had learned some police methods about hiding from angry mobs – mostly in the context of large scale events like riots – so that was pretty much useless here. Back in Zootopia he had learned to hide from various mob enforcers, all larger mammals, but here he was being chased by mammals much smaller than himself...

Ok, if he recalled correctly, then he Judy’s room didn’t have a lock on the door. He knew that his room had a lock on the inside. Well then, that made that choice very simple.

Putting Judy to sleep in one of the bed, Nick checked the door again: He couldn’t hear anyone outside – but he was quite certain that there bunnies standing guard outside. Sure, on his trip to his room he hadn’t seen anyone armed, but he really didn’t want to take that chance, though when thinking about it then he couldn’t imagine Stu or Bonnie permitting anyone to attack him or Judy over these stupid flowers.

Looking at his phone, Nick saw that the clock wasn’t even nine. Damn – way too early to go to bed.

On the plus side the guest room Nick was in, besides obviously having been built for mammals a few sizes larger than just a fox, had actually been outfitted to allow for a guest to entertain himself without venturing into the warren. A useful feature for larger mammals, since even the family dining hall would have trouble fitting something anything larger than a goat with small horns. To this end, Nick checked on Judy – she was sleeping quietly – and then he turned on the TV and tried to find something worth watching among the six hundred cable channels, dialing the volume down as low as possible.

The three cans of energy drink in the guest room minibar quickly dwindled from three to two, then to one. The late night cable television was roughly as inane and mind-numbing as one might expect, but since Nick wanted to wait for the party to die down before turning in, then it was all he had.  
Around one in the morning Nick yawned. It was not his first yawn that evening, or night, and didn’t look to be his last – but he turned off the television, bathing the room in darkness.

Listening for a moment, and hearing nothing – no music especially, Nick walked towards the bed and crept under the covers. He could just barely make out Judy in the darkness, at the other end of the bed – yay foxy night-vision.

An unknown measure of time passed – but it couldn’t have been long. There was a click. Nick’s ears flicked around to locate the direction of the sound – it was towards the door.

Well-oiled door hinges that made no real noise when opened were pretty much impossible to hear – at least for a fox – but the slight shift in miniscule light levels… even with the light out in the hall off, that was something Nick could detect.

Taking a deep breath, Nick pondered whether he should do something. He was so damn tired – couldn’t these damn bunnies just let him sleep?  
Well, if he did nothing they would likely be gone soon enough – then he could sleep, but then Judy would be angry. Ok, so that wasn’t an option.  
Flinging the bed covers over and grabbing the last can of by now lukewarm energy drink on the bed stand, Nick threw the can at the half-opened door. The can hit, with a loud metal on wood crack, followed by the can dropping to the floor and the door slamming shut.

Jumping down to the floor, Nick looked around: “Ok, whoever is in here… you’re in so much trouble. Stealing from a police officer? Really?”

Looking around in the darkness, Nick quickly spotted the bouquet of flowers. It was where he had left it – on the table, next to his suitcase. It also had a pair of quivering bunny-rabbit ears sticking up behind it.

Making his way to the table, Nick got up on it – the table being, like his bed, made for a much larger mammal. Picking up the flowers revealed a small bunny cowering behind it.

“Oh please don’t eat me!” the very frightened bunny doe squeaked.

Nick so did not need this, and thus replied with a hushed tone: “Won’t eat you – now tell me your name”

The bunny remained largely motionless, still curled up with her eyes closed, not answering.

Picking the doe up, Nick carried the young lady over to the door: “Are you the only one who snuck in here?”

The doe reluctantly shook her head, but obviously couldn’t point out where her partners in crime were.

“Alright, I got the doe and I got the flowers – the rest of you, out!” Nick said, the tone of his voice slightly raised above that of a whisper, but still not at normal speech volume.

First looking over towards Judy, Nick could just barely see her outline on the large bed – and she wasn’t stirring – so she hadn’t woken up. Breathing a sigh of relief, 

Nick scanned the room for other bunnies, and indeed two other bunnies had come out of hiding.

Nick opened the door and dropped the doe outside, then waited for the two other bunnies to leave. The faint light from a distant hallway light was just enough to guide the two other bunnies out: “Don’t do this again – or I’ll break out the cuffs and make this official”

Checking the door, Nick found a set of keys in the door on the outside. Pocketing the keys, Nick closed the door gently and locked it again, putting the keys into the lock from his side – if anyone tried to force another set of keys in from the outside, it would push the ones on the inside out and make noise.

Looking back at the bed, Nick felt drowsiness flood over him. He so did not want to check what time it was… ugh… and he could have come up some far snappier one-liners for those bunnies! At least it had all been in the dark, so none of the bunnies had really been able to see him walking around in his underwear.

Stuffing the flowers into a drawer on his nightstand, locking the drawer, and putting the key to the drawer on a string and tying that string to his underwear - a trick he had picked up from Finnick a long time ago .-Nick went back to sleep… oh Judy had so much to answer for in the morning. Oh yes indeed.

Nick fell asleep with a lewd smile on his face, thinking of all the fun things Judy might be able to do to pay him back…


	12. Shocking Revelations

Oh the horror

It felt like Nick’s nose and eyes were on fire! This was not how a fox was supposed to wake up!

“Come on sleepyhead! Get up!” Judy said, bent over Nick’s face.

The bunny’s death-breath, the result of having chugged a whole bottle of Absolut Gullerod, was like searing chemical fumes – it could probably peel wall-paper. Scrambling out of bed, Nick shied away from the source of the pain: “Damn Judy, don’t do that!”

Judy shook her head, looking far too not hung-over for it to be fair. Nick felt sleepy, drowsy even, and his mouth was like an ashtray full of weasel shit.  
“Carrots, you owe me… oh you owe soooo much” Nick said as he rubbed his eyes and headed towards the bathroom to freshen up.

When Nick came back out of the bathroom, he found Judy fully dressed and pretty much done packing all of Nick’s things. Come to think of it, then Judy had been fully dressed when she had woken him up: “Fluff, what are you doing?”

“Packing your things – bring your toiletries. We’ll eat and get down to the train station for the first morning train” Judy said, sounding far too serious for it being barely five in the morning, according to Nick’s phone.

Nick grimaces. It was just before five on a Monday morning, and he had imbibed a good pitcher of even better beer last night: “OK, Carrots – what are you planning?”

“That we get our stuff, eat, and get out of here before everyone else wakes up and organizes something we don’t want to be part of” Judy very quickly states, slamming Nick’s suitcase shut.

Following Judy through halls of the warren, hauling his suitcase, Nick couldn’t help but wonder what exactly she wanted to avoid. Oh sure, avoiding the wrath of her relatives and the scorn suitors was obvious, but Nick wasn’t quite sure of the specifics. Also what exactly was Judy planning on doing with her bouquet of flowers?

At Judy’s room, the doe quickly assembled the few things she had brought along, plus a few extra bits and bobs, before leading Nick back through the same passage they had come via.

In the kitchen, Nick put down his bags as Judy dove into a surprisingly deep kitchen cabinet, rummaging around deep beyond the outer layer of pots and pans.  
A minute or so later Judy emerged with a bag of frozen… something. Hold on, that was frozen chicken nuggets!

“Carrots, do I even want to ask why there are frozen meat products hidden in a bunny kitchen?” Nick asked tentatively, feeling not at all ready for any kind of strange revelations about more secretly flesh-eating bunnies.

After Judy rigged up a deep-fryer, started up a nearby coffee machine, and pulled out a cutting board, she finally took a moment to catch her breath and answer Nick: “Don’t you remember… when you first saw me eat meat? I told you: My mother used to get a lot of strange pregnancy cravings, and I was usually set to pick them up over in the next county”

“Bonnie? Deep fried nuggets?” Nick said incredulously, faintly recalling that Judy had complained about her bowels not having gotten used to eating meat as quickly as her mother’s would when her cravings hit.

“Yes – I’d have to sneak off to Liskville in the next county and get her some FFC at least once a week – I remember I used to be sickened by it, but now… not so much”  
Nick strained his eyebrows, trying not to look too incredulous: “I’m sorry, Liskville?”

“The farming community to the east of Bunny Burrow. It’s like the Bunny Burrow of foxes, only instead of big carrot farming, they do big chicken ranching – come on Nick, you should have at least heard of the place” Judy admonished.

“I am a city fox, and proud of my geographical ignorance thank you very much” Nick snarked back.

The coffee was ready just as the deep-fryer oil got hot enough to have the nuggets loaded in.

Nursing his cup of piping hot darkness, Nick found his energy returning, which prompted him to ask again: “Ok fluff, what exactly are we running from here? You think your family will try to sick the suitors on you again?”

“No, probably just an intervention – you know, the ‘Oh but we’re so worried about you’ and the ‘but we just want what’s best for you’ and that kind of crap” Judy explained, looking at the deep-fry oil sizzling.

The, to Nick, heavenly scent of deep-fried meat spread through their corner of the otherwise quite vast kitchen. Oh it had been a while since he had smelt that – most of what they ate back in Zootopia was either fish or insect meat. Real chicken meat was expensive, and while Nick knew that chicken nugget meat wasn’t strictly ‘real’ meat, then it was certainly close enough.

To Judy’s relief then the scent of fried chicken was just the thing to distract Nick from asking any more questions – or demanding more answers.

Once done, Judy loaded the nuggets up on a plate, the two digging in. Nick had to admit that he could not remember ever having done nuggets for breakfast – even less so ones that actually tasted like real meat… these things weren’t just made from meat by-products! “Judy, these are amazing!”

“I know, so good” Judy said, her mouth full of ketchup-lathered nuggets.

Once they were done wolfing down their nuggets, the two snuck out of the warren. Judy knew exactly where to go in order to avoid the tunnels that had early morning traffic, plus they were just early enough that there weren’t that many other bunnies to actually dodge.

Borrowing one of the trucks to drive down to the train station, the two got on the first train back to the city.

When they sat down in two adjacent seats Nick could tell that Judy, as by magic, suddenly looked very relieved: They had gotten away…

Of course, the magic didn’t last very long. Just a few seconds after the train set off to Zootopia, Judy’s phone rang. It was her parents. Nick could very easily tell that Judy was thoroughly considering not answering the phone.

It was with a heavy sigh that Judy swiped her paw over the screen of her phone, picking up the call.

“Judy, where are you? Are you ok?” Bonnie’s voice blurted out, loud enough that Judy didn’t even need to turn on speaker phone.

Quick assurances of safety aside, Judy noted that she and Nick were on their way to Zootopia. This didn’t illicit that negative a reaction from Judy’s parents, indeed from the tone of Bonnie and Stu’s voices then they seemed understanding – but they also sounded somewhat less enthused because now they had to deal with all the fallout from the failed engagement party on their own. Stu in particular did not sound very happy: “…but Judy, what are we going to tell Bonnie’s sisters?”

“Mr. Hopps, you can tell them that we had to leave on the early morning train, because we weren’t able to contact our boss, and we discovered some information earlier yesterday that might be critical to a very important investigation” Nick interjected, snatching the phone away from Judy.

“Is this true? Why didn’t you tell us dear?” Bonnie in return inquired.

Nick handed Judy her phone back. Judy glared at the phone: “Why didn’t you tell me that the harpies had planned an engagement party for me?”

Ouch. Nick looked around the room they were in, in the train, to see if anyone was listening in – aside from a very sleepy aardvark with headphones on, who was blasting heavy metal music loud enough that both Nick and Judy could hear it, then there were nobody else around.

With a quick swipe on her phone Judy disabled the speaker phone mode, bringing the phone up to her right ear – Nick obviously didn’t need to listen in on this bit of family drama.

What little Nick heard was mainly just Judy’s replies – a lot of “Uhu” and “Oh really” – none of it sounded as if Judy was buying what she was being told, then again, what kind of excuses could anyone make for having housed an event like that? He couldn’t quite remember the criminal code for it, but Nick was very certain that trying to force anyone into marriage was very much illegal in Zootopia.

After about twenty minutes or so Judy ended the call. She looked tired, but wore an expression of relief: “Finally…” as she put her paws in her lap.

“You ok Judy?” Nick asked, putting a careful paw on top of hers.

Nodding, albeit slowly, Judy replied: “For now. There’ll be a lot of drama in Bunny Burrow over this – not everyone approved of what the harpies tried to pull here, especially since I wasn’t really a doe who needed help finding a husband… I’m just glad I won’t have to be part of the fallout directly. Now we can get back and focus on the case”

“Yes – I’m sure Sleeves will… oh, right – he wasn’t answering his phone when we left” Nick said, recalling what Bogo had told them.

Judy poked at her phone. The coverage while out in the sticks, especially between towns and stops on the train line, was very poor – but she could at the very least tell that she hadn’t received any new calls: “And with that cyber-attack taking down the ZPD emails… we should swing by the precinct first to get an update, then head home to see how that’s looking – it’s all we can really do at this point”

“Right… because we don’t have any other leads, yet…” Nick said, sounding very much as if he wasn’t quite sure of his own words.

Judy perked up at Nick’s strange utterance: “What is it?”

“Well… just before we left, while you were out shopping, we had a little break-in of sorts” Nick said, trying to sound very diplomatic.

The look on Judy’s face told Nick very plainly that she was having none of it.

“Ok, Honey showed up – proclaimed her innocence, which we knew already, and gave me this, then ran off before I could ask questions” Nick quickly said, retrieving Honey’s USB-stick from his pockets.

They both agreed that since they had no real clue what was in it – and since it could easily be loaded with all kinds of fun viruses and whatnot – then plugging it in at the precinct was probably a really bad idea, unless the cybercrime unit had a special setup for that kind of risky memory sticks and whatnot. They agreed to ask.  
The rest of the trip proceeded quite uneventfully – though just as the train pulled into Savannah Central station, Judy had one humble request for Nick, expressed through a loving whisper: “Love, when we get home, I need you to fuck me to death”

“Would it be ok if I let you live through the experience?” Nick mockingly replied in a meek tone.

Screwing her face into a somewhat disgruntled but accepting grimace, Judy sighed: “Make it a near-death experience”

“Oh I love it when you talk dirty”

Upon arrival, the duo made their way to precinct one. The place was a mess: Construction crews had pretty much locked down the office level – meaning that several dozen detectives had moved down into the lobby, break room, even the bullpen had been divided up into a sort of cubicle office environment. Adding to that, officers and clerks were walking around everywhere – the amount of foot traffic within the precinct was a lot higher than normal.

“Wow… Hey Clawhauser, what is going on?” Judy said, as she approached the front desk.

The fat cheetah looked quite distraught, harrowed even: “Oh Judy – good to see you back! It’s been a horrible week. All the upper floors are getting their fire suppression systems upgraded. That fire in Sleeves’ office damaged a lot of walls and ceilings and floors… and with our email servers still down, everyone has to run around with messages and print-outs for each other! It’s a nightmare!”

“Ouch. We just got back from Bunny Burrow – that is nuts” Judy noted, looking at the chaos. There were lines of officers waiting to get up and down from the stairs – the escalators had apparently broken down from the sudden spike in use.

Nick stepped up to the front desk: “Hey, do you know if Cybercrimes is still up and running? We need to run something by them real quick”

“Oh dear no – Bogo put them on trying to figure out who’s been killing our email servers. He called it a dee-dee-us attack” Clawhauser explained, throwing a brief sad glance at his computer.

Nick gave Judy a quick glance that wordlessly communicated his disappointment, but also how worried he was – a continuing attack shutting down the police email communications couldn’t be by chance. Judy mirrored his worry.

“Ok, what about Sleeves? After the fire and everything that happened here Saturday, we were told that Sleeves wasn’t answering his phone – do you know if he’s checked in today?” Judy asked the cheetah, looking even more worried. 

Clawhauser poked around on his computer, looking something up. The email system might be down, but that didn’t mean that everything else was down: “Hmm… no, I don’t have anything, but he’s a detective, so he doesn’t clock in like we do. You should ask Bogo”

Saying goodbye to the cheetah, the Duo made their way up to Bogo’s office. They had to wait in line a bit, as there were four other mammals that needed to see him first: Two officers, a lab rat from the crime lab, and a clerk. Luckily they were in and out very quickly, as they just had messages to drop off.

Stepping inside Bogo’s office, the duo was met by a scene that looked a lot more like Sleeves’ office than Bogo’s usually clean and tidy office: Printouts everywhere, stacks upon stacks of papers, binders and folders all over the cape buffalo’s desk.

“Hey chief, you holding up?” Judy said humbly, to the towering buffalo.

Bogo slowly lowered his gaze, putting down the report he was reading: “Hopps, Wilde – good to see you back, but I do seem to recall that I instructed you to wait in Bunny Burrow until I recalled you”

The slow and thoroughly annoyed tone of the buffalo said it all: Bogo was in a bad mood. Considering what Clawhauser had said, then that made perfect sense.  
“Sir, we just wanted to check in – we might have a big lead on the N2 case. Do you know if Sleeves has resurfaced?” Judy said, her earnest and pleading tone managing to spread a more calm expression over Bogo’s face.

Nick quickly elaborated: “In Bunny Burrow we found that the farmers use crop-duster drones. They would do exactly what Honey’s original N2 missiles were trying to do, but without the need to custom build everything – and there probably aren’t that many places that deal in that kind of equipment”

Nodding, Bogo mulled over the information for a brief moment: “Very interesting. I believe that the city’s department of Rainforest Maintenance have something like that already, but they’re all accounted for as far as I know. As for Sleeves, then we did find him earlier in the week… in a hospital”

The duo was, understandably, shocked.

“Sleeves had been attacked on his way home, robbed and roughed up real bad. The timeline matches up with the bomb and fire here: Whoever mugged him used Detective Sleeves’ ID card to get in here and wreak havoc. Sleeves should recover, but he’ll be using a walking stick for a very long time” Bogo explained in a grim tone.

The chief added that Nick and Judy could continue working the case if they wanted to, but considering the seemingly concentrated effort to hinder the case, then he would understand if they wanted to reassigned to other work.

“With all due respect Chief, if we pass on this, who else is going to step into the line of fire here? If whoever is trying to squash this case is willing to burn down buildings and attack you on your way home, then nobody sane would want to take this case” Nick protested, sounding very worried that nobody would willingly pick up the case.

Bogo nodded, albeit slowly: “I take it you want to stay on the case then?”

The duo quite vocally expressed their agreement on this.

Leaving Bogo’s office for the break room, the duo agreed that they needed a plan. Not just a plan for how to continue the investigation, because they already had their one or maybe two leads on that, but also how they were going to ensure their own safety.

“I know a pizza place near Little Rodentia, they have a no-questions-asked room above the shop we can crash in for a few days – if nothing else, then we can sleep there” Nick noted.

Judy wanted to contribute to their safety plan, but Nick was still by far the most city-savvy mammal of the two: “Ok – but we’ll have to swing by our apartment to check up on it no matter what. We need new clothes and our uniforms”

“Agreed – but from this point on we also need to check for anyone tailing us. Whoever tried to torch our place must have learned the address somehow” Nick added, hitching up his suitcase as he walked towards the door.

On their way back to their apartment, the duo agreed that they would afterwards go to the crash-pad Nick knew, set up, then head out to check the thumb-drive that Honey had given Nick. If there was anything of use on it, then they could take that along to Precinct One, where they would start calling up crop duster drone companies. Checking out a police cruiser from the motor-pool, the two sallied forth:

Their apartment turned out to look a lot like precinct one: There were workers everywhere. All the burnt out street-level storefronts were being rebuilt, or at least getting cleaned up. The same applied for the stairway, and their hallway which had been completely torched. At least this meant that it was possibly to take the stairs up – though it meant having to navigate through an active construction zone, but at least the beaver foreman was sympathetic enough to the duo wanting to pick up some stuff before moving out for the construction crews.

Their apartment was only ever so slightly less a mess: The main living room/kitchen had been completely cleared out, with everything moved into the adjacent rooms, so the water-logged floor could be ripped up and replaced. The walls had also been emptied out of what few posters and pictures there had been up, so the sooth-stains could be painted over.

“Who’s paying for all this?” Judy wondered, looking around at all their things stacked up in their bedroom.

Nick shrugged: “No clue – but I suspect we won’t get billed for it”

“True, we didn’t do it, but that’s no reason not to bill us for repairs. I remember them telling us back at the academy that the city will cover most of it, if criminals attack you or try to wreck you stuff – but we might have to prove that it was a criminal conspiracy to get at us, though I think Bogo will back us up on that” Judy added, sounding quite certain as she swapped out the content of her luggage out with fresh clothes more suited for city life, plus a pair of uniforms.  
It was with mixed feelings that the two left the apartment. Sure, it seemed to be in good paws, and the beavers working on the whole building were from a well known entrepreneurial company, but both of them had seriously wanted to just get home and relax just a little bit.

At the crash-pad Nick knew of, which turned out to be little more than a back-room, just upstairs and with a window, with just a smelly mattress that reeked of hippo farts, Nick and Judy unpacked. 

Judy didn’t even bother asking Nick about how he knew about the place, or what kind of payment he would have to render, because the moment Nick closed the door she was on him like a crazed march hare: “You made a promise mister!”

One near-death multi-orgasmic toe-curling hole-stretching deep-dicking later, the duo made use of the Hungry Hippo Pizza’s employee washroom to clean up. Getting back in uniform felt nice, and for the next leg on their investigation it was somewhat necessary, as it was official police business.

Well, sort of.

“Greg’s Geek-shop – best round the clock PC repair service in this part of Savanah Central” Nick proclaimed, sounding very familiar with the place.

Judy sized the place up: The storefront looked cheap as hell, with black marker on white sheets of paper making up most of the shop’s front, in the form of what quite honestly looked like cheapskate posters and signs with various offers for virus removal and Operating System upgrade services. It looked very fitting for being only two blocks away from Happytown: “Nick, am I completely wrong, or does this place just scream hustler who’ll overcharge you?”

“You’re not that far off – I know the owner, or at least knew him. They do earn a lot from morons who can’t into basic computer skills, but their main service is the twenty-four hour support service they offer” Nick noted, walking up to the door of the place.

Inside, the shop looked more like a warehouse… or morgue… for computers. Gutted PC cabinets, cables, random very old-looking parts strewn everywhere. Judy was not impressed.

The fox behind the counter had greying fur, but otherwise looked about as ‘foxy’ as Nick did – but unlike Nick, who was in his nice uniform and everything, then this fox looked just about as shifty as was possible. The worn off-white shirt with mystery smudges and bits of dirt, the store that looked like a chop-shop for electronics that you’d never be able to confirm if they were stolen or not… oh this was going to be fun.

“Hey, Greg, how’s tricks?” Nick said in a warm greeting, his arms out and his shades off.

The fox did a double take: “Nick, is that you? Damn… so the stories were true”

Somehow it didn’t surprise Judy that Nick knew this fox – but… she knew well enough not to think of foxes like that anymore, so she simply gave the fox a polite nod.  
Greg stepped out behind the counter and shook Nick’s paws: “Well officer Wilde, who’s your partner and what can I do for you?”

“Well, me and my partner Judy here, we have mystery thumb-drive that might be full of viruses, or full of evidence – and our IT department is busy with other things, so I was hoping…” Nick said, gesturing quite a lot with his paws, especially as his unspoken request lingered in the air.

Greg nodded, giving Judy a quick look. Judy nodded. The fox walked over to the door to the back of the store, gesturing for the duo to follow: “I have a rig for testing infested hard-drives. If nobody’s using it, then you can have a look there”

Judy expected the rear of the store to be a mix of storage and perhaps a workshop. She wasn’t wrong, but boy she wasn’t right either: The door to the back opened up to a giant warehouse… expect it wasn’t as much full of wares, as it was full of young mammals playing on computers – like a massive computer café, or LAN party.

Greg led the duo over to a corner of the LAN party, where three teens were tinkering with soldering irons and boxes of what looked like dismantled electronics. Next to them was a lone computer, boxed in by some black and yellow striped hazard tape on the floor and the table it was set on. A sign over the computer read “The Hot Box”

“Awesome – I’ll have a peek here. Greg, why don’t you show Judy around? I’m getting the impression that she’s just a tiny confused about your operation here” Nick said, as he sat down on the tattered office chair in front of the computer.

Judy looked at Nick with disbelief as Greg led her away. Was this some kind of revenge for having abandoned him to the harpies? It had better not…  
Walking among the youngster playing on the computers, Judy quickly noticed that roughly a third of them weren’t really playing games – they were programming. Another commonality was that none of them seemed to be wearing particularly nice clothes, and several had ‘Happytown sucks’ T-shirts on – were they all from Happytown? “So… uhm… Greg, what exactly is going on here? I can see a lot of mammals programming stuff?”

“Well, uhm… Nick called you Judy?” Greg said, looking a little apprehensive.

Judy perked up: “Oh, officer Hopps, Judy Hopps”

“Right, well officer, what you’re looking at, is the Fox-tail Community Tech Center. The kids here ‘pay’ for time on the computers by taking turns doing tech support, and a lot of them come here to learn to program or play around making kit-bashed electronics - keeps them off the streets, and teaches them useful skills” Greg explained, showing Judy the various tables of tinkerers and gadget-makers.

The idea of kids providing tech-support, via an actual business, for free – smelled for all kinds of shady shit to Judy. This couldn’t possibly be legal. And letting kids play around with electronics, building their own things? With soldering irons? Those things would get hot! “What if someone gets hurt?”

“It takes effort to get seriously hurt when you’re soldering electronics together – and newbies are always set up with a more experienced buddy for their first couple of hours” Greg noted.

While not entirely satisfied with the answer, Judy pressed Greg on the issue of using children and teens for his business tech support. The fox shrugged off the inquiry, noting that everything was very much so above board, and that a six second prompt that ran automatically when you called the number, which would explain that the tech support service was not liable for errors or damages: “Trust me – it’s the best thing that has ever happened to me and my business. Dozens of these kids have grown up to working in IT departments, and I end up getting all the old computers they have whenever they want to upgrade. It’s the best long-term investment I’ve ever made”

“Is that how you got to know Nick?” Judy wondered, Greg’s description sounding oddly familiar.

The fox nodded: “Very much so. Him and his old partner, some fennec fellow, had about one and a half tons of old computers and needed someone to sell ‘em to. I gave them a nice price, since I was looking to expand my community centre idea. We moved out of the back room and into this warehouse. Most of the stone-age rigs the kids here are using come from mammals like Nick selling me their antiquated kit”

Looking around, Judy couldn’t help but note that none of the computers that all the teens were using looked old. Indeed, quite a lot of them looked very tricked out, with colourful LED lights from inside the cabinets, and all kinds of custom decorations: “But… these computers don’t look old – all the customizations: They look custom built”

“Oh the outsides are – but that’s just the cabinets. The ‘entrance exam’ to join the tech support team is to assemble your own computer. I have loads of old cabinets. The electronics wizards pimp the cabinets out with lights and stuff for fun. Let me tell you, every rig here is overclocked and water-cooled. Don’t ask me how they get it work, but…” Greg began, sounding very much as if he could speak on that topic for hours on end.

It was then that Nick shouted: “Hopps, we hit the jackpot!”

Relieved beyond words, Judy quickly excused herself and skipped over to Nick, who was looking at… a text document?

“What did you find?” Judy eagerly asked, jumping up on the desk so she could see the monitor.

Nick explained, sounding almost dumbfounded: “Its instructions… Honey planted a bug in Skvisen’s office, and according to this, then it’s been recording everything that’s been said in there for months. This says where it is and how to access the sound file”

“Wait… why just give us instructions on how to find it?” Judy said, somewhat confused and suspicious.

With a shrug, Nick pointed to a paragraph on the screen: “To preserve the chain of evidence… Honey wrote that she put it there as an insurance, and she knows that it won’t hold up in court if it looks like she tampered or edited the stuff”

“Insurance – and now she’s cashing it in, because they tried to frame her! Amazing!” Judy said, jumping with joy.

Thanking Greg for access to his ‘hot box’ – so named because it often had to be ‘purged with fire’ after Greg had used to test infected hard-drives for viruses – the duo drove off, heading towards Vinewood.

“Ok, how do we play this? You can’t really go in there again… they’ll recognize you” Judy noted, as they approached the front gates of the movie district.

Nick pondered the question for a brief moment as the security guard at the main gate waved them by: “Well… we have a ‘tip’ that ‘someone’ put an illegal listening device into a movie executive’s home and office. We’re just here to collect it, or rather, you are… we’re just doing a public service, removing the illegal gizmo”

“I guess when you frame it like that… oh and Skvisen is going to flip his lid when he hears about this” Judy noted, a bemused look spreading over her face.

In front of the Skvisen Tower, Nick dropped off his partner, keeping the engine running. The pickup wasn’t expected to take long, since Honey’s directions had been very explicit. Indeed, it barely took much longer than the time it took to go up and down the elevator before Judy returned, carrying a jumble of electronics lashed together with duct-tape. The look on her face was like a child that had just been loaded up with as much candy as she could carry.

“Skvisen wasn’t in, but you would not believe the look on his secretary. The poor capybara looked like he was going to die when I pulled this thing out from under Skvisen’s desk” Judy said, laughing all the way to precinct one.

At their cubicles, the next question quickly became how to proceed with the audio recordings: Whoever was trying to stop them, had already gotten into the precinct once in order to destroy evidence…

“Well, if we can upload whatever is in this thing, then you’d have to destroy our digital evidence servers, and they’re backed up almost all the time” Judy pointed out.

Accessing the audio file – the single massive eight-hundred and fifty-five gigabyte mp3 file – was surprisingly easy, as it turned out that the ‘audio bug’ had simply been a stripped down laptop that had been mangled and squished down to take up even less space, outfitted with a really spiffy microphone. Apparently Judy had needed to unplug the thing from its power supply when she extracted it from under Skvisen’s desk. Pulling out the hard-drive and simply plugging it into their office desktops gave them full access to the audio file.

Uploading the hideous brute of an audio file took far too long, and in the mean time the duo looked into the Zootopia market for crop duster drones. There weren’t many vendors or producers, but sadly at that point in the day it was too late to expect anyone to pick up the phone.

Just as the uploading bar ticket to done, the duo clocked out and headed ‘home’ to the crash pad above the Hungry Hippo Pizza place.

The next day the duo returned to precinct one, ready for a lovely day of office work: They had a big ass audio file to pick apart, and hopefully some of the crop duster drone companies would answer their phone-calls.

Snagging one of the techs from the IT department, Nick and Judy were clued in on a bit of audio-processing software that made everything a lot easier – sort of: “Ok, you see all these bits where there’s no squibly lines? That means nobody was talking, so its safe to cut the file up into bits during these lulls. My advice would be to cut the files up into one-hour segments, and make sure to index the files according to time and date so you can find what time each file covers”

It was quite the daunting task to go through that much audio, even with the supposedly helpful advice from the lab-rat, but at least roughly half of the months of audio were just silence, as Skvisen apparently didn’t spend that much time at home, though there were plenty of sequences where all one could hear were cries of pleasure and mechanical repetitive butt-slapping sounds..

It quickly became apparent that most of the interesting bits were in the afternoon, when Skvisen entertained guests – especially the very first half hour that had been recorded:

“So… how long is this going to take? I have to get back to my workshop and finish things. I still have to make all the usual stuff. What you’re talking about will take a lot of time and money” a husky female voice said. Nick noted that it was definitely Honey’s voice.

Skvisen replied: “I’ll make sure that your budgets get beefed up. Once I clear that, you talk with studio HR and tell them that you need four extra mammals in your workshop. Refer them to me if they ask questions”

“Four workers? That’s enough to handle all the set requests I get in” Honey rebuted, sounding almost offended.

“Baaah – this is Vinewood, get with the program! This place is all about getting paid a lot of money and doing as little as possible. Officially you’ll supervise. Unofficially you’ll have all the time and money you’ll need to ‘work on a special project’ for me, now run along if you absolutely have somewhere to be” Skvisen said.  
“Thank you – I’ll be looking forward to seeing those budget updates. I the mean time I have to hurry, there’s a Chargers vs. Dodgers game tonight. It’s the first time in ages they’re up against each othe-”

Judy clicked a button to pause the audio: “The big Chargers vs.Dodgers grudge match. That was months ago”  
“It was… yes it was. And it gives us a perfect day one to track all the records from. I’ll bet that Honey mentioned that game on purpose for the recording” Nick said, looking incredibly pleased.

With the start-date of the audio recording nailed down, it became fairly easy to index the rest of the audio-chunks. The issue after that was listening to it all… of course, right now a priority was figuring out what had happened recently.

Finding the audio segments that contained Nick, from back when he had been undercover as a prostitute, the duo first up flagged them so any other officer or detective who might listen to the recordings, would know that it was Nick. This wasn’t something Nick wanted to flaunt, but if a prosecutor ever had to use it, then it was important that it was easy to find the things Nick had said.

“I still think you looked amazing in that dress” Judy noted with a sly grin.

Nick frowned intensely, trying to cover up his renewed embarrassment: “I’m still more confused about why Jack had a fox-sized dress, in my exact size, just lying around…”

Judy raised a paw, as if to gesture for a protest or rebuttal – but she came up dry: “Good point, moving on”

The sound recordings right after Nick had left was mainly the sound of Skvisen snoring. A few hours later a voice that both Nick and Judy recognized as Skvisen’s secretary appeared in the recording, waking his boss up and unstrapping him.

It sounded as if it wasn’t the first time that the poor capybara had found his boss asleep in the sex-dungeon.

Of course, the real fun didn’t start until a few minutes later, when Skvisen apparently noticed that his email tome was missing. A lot of shouting ensued, followed by what sounded like some security mammals coming in and reviewing security footage. It was strange to listen to Skvisen and the security mammals basically track Nick, even as he changed costume on his way out. One of the security mammals identified Nick as a police officer, apparently remembering seeing the tiny news-blur from several months ago about the ZPD’s first fox officer. 

After the security mammals left, Skvisen called someone – this was where things got interesting:

“Listen – no shut up, I know you told me only to call you if it was an emergency – and it damn well is! A cop just snuck in and made off with my print-mail book! If you’re as loyal a fan as you claim you are, you’ll drop whatever you’re doing and do something about it!”

“…no you idiot, it had all your mail in it! All our mail! They’ll… yes of course I told my secretary to delete them after printing them out – no I have my mail books chucked in the incinerator when they’re full! Why do you think I print them to begin with?”

“Ok, but this cop – I think he was one of the schmucks who found Honey’s lab. Who? The prop-maker I had working on the rockets before you got the other idea – my point is that this will link us all together! That book had our old mails about the rockets in it!”

“Right – so you can fix this? As long as you make my book go away. Excellent, do that, and make sure they blame Honey for it – might as well give them the traitor so they’ll stop looking for us. And put a rush on the lab. I want all six canisters ready as soon as possible – we can’t have the cops stop us when we’re so close!”

The call ended. Skvisen swore a bit, but then left his office.

Nick and Judy looked at each other. This was it. The smoking gun: Evidence that Skvisen and his ‘loyal fan’ were behind the firebombing and attempted bombing of precinct one, as well as proof that they had tried to frame Honey.

The duo couldn’t run fast enough up to Bogo’s office, only to find the cape buffalo about to leave. Was it really that late?

“Sir, you need to hear this” Judy said, panting. Nick nodded fervently.

Fifteen minutes later, Bogo looked furious – and for once his rage was aimed at neither Nick or Judy: “You two, go home, get some rest, and work through the rest of this tomorrow and find out where these ‘canisters’ are being made. I will call up the state attorney first thing in the morning and have her start putting a case together, though as much as I am loathe to do so, then we can’t make any arrests until we have those canisters. If they’re loading the N2 into ‘canisters’ for their crop dusters, then we need to nab those before we start arresting anyone”

The duo both agreed, and bid their boss goodnight.

Upon returning ‘home’ to the pizza crash-pad, the two quickly agreed that they were in fact exceedingly hungry – this was the first time that Nick had ever accidentally worked overtime, and it was way past their usual dinnertime.

Their hunger was of course not what they paid attention to: The envelope addressed to them, with no stamps, which had been slipped under their door, which contained photos of the two looking very chummy together, sleeping together – though thankfully not any shots of them having sex – all apparently taken through the window at the pizza pad – which had a single sheet of paper with “Leave Skvisen alone, or the two of you become tomorrow’s big headline” had their full attention


	13. Race Against Time

First thing that morning Nick and Judy raced back to precinct one, showing Bogo the envelope with the blackmail photos.

“Well, it was bound to happen sooner or later” Bogo noted, sounding notably unperturbed.

Apparently the chief had been wondering when exactly Nick and Judy’s relationship would become public knowledge, to the point that he had already worked out a press release about it with city hall.

The real question was whether to go ahead with the press release, or wait. Bogo preferred that the ZPD be the ones to break the news about the duo, not some shady tip to the tabloids, and Judy fully backed him on this, but Nick was apprehensive:

“Hold on – so far everything these mammals have done, have been to lead us on wild goose chases, like trying to frame Honey, having us run away from bombs and fires, or just get us to waste time by messing with our email servers or sending Sleeves to the hospital. If we release this, it’ll mean me and Judy having to do a lot of press conferences, and city hall will want to parade us around as another perfect example of how Zootopia brings different mammals together… it’s all about wasting our time to stall the investigation” Nick pointed out, sounding exceedingly investigative.

Judy couldn’t help but agree that what Nick was talking about made an awful lot of sense. She also found him exceedingly sexy in his combination of his skills of manipulation and police investigation, but she kept that fact to himself: “Like in the Mouscovich blackmail case – the guy’s business partner had photos of him smooching with his secretary. He emailed him those photos. You can’t blackmail someone if you can’t really prove that you have dirt on them”

“Yes and no – I’ve seen plenty of hustlers who’ve tricked mammals into giving them things on false pretenses… sometimes the mere threat of public embarrassment until the accusations are proven untrue is enough – maybe that’s what the blackmailer is betting on here? I mean, even if they don’t have real proof, then the media would be all over us for a few days if they leak this” Nick followed up, working the hustler-angle of the possible motive behind the blackmail.

“Both of you have a point – but if this hits the tabloids tomorrow morning, you’re going to find it very difficult to conduct your investigation no matter what” Bogo noted, sounding unmistakably as if he had heard discussions like this one before.

Judy jumped up on Bogo’s desk: “Then we go on the hunt!”

The bunny quickly pointed out that the few pictures that were in the envelope all seemed to have been from their first night at the pizza pad – not earlier from the same day, when the two had actually gotten intimate at the same location – and if the blackmailer had actual photos of the two having sex, then it stood to reason that such scandalous photos would have been included in the blackmail package. 

“Your point Hopps?” Bogo inquired, while Nick was already nodding , having already guessed what Judy was getting at.

“They don’t have good blackmail material. This stuff was made in a hurry – so whoever is taking these pictures… I’ll bet my ears that the shutterbug is still out there, looking to get something better to blackmail us with. I’m thinking we set up an ambush” Judy said, getting that predatory look in her eyes that Nick loved so much.

Bogo looked at the pictures once more: Nick and Judy sitting together, looking at something on Judy’s phone, and the two sleeping together on a mattress. It wouldn’t be difficult to dismiss pictures like that as simply being two partners who also lived together, without there being any romatic activity between the two, even more so because the two had a legit reason for ‘temporarily’ shacking up due to the case and the firebug after them: “If this is the best they have to blackmail you with… yes, they’ll want more – but do be careful. This could be a scheme to set the two of you up for an ambush just the same, like what happened with Sleeves”

“Fair enough – by the way, what’s the latest news about him?” Judy asked earnestly.

All Bogo could tell was that the coati was recovering, but that it would be a while before he could be checked out, let alone wake up.

Leaving Bogo, the duo headed to the motor pool: To trap their shutterbug stalker, they knew that they had to act like everything was normal.

“Ok, so… where to?” Judy asked, tapping the steering wheel as they waited for the lights to change at the first intersection.

“I’m thinking the horns-borough construction site. We can pretend to be tracking Honey again, looking for other entry points to the old underground tunnels, or other underground hideouts” Nick explained, along with a few extra fun details…

At the construction site the two head straight in, parking the cruiser up at ground level before delving into the pit dug out for the sub-levels of the structure.  
The two quickly find another hole in the wall: A toppled slab of concrete had left a huge space open to get into the underground tunnels.

The moment the two plunged into the darkness, they split up – though Judy, using her carrot pen and various lines that Nick had recorded, pretended to have a lively and quite vocal conversation with Nick…

Nick waited in the darkness right next to the entry-point to the outside, and sure enough, a minute or so later, just as Judy’s conversation began to fade into the echoes of the tunnels, a deer in a nice jacket with a big ol’ camera and telephoto-lens crept through the opening.

“Greetings. Can I see some identification please? This construction site is off limits to the public” Nick calmly stated, his shades not at all helping his otherwise quite functional night-vision, but they made him look really intimidating as he lit up the doe down with his flashlight.

Caught in the headlights, the doe froze, nearly dropping her very expensive-looking camera. She only managed to give the hole in the wall out of there a single glance before Nick pointed his dart-gun at her: “Not happening”

Back topside, in the mostly empty construction site parking lot, Nick and Judy had quite a few questions and precious little patience for poor excuses, of which the doe had plenty.

“You recognize these photos?” Judy asked, giving the doe a very stern glare.

The doe only gave the photos the briefest of looks before shying away from them: “No, never seen them before”

“Really? And when we toss your office and your home looking for the originals, confiscating any and all data-storage devices and cameras you have to see if the originals are on any of them, you sure we won’t find anything?” Judy said, taking three firm and authoritative steps towards the doe.

A look of horror spread on the doe’s face: “What? But that would… my computer, and my cameras – that’s my livelihood!”

“I can name you eight judges who’ll give us all the search warrants we want simply based on you following after us after we got this blackmail letter. Three of them would probably convict if we prosecute you for the blackmail charge” Nick casually noted.

The doe’s expression changed from one of horror to one of confusion – though it was clear that it had dawned on her, that she had been caught in something far greater than she had the nerve for: “Hey look, I just took the pictures and emailed the raws to some burn account. I got my payment in cash in an envelope just like that on”

“Do you still have that cash?” Judy asked quizzically, that predatory look once again creeping over her face.

It weirded the hell out of the doe.

At the deer’s ‘office’ – her apartment’s living room – the grand business address and two room apartment of the Dainty Hoof Private Investigations Ltd. company – Nick and Judy had a sniff at the cash the private dick had been paid to stalk them.

“Ok… this is a little strange” Judy said, looking at the five neat stacks of ten-notes. Five thousand bucks, the doe’s usual retainer for her ‘track and tag’ package.

Nick looked at the money bundles. They looked like… cash – neat one-hundred bundles, with those cool little paper wrap-around thingies: “I’m not seeing anything unusual”

Judy took careful photos of the cash, and wrote down the serial numbers of quite a lot of the bills – quickly confirming that they were all sequential notes.  
Leaving the doe, with a parting gift in the form of a very stern warning to stay the hell out of their Nick and Judy’s lives – both private and professional – Judy explained her confusion as they drove back towards precinct one: “Nick, sequential stacks of cash like that… you can only get that from inside a bank”

“Most mammals get their money from banks fluff” Nick replied, still not seeing the problem.

Frowning, Judy took a single deep breath and pulled out into traffic: “Nick, cash with those wrap-around thingies are never given out to the public like that. Cash in that form is for loading into an ATM or for transport. If a bank-teller was to give out that much money in cash, they would be required to pop those wrap-arounds off first. That’s how the banks can tell that the notes have entered into circulation…”

“So it’s like… warranty void if you break the seal?” Nick wondered, finding the idea of rules about how you dispense money sounding a bit off.

With a chuckle, Judy nodded: “Yes, but on the plus side then each of those wrap bands have a unique serial number we can track. We just need to pop in by economic crime when we get back to precinct one”

“Hmmm, cool – never visited them before” Nick noted.

It turned out that the Economic Crimes Division was basically “accountant cops” – and they all wore suits, making Nick feel surprisingly underdressed, even with his police uniform.

The cash-wraps were very quickly tracked, as it was just a question of looking up the numbers: They had been delivered to the City Hall Bursar, and were marked as dispensed, though clearly someone had forgotten to pop the tags when the money had been paid out.

“Interesting… so the money was from city hall – does it say who it was dispensed to?” Judy asked, barely able to hold herself back. This could totally make the case!  
The bull adjusted his glasses and checked the database he was looking at: “Hmm… no, can’t help you there. The money was dispensed to the Department of Flora Maintenance, doesn’t say why”

“Who signed off on it from that department? Nick wondered.

“Sorry – it’s the other way around. It’s one of the bursar office clerks who signs off on it. If you’re hoping to trace it beyond that you’re pretty much out of luck” the bull noted, sounding suitably apologetic in his inability to give the duo the smoking gun they were looking for.

Judy stamped her right foot furiously. Oh she was fuming!

“Ok, but you’re absolutely certain that it was given to someone from the Flora Maintenance department? It couldn’t have been given to someone else?” Nick quickly asked, trying to at least get something useful out of the situation.

The bull nodded: “Oh yes, definitely. I’ve tangled with city hall before about how they use their petty cash – but they are very firm on keeping it around. For the first year or so after Bellwether got busted we didn’t do anything other than track down city hall bursar money used for bribes or secret payments during her reign…”

“They didn’t remove the wrap-arounds either?” Nick wondered.

The bull nodded, smiling in that unique police officer ‘the criminals did something stupid’ kind of way.

With all the information they could get from the money acquired, Nick and Judy headed over to Bogo to report their findings.

“Interesting… have you checked Skvisen’s meeting schedule to see when he last met with someone from that department?” Bogo inquired, making the duo feel really silly that they hadn’t checked that.

The look on Nick and Judy’s faces told Bogo everything he needed to know, but that simply meant that he could move on to more serious business: “Ok, when you find out who Skvisen has been meeting with from that department – and this will be a mammal he’s met with multiple times in his office – then I need you to follow that mammal around at first. We need to know where those canisters are. If this mammal works at city hall there’ll be an office computer we have can have city hall IT clone a copy of overnight, that we can look around in for more evidence”

It surprised Nick that Bogo knew about that kind of tech terms, but the plan was quite good none the less. Judy didn’t question anything, merely accepting the orders and pulling Nick back to their cubicles.

One of the few bits of digital information that Sleeves had collected and uploaded to the ZPD evidence servers before his office got torched and himself got hospitalized, was a copy of Skvisen’s meeting schedule. According to Sleeves’ notes then the schedule had been supplied by the movie studio… in fact, it turned out to be a direct link to Skvisen’s online calendar, meaning that it was still being updated by Skvisen’s secretary, completely without Skvisen or the secretary knowing of it – with the twist that the feed Sleeves had gotten also showed any changed made to the calendar, like deleted entries or if a day had suddenly been cleared.  
A simple word search showed loads of meetings with various mammals from city hall – and that was it too: “Damnit… his secretary just writes ‘meeting with city hall rep’ – he doesn’t write what department”

“Shouldn’t matter – look: He had meetings with mammals from city hall here, here and here. We can simply send an email to the department head for floral maintenance and find out if that was any of theirs, and who” Judy said, looking ever so slightly worried.  
Nick threw a brief glance at Judy. It was difficult to tell exactly what she was worried about, but her brows spoke clearly that something was bothering her: “What are you thinking fluff?”

“We don’t know who in that department has been meeting with Skvisen. If we send an inquiry, that might be enough to tip off whoever we’re looking for” Judy said with a slight pout.

The issue of accidentally tipping off criminals when looking for them had been a big topic at the academy. Many criminals didn’t do much to look out for police, some because the mere act of doing so would make them a lot more suspicious – some because they simply didn’t think the police would look for them. When dealing with criminals that took active measures to stay hidden the rules were different: This mammal, or mammals, was clearly adept at working through intermediaries, like Skvisen, to recruit builders like Honey to actually make the things needed for their plans.

“Honestly, at this point I think that’s a chance we’ll just have to take” Nick argued.

Judy simply frowned, still indecisive.

“Look – whoever it is already knows that were looking for them. It’s no secret that we’re investigating Skvisen, since the goat called our perp up directly, also…” Nick noted, his words trailing off as an idea developed.

Looking up at her fox partner, Judy shot Nick an inquisitive raised eyebrow: “Yes?”

“Skvisen is a big producer – he’s probably met with a lot of mammals from all kinds of departments from city hall. Like, if he needs a movie blocked off for a movie shoot, so we just send an email to all city hall department heads. We’ll ask them all who’s met with Skvisen within the last six months” Nick explained, sounding all kinds of excited for his little scheme.

Nodding in agreement, Judy expressed her approval: “So if our perp hears about this, or reads the email, it’ll still look like we’re focusing our investigation on Skvisen”  
Nodding, Nick started typing out an email, while Judy began going through the city hall department registry for email addresses.

It was about three in the afternoon when the emails were finally sent out – and they went out slowly, due to the email server DDOS attack.

“You think we’ll even be able to receive their replies with the mail server being like this?” Judy wondered, looking at the very slowly crawling progress bar.

Nick shrugged: “If we don’t have replies from everyone by tomorrow we can go to city hall and just ask around – we can cover some other departments before swinging by flora maintenance to make it look legit”

“I don’t want to wait…” Judy said, her tiny paws curling into fuzzy fists.

Heading down to the motor-pool, the duo headed towards city hall. On the way, Nick simply had to ask again, just to get their story straight: “So… we’re going there now to either leave messages, or check that the emails went through duo to the server attack?”

“Yes, and then we can try to clear as many departments as possible while there” Judy noted, sounding confident that their excuse didn’t just sound legit, but was legit.  
Zootopia City Hall: A grand structure, projecting the unity of the many species of the city. It stood tall, yet not too imposing, not that far from precinct one – though the downtown traffic was a mess at that time of day.

“We should have just walked…” Nick noted as they ascended the stairs to the main entrance.

Judy frowned mightily, already annoyed by the traffic – and now also Nick’s commentary as well as all the mammals leaving the building: “We’ll keep that in mind for later… right now I’m more worried about all the mammals leaving: They’re all going home”

At the front desk, the duo caught the attention of a security guard who indeed confirmed that pretty much everyone was going home: “You might be lucky that there’s someone left up in flora maintenance – if anyone’s working late… but if you want to talk to department heads you’ll be better off trying again tomorrow”  
Trying their luck, Nick and Judy made their way in. The security guard buzzed them into the inner offices of city hall, away from the publicly accessible areas. The various departments were all cubicle farms, most of which were quite empty.

In flora maintenance there was barely a soul left – but they caught a vole closing down her workstation.

“Hey, my name is Officer Judy Hopps – we’re looking for someone, could you spare a second?” Judy asked, going for a pleading and earnest approach.

The vole shot Judy a tired look: “You’re kidding me right? I clocked out five minutes ago – I’m not getting overtime here”

Nick stepped up and knelt down to the vole: “You can tell us what we need to know on the way out – we won’t keep you here”

The vole shot the duo an annoyed glare and adjusted her skirt: “Alright, what do you want to know?”

“We’re investigation a corrupt producer in Vinewood who’s been misusing his funds – and we know that he’s met with a lot of mammals from city hall. We need to know who he’s been meeting with, because his meeting schedule doesn’t say, so we can find out what he’s been spending his money on” Judy explained.

The vole shrugged as she made her way to the elevator: “Oh our department gets all kinds of requests from Vinewood. Those idiots love to ask for us to shut off the rain in the rain-forest district whenever they’re shooting scenes there – they have no respect for it actually being a rain-forest! But if you’re looking for mammals from this department going there, then you want to talk to Djalo. We send him whenever those big-wigs ask for someone to talk to, so we can stay here and actually get some work done”

“Interesting – and who’s Djalo?” Nick said, taking notes.

The vole let out a shrill laugh: “He’s our latest intern. We’re basically using him like a messenger, since all he usually comes back with are written petitions and signed permits – but he loves it, real movie nut”

Nick and Judy exchanged knowing looks.

“Ok – well we’ll need to talk to him. Has he gone home for today?” Judy inquired, just as the vole got into the rodent elevator.  
Just before the door closed, the vole said: “He only comes on Tuesdays and Thursdays – he has classes at ZU today– but if you want to talk to him, check with HR. They always stay late and will have his address, ask for Djalo Simbason”

The elevator ride down to the level where city hall HR was on was oddly tense. Both Nick and Judy were positively giddy over the idea of finally having a possible identity to Skvisen’s “loyal fan” – the mammal who put lured Skvisen into the whole N2 conspiracy. He would know where those mystery N2 canisters were.

True to the vole’s word, then there were several mammals in HR. The moment Nick and Judy stepped into the HR cubicle farm, a greying antelope who looked to be in his mid-fifties instantly leapt up and approached the two: “Good afternoon officers – anything I can help you with?”

It was ever so slightly amusing how the antelope seemed almost panicky – he was clearly expecting that Nick and Judy were there to deliver bad news, or demand information for someone wanted for arrest… which wasn’t that far from the truth, but still not quite there. Or maybe it was the three empty coffee pitchers and the empty coffee mug on his desk that had made the antelope so jittery?

“Yes, we’re looking to ask some questions to an intern from flora maintenance in connection to a case. His name is Djalo Simpson I believe” Judy said, Nick remaining silent behind his shades.

The antelope nodded for a brief moment, then sprung into action, typing furiously at his workstation. A few seconds later Djalo Simbason’s HR file sputtered out of a nearby printer.

Leaving with their information, the duo bee-lined for their cruiser, and from there to the address of the young lion. The HR file photo was a very nice color picture, showing a rather ordinary looking young lion.

“Ok Nick, talk to me – who are we looking for?” Judy asked as she drove towards the lion’s listed address.

Looking at the HR profile, Nick gave Judy the summary: “Well, he’s twenty-one, studies environmental engineering at ZU. He started as an intern at city hall a bit over six months ago, but was transferred over to flora maintenance four months ago. He started out in the city hall internship training program, passed it with flying colors”

“Learning how to brew coffee and do as you’re told?” Judy quipped.

Nick chuckled briefly, flipping a page on the profile print-out: “Who knows. But there are no black marks or anything on his profile. He has an uncle who works as an environmental engineer at the coolers on the Tundratown/Sahara Square wall”

“Hmm… you know what else we know about him?” Judy inquired knowingly.

Nick leafed through the print-outs, most of which were old academic transcripts of Djalo’s ZU grades: “Nah, there’s nothing else in here of us”

“Well, I can tell you that I have a sneaking suspicion that he’s really good at setting fire to things – look” Judy noted in a glum tone.  
They had arrived at the right address: The house before them was on fire.

“Want to bet that the fire fighters find signs of the same accelerant used at our place used here?” Nick wondered, sounding very tired all of a sudden.  
Judy rested her forehead against the steering wheel: “No bet. Call it in, tell Bogo that we have an arsonist lion on the run”

Bogo was not pleased to hear that the ‘loyal fan’ had eluded Nick and Judy – but at the same time he appreciated that he finally had a name to pin on this mystery mastermind. An all-points bulletin had been issued by the time Nick and Judy had gotten home.

The next day at precinct one’s morning briefing, Bogo clued the rest of the day shift in on Nick and Judy’s progress: “…and the fire investigator’s report confirms that the same accelerant used at the scene was found at the scene of the fire set at officer Hopps and Wilde’s apartment building”

“Damn… burning down your own home to cover your tracks – that’s cold” Fangmeyer commented.  
Suddenly the door to the bullben swung open, hard, slamming into the wall! It was Clawhauser, looking exhausted: “Sir, chief! That ABP we put out yesterday…”

“Easy Clawhauser – take your time, but this had better be good” Bogo said, sounding less than pleased that his briefing had been interrupted.

Clawhauser staggered over to the officers sitting in for the briefing, leaning on Fangmeyer’s bulk: “Right – we just got an anonymous tip in on the tip hotline. He’s been spotted, we have an address”

With a single firm nod, Bogo locked his gaze on Nick and Judy: “Hopps, Wilde, go – bring him in, get me that N2. I want him to be a loyal inmate by sun-down”  
Neither Nick, Judy or Clawhauser had to think twice before making their way out of the bullpen.

On their way to the motor-pool the duo got the address from Clawhauser, as well as a nice and fresh arrest warrant.   
The address was for a commercial property on the edge of a suburban neighbourhood in the north-eastersn edge of Savannah Central, not that far from the border to the Canal district. The computer read-out said that it was owned by the Sunshine Foundation…

“What the hell kind of place is this…” Nick mused, as Judy drove towards the address.

Without taking her eyes off the road, Judy got the impression that the address had a lot of red flags attached to it from the corner of her eyes: “Talk to me Nick”

“Almost seventy complaints from the neighbours. Loud music later at night, public intoxication on the property, oh and get this ’Raiding trashcans’ – this sounds like a drug-den…” Nick explained, looking at the mile long list of things that various mammals had reported about the place.

“Sounds like a perfect place for a wanted lion to hide” Judy said, sounding eager to start her day with a good old arrest.

“This is the perfect place to hide a wanted lion” Judy said, all traces of joy and positivity drained from her voice, as she and Nick looked at the property.

The fenced off compound looked like a trailer-park that had gotten a small office building set in the middle of it. There were small tents and make-shift shacks setup everywhere, along with small fire pits dotted around them, and garbage strewn everywhere. Between the tents there were holes dug in the grass, and apparently stuff had been planted there – amateur urban farming? How quaint. There were quite a lot of mammals, many of them looking to be in their teens or early twenties, sitting around the place. 

Of course, the worst part of it was the very poorly made sign out in front, which was made out of several large heavily rain-damaged plywood sheets that had been nailed together, with roughly stencilled spraypaint spelling out:

“The Blissfull and Enlightened Society for Embracing Righteous Change” Nick read, finding the acronym BESERC somewhat amusing.

Judy was anything but amused, recognizing some of the banners further inside the place: “Nick… this is the headquarters for that crazy lioness”

The two police officers at the front gate did not go unnoticed for long, which quickly let to shouts of panic through-out the tents and the mini farm plots, and a subsequent minor stampede as everyone rushed into the house.

Nick suddenly found Judy’s reaction a lot more relatable: These mammals clearly did not like police, so getting a straight answer about that lion would probably be impossible.

The mad dash to get inside the building rustled quite a few of the hand-painted banners hanging from the office building, many of which had slogans like “Down with capitalism” and “Defang the police” or “Declaw the police” – the fluttering banners also revealed that all the ground floor windows had been boarded up.

“Well, let’s get this over with” Nick said, pushing the buzzer at the gate.

Judy groaned, struggling not to simply stomp back to the cruiser.

A grainy voice emerged from the buzz-com: “No oppressors allowed. Go away”

“Nice try – but we have a tip that a young male lion is hiding in your compound, and we have a warrant for his arrest. Djalo Simbason? Please don’t make me have to get a search warrant” Nick pleaded, finding it difficult not to sound too harsh in his tone, because it didn’t take a hustler to figure out that the duo would get nowhere if they used threats, but they still have to follow protocol.

“…Just go away” was the scratchy reply.

Nick pushed the buzzer one more time: “You do know what obstruction of justice is? Just play ball with us here and we’ll be gone in twenty minutes, tops”  
If nothing else, then Judy actually had to admire that Nick was willing to negotiate for this long with the lunatics – then again, he had only ever really had a single run-in with that insane lioness.

“Oh hey, speak of the devil” Judy mused, as the lioness emerged from the front door of the building.

Nick shook his head in bemusement as the lioness approached: “Yes, your favourite trans-species-fluid cat lady”

From the other side of the chain-link fence, the lioness stood tall in what looked like an oversize but quite well made sheep costume, complete with a wool wig and black finger/toe-less socks and gloves: “You two need to go”

“We’re looking for a young lion, Djalo Simbason, and we got a tip that he might be here – we have a warrant for his arrest” Nick   
With a huff the lioness wrinkled her nose at Nick: “There is no Djalo here. That was the dead-name his oppressors gave him”

Judy gave Nick a confused look, mirrored by Nick. Dead-name?

“So… he is here then?” Nick inquired quizzically, trying to make sense of what the lioness had said.

The expression on the lioness soured, as if Nick had just gravely insulted her: “Cheeses! You keep assuming his gender you absolute shitlord! She is here, not he!”  
For a brief moment the lionesses bared fangs lingered, but then she seemed to realize that she had just given away that the mammal Nick and Judy were there for, was actually in the compound. Her expression instantly changed to one of great offense, as if she had been tricked, and not just rambled on a bit too much.

Looking at the lioness stomping off, Nick looked down at Judy: “So… call in for backup?”

“We need to call in for a search warrant, that’s for sure…” Judy said, sounding far too tired for it barely being nine in the morning on a Thursday.


	14. Fire Rising

Calling in to Bogo that they had gotten confirmation that their wanted lion was indeed where the tip had said, but that it was the headquarters of that crazy anti-police lioness who refused to let them in, Nick and Judy got new marching orders: “If they have retreated into the building, then circle around the place. Check for exits and find a spot to monitor the place until backup arrives”

A quick walk around the fence that boxed the compound in revealed a few extra exits – but aside from the front door, then they appeared to be have been boarded up and blocked off quite heavily with crates and oil drums full of junk. Between the tents, a very poorly maintained swimming pool behind the building relative to the front gate, all the patches of attempted backyard-farming, and all the trash that littered the place, the place looked like a mess. It was a fire hazard without a doubt, and that it didn’t smell any worse was a miracle. Judy also couldn’t help but notice that the steel spikes at the top of the chain-link fence were pointed inward, not outward.

“Do they want to keep mammals in, not out?” Nick wondered, not finding the implications of that very promising.  
Judy tugged at the fence, the taught steel wire not budging an inch: “No idea – but I can’t imagine having the side exits blocked off is up to code… then again, I can’t imagine any building inspectors ever wanting anywhere near here”

Twenty minutes later the whole gang showed up: Fangmeyer, Grisoli, Sergeant McHorn and Trunkaby. Four big officers – perfect for storming a little hippie squat, or whatever the place was.

With a fresh search warrant, the six approached the gate – Nick poking the buzzer once again. They got no reply.

Second time around Nick read out the search warrant to the buzzer. No reply.  
With McHorn’s blessing, Fangmeyer pulled out a wolf-sized bolt-cutter and went to town on the chain-link fence, bringing the front gate down.

Approaching the building, the six were quickly met with a barrage of rocks and broken bricks, forcing a quick retreat. Fangmeyer even got hit by a brick on his left shin, but he shrugged it off – though he didn’t exactly look happy about it.

At a safe distance, Nick asked the obvious question: “So… did anyone bring riot-gear?”

“No, but when we got close I did recognize one of the banners from the Xander-riot. These are the same mammals that hurt all those students” Judy pointed out.

McHorn grouched: “I never understood why we were told to stay away from that – but hey, it looks like we get our chance for payback now instead of later”

Calling in the somewhat armed resistance, Bogo replied that he had already gotten the riot gear loaded up for dispatch: “It’ll arrive in thirty minutes – sit tight and keep a look out for anyone trying to sneak away. If we can keep the lion there, then we’ll catch him when we raid the place”

The waiting game was rather boring, as the place where the compound was located was several blocks away from even the simplest of coffee shop or other distraction to make time pass while everyone waited. All they could do was watch as the mammals inside the office building seemed to fortify themselves even more, gaps in the boarded up windows getting covered up, and mammals appearing on the roof with banners and… was that lit Molotov cocktails? Holy shit.

Calling in the molotovs, Bogo noted that was mobilizing the TUSK unit. It would arrive a bit after the riot gear. It turned out to fit rather well, as putting on the riot gear took a bit…

“Hey fluff, you ever put this stuff on in the field before?” Nick wondered, looking at Judy putting on her riot gear.

Tightening a few straps, Judy picked up her helmet: “No, not really. I’ve only had to gear up for a riot once, just after you left for the academy… I can tell you about that another time”

Fiddling around with his ‘turtle-suit’, Nick shifted himself around in the armoured carapace: He was reasonably mobile in it, but it did make running and jumping really difficult. The large reinforced plexiglass riot shield, even with his being fox-sized, also it made really hard to move quickly – Nick’s inner fox did not like this, in much the same way that he didn’t really like the notion that only the six of them were necessary, since the tents and the building clearly wasn’t meant for larger mammals, so a few cops with superior size should be able to handle everyone inside the office building.

McHorn, Trunkaby and the others didn’t seem that bothered by their riot kit – but then they were so much larger, so proportionally their gear didn’t weigh them down nearly as much.

“Don’t forget to take your shock wand” Judy noted, plugging hers into her body armor.

Nick looked at the oversized cattle-prod of a taser-stick. It had plug at the bottom that a loose cable from his armor slotted into, after which a tiny LCD display in the collar of his armor lit up showing “Wand charge 98%”

“Exactly how does this work? Our tasers usually don’t require a power supply” Nick wondered, looking at Judy who appeared to be far more familiar with the gear than he was.

With her helmet on, Judy felt ready to rumble: “The shock wands connect to the batteries in your backpack, that’s why it looks like a turtle shell – and you get hundreds of charges from that, not the usual two or three that our normal tasers have before we have to swap the battery or recharge it”

Putting his helmet on, Nick nodded, still feeling quite unease: The academy riot training had never covered mammals that threw Molotov cocktails at you – though that explained why Fangmeyer was hauling a big tiger-sized fire extinguisher with two small wheels on it.

McHorn took point, the rhino looking even more heavily armoured than usual. Trunkaby was to his right, and Fangmeyer to his left, with everyone else following behind their shield wall.

“Where’s the TUSK unit? Shouldn’t we wait for them?” Nick wondered out loud.

Fangmeyer shrugged, tipping her visor up: “Oh you didn’t hear? They’re stuck with engine trouble fifteen blocks from here. Bogo told us to start without them”  
Moving into the compound this was… different, tense. It was the expectation; the mammals up on the roof that were clearly waiting for you to come in range for the things they were planning on throwing at you.

First came the rocks and bricks. Huddled behind the riot-shields, the rocks just bounced off – but the moment that the first Molotov crashed into McHorn’s shield, lighting it up with bright orange flames all hell broke loose.

McHorn pulled back – everyone behind him having to leap out of the way or get stepped on. Fangmeyer hosed his shield down with the fire extinguisher, with Trunkaby managing to snatch another Molotov out of the air with her trunk and flick it off to the side.

“Nick, Judy, go around and find a way in – we’ll keep them occupied here in the front” Trunkaby shouted, punching through the flimsy wooden boards covering a window and tossing a tear-gas grenade inside.

As Nick and Judy made their around the building to the right, Nick just barely saw the tear-gas grenade coming back out the window. Lovely.

Knowing that the side-exits were blocked, Nick and Judy looked for low windows and vents. There weren’t really any, but suddenly Judy went: “There, look”

Nick just saw Judy running over to a… oh yes… basement window that was creaking open. Were there mammals trying to sneak out?

A small capybara was scrambling to get out, Judy grabbing him and pulling him up: “Got you!”

Now, Nick and Judy both clearly expected the young cabybara to struggle, resist, fight back or something similar. He did not do any of that: “Oh thank you!”

“What the… you’re welcome? What’s going on in there?” Judy asked, utterly confused.

Catching his breath, the capybara looked into the darkness of the basement, looking for something… and seeing nothing: “No… me and Lisa, we were trying to get out. They wouldn’t let us leave! They said we had to fight or we would be marked as traitors!”

Nick looked at the kid: “That’s nuts – how old are you kid?”

“I’m thirteen – my sister is sixteen, and she should have come out right after me…” the teenager explained, looking exceedingly worried.

While the duo wanted to trust the kid, then protocol for riots like this – even more so with siege situations – required that the capybara be cuffed. He didn’t protest much at this, happy to simply be out of the hellhole, but he did beg Nick and Judy to rescue his sister.

“This is Hopps, we found a way in – small basement window. It’ll fit me and Wilde, but not our shields. Got a kid out from in there who said that whoever is in charge isn’t letting those who want leave, and that they’re forcing everyone to fight us” Judy said over her radio.

“Roger – TUSK just showed up, we’ll try to open a hole or two for mammals to get out” McHorn’s voice sounded over the radio.

Nick wondered if the TUSK crew had simply walked the fifteen blocks as he and Judy crawled into the basement, leaving the capybara cuffed but well out of range of the mammals throwing stuff off the roof.

The basement was dark and the only real illumination was by the light coming in from the window.

“You see anything?” Judy asked quietly, her shock wand out and ready.

Drawing his weapon, Nick looked around as his eyes adjusted to the darkness: “Not seeing anyone – but there are bedrolls everywhere… did they sleep down here? It’s so damp”

Finding a door that led to a staircase, the two very carefully moved upstairs. Police protocol very explicitly warned against actions that could lead to officers being taken hostage, but with the kid outside begging them to rescue his sister and warning that innocent mammals were being forced to help fight against their will, then that took priority.

At the door to the ground level it was easy to hear the shouting and fighting going on at the front door. The duo wisely chose to not open the door.

“Nick, the Molotovs were all being thrown off the roof… do you think they have a stash of them?” Judy wondered, trying to think how the lioness had organized her defences.

Nick shrugged: “Would make sense – I mean, they seemed to have plenty to throw around when we were up in front it. If they didn’t have that many you’d think they would be more careful using them”

Going up to the stairs, past the second floor, the duo listened in at the top floor door. There was running in the halls, urgent shouts of “Be careful with those” and more than one crying sob going “I want to go home”. This sounded like the perfect place to start.

Crawling up on Nick’s shoulders, Judy was able to peek through the vent over the door: “I’m seeing… kids, bringing Molotov’s from the end of the hall over to the rooftop stairs”

Waiting a few precious seconds until Judy gave the all clear, the two burst in when the hall on the opposite side of the door was empty. Rushing to where the molotovs were being brought from, the duo found three mammals – a deer and a coati were busy pumping liquid out of a fifty gallon drum into empty glass bottles, while a very young, but also very large, female buffalo watched over them with a harsh glare who had a red armband on each arm – this was obviously a mammal in charge of something.

On the plus side, the three were very busy doing their own thing, so they didn’t really notice Nick and Judy sneaking up on them – though when Judy jammed her shock wand into the lower back of the buffalo girl, then the combined noises of the shock wand discharging and the buffalo doing the brief but energetic zapity-zap dance, the two others instantly stopped what they were doing – though they looked very unsure of what to do…

“Easy now – just put the bottles down and step away from the fuel drum” Nick ordered, knowing full well that with him and Judy in full riot gear they looked very imposing, so while he didn’t want the two to start screaming or calling for help, then he also needed them to step away from the Molotovs they were making.

The coati dropped the rags he had been stuffing into the bottles very quickly, shaking his paws: “Can I wash my paws before you cuff us? This kerosene stuff stings”  
Nick had to struggle to remain professional in the face of the request. It was such an innocuous request, and the tone clearly communicated that this had not been something that the coati had wanted to do.

The deer doe in return scoffed at the coati: “Oh you little traitor! …” she was about to shout for help when Judy leapt at her, zapping her down good.

“Fluff, what are we going to with these two? They’ll come to in minutes, and if they start screaming…” Nick asked, looking to Judy for a solution.

Nodding in agreement that having the buffalo and deer shout for help would be a bad thing, Judy looked around the room: Between dozens of boxes of empty bottles, a few filled Molotov cocktails, a basked full of torn rags and two fifty gallon drums, then there really wasn’t much for making gags.

“Oh nobody can hear that here… thick walls” the coati said in a thoroughly dejected tone, sounding uncomfortably as if he knew from his own experience that calling for help would fall on deaf ears.

About thirty seconds later, half a dozen mammal teens popped in through the door, expecting to receive more Molotovs for them to carry up to the roof. The coati managed to calm them down so nobody started shouting, after which Nick and Judy escorted all seven of them to the stairwell, leaving the deer and buffalo behind in cuffs.

Moving the kids down into the basement room and helping them out the window, Nick called in an update over the radio: “We’ve shut down their Molotov production – they have some fuel drums up on the top floor, but nobody’s filling bottles anymore. We have seven kids coming out via the basement window, they should be heading towards the gate – is there anyone who can receive them there?”

Bogo’s voice replied: “We’ll handle them – and after this is done we can talk about how stupid and dangerous it is to enter a building full of firebombers”

“Sir, it’s not all of them – the mammals we got out are kids. There are a lot of mammals in here who’re being forced to participate in this” Judy chimed in.

There was a brief pause before Bogo replied: “Understood. See what you can do about the roof. If you can shut that down we can storm the front and end this quickly – we don’t need this to drag out anymore than necessary now that the news vans have arrived – and find me that damn lion!”

Nick and Judy exchanged looks. Of course the news vans would show up the moment Molotovs started flying – the smoke could probably be seen all the way from Tundratown at this point.

Heading up the stairwell again, the duo first checked on the buffalo and the deer – discovering a goat trying to unlock their cuffs with a hairpin.

“You know, that only really works in the movies… you need a proper key for those” Judy noted as Nick gave the goat a poke with his shock wand.

Cuffing the goat, and ignoring the really colourful swearing and death-threats from the buffalo and the deer, Nick and Judy headed to the rooftop.

The flat roof of the office building was about as drab and uninteresting as any other commercial structure. There were some air-con ‘blocks’, drains for rain, and that was about it – oh and a dozen mammals lining the edge of the roof, tossing rocks down at the TUSK team trying to get to the front door.

With the roof-tossers’ backup already cut off, a quick look at the dozen or so mammals throwing rocks revealed everything the duo needed to know: It was eleven mammals throwing rocks and a hamster who might have been difficult to spot, if not for the fact that she was sitting on top of one of the rock piles, and was wearing tiny but bright red armbands and a tiny red bandana, cheering the larger mammals on quite enthusiastically.

Charging out from behind an air-con block, Nick and Judy managed to zap and down a yak and a tapir, as well as the hamster who barely even required a tap with the shock wand before her fur poofed out and she keeled over. 

Taken by surprise, most of the remaining mammals surrendered, dropped their rock s and stepped away from the edge – though two of them, a capybara and a very riled up pig, both turned their bricks on Nick and Judy. For Nick it wasn’t so bad: The riot gear was specifically made to absorb blunt impacts like thrown objects, kicks, punches or similar hits.

For Judy it was a little different, because the bricks were half her size, but between a little bit of dodging and a fair bit of luck, she was able to get close enough to swipe at the capybara’s paws with her wand, disarming the young lady from the next brick she had picked up. Nick wasn’t slow to exploit Judy taking down her quarry, the pig distracted by seeing his comrade in rocks going down, getting close enough to zap the hog until he too dropped to the floor.  
The rest of the mammals just stood relatively still with their paws and hooves up in the air.

“The roof is secured, I repeat the roof is secured!” Judy called in, while Nick broke out the zip-ties to cuff everyone.  
The reply was quick and succinct: “Roger. TUSK is go. Storm the barn”

It was difficult to see the charge down on the ground, but it sure made an awful lot of noise. A lot of roaring, shouting, screaming…

“I think TUSK is leading with flashbangs” Nick mused, peeking over the edge.

Judy shook her head: “Nah, they’ll lead with flashbangs and tear-gas”

As the minutes passed, the duo watched over the mammals they had captured, waiting for the all clear. The noise down from the front door slowly died down, occasionally punctuated by the kicking and screaming of someone being hauled out of the building towards the vans and trucks outside the gate.

From the roof all the police vehicles at the front gate to the compound were clearly visible. They formed a neat cordon, outside of which news vans with satellite dishes on their roofs were all neatly parked. This was so making the six-o-clock news, the nine-o-clock news, and then some. No wonder Bogo had shown up, his immense bulk impossible to miss out beyond the gate, even from up on the roof, as he ordered officers and arrestees around.

Suddenly the duo’s radios burst to life: “Ground floor clear – moving to sweep the second floor”

About fifteen seconds later a lion burst out of the door to the stairs down to the third floor. Oh what a sight he was to behold: His mane had been shaven off, he was wearing really poorly caked on make-up, also a very worn and ill-fitting halter top dress.

Nick and Judy waved: “Hi Djalo”

Djalo snarled at the duo, heaving to pull something heavy up from the stairs: A large lion-sized suitcase.  
Shock-wands out, Nick and Judy approached the lion. Judy didn’t mince words: “Djalo Simbason, you’re wanted for arson, attempted murder, conspiracy to terrorism and a ton of other things. You are under arrest!”

Snubbing his nose at the bunny, Djalo didn’t just stay put and await arrest – he ran towards the opposite end of the roof.

“Oh come on – you’re trapped up here. You should have run down the stairs if you wanted to… oh” Nick began, as Djalo tossed the suitcase off the roof down into the swimming pool.

With the riot gear impeding them, neither Nick or Judy could reach the lion before he too leapt off the roof down into the pool. What they could do was watch the lion drag his suitcase out of the pool, and then use it bash in a weak spot in the chain-link fence, squeezing through along with the suitcase.

“Bogo, Djalo is escaping east out of the compound through a hole in the fence – he came up on the roof but jumped off into the pool when he saw us” Judy franticly said over the radio.

There were officers at the fence holes fairly quickly – but the lion had disappeared into the suburban sprawl beyond the compound. There was no telling where he had hidden, or where he had run off to.

With the whole “catch Djalo” part of the operation officially failed, Nick and Judy began moving their captives down. TUSK finished their sweep of the second and third floor fairly quickly, most of the mammals in the building having amassed at the ground floor to bolster the defences – nobody had been allowed to simply hide or take cover. The worst the TUSK sweep found was a red arm-band wearing okapi ‘disciplining’ some other mammals who had been caught trying to hide from the fighting via vicious stick beatings.

Fifteen minutes later the front yard of the office building was festooned with zip-cuffed mammals sitting and waiting to be processed. Quite a few of them were crying, just wanting to go home, or sad that they had lost the battle because that was obviously the end of the world. Some were just angry and uncooperative, constantly trying to kick or headbutt at any officer who got too close – most of them ended up hog-tied, including the ornery hog from the roof-top.

The mammals slowly got processed – chiefly via reviews of body-cam video from TUSK and everyone else, to see who from the building had actually thrown stuff or otherwise made themselves guilty of assaulting an officer. For the mammals that had stood at the front door it was easy enough, though the ones from further inside it was ever so slightly trickier. Most of them had been wearing black balaclavas, making positive identification difficult.

It all boiled down to who could be charged with what, and what there was evidence of. Nick and Judy’s evidence was more than enough to see the hog and the teenage capybara girl sent off along with the others who were being charged with aggravated assault and whatnot. This left the young capybara boy in tears, seeing his sister being hauled away kicking and screaming.

“You said you’d come with me! Why didn’t you come!” the boy said, half-choking on his own tears.

The teenage girl had no pity for her little brother: “Oh shut up – I just said that to make you leave. You were useless to us in there!”

Of other notable arrests was the lioness and her lieutenants, all marked by red armbands and red bandanas…. The armbands did not look nearly as silly as the lioness’ torn sheep costume and sheep wool wig. The muzzle on her only added to her look, though it was on for good reason – the blood on her fangs told everything you needed to know about her part in the fighting.

Nick shook his head as he saw her being dragged away. She was hissing and wiggling as much as it was possible for a hog-tied lioness: “Damn… biting an officer. That means hard time no matter what, right?”

“Oh yes – I just hope whoever she got wasn’t hurt too much” Judy mused, taking off her helmet and shaking her ears.  
Walking to the riot gear truck to hand back their equipment, Nick and Judy found themselves halfway undressed when Bogo came over with a phone: “It’s Sleeves”

“Uhm… hi, you doing better?” Judy said, caught very much off guards by the sudden phonecall from someone she thought was too hurt to do anything.

The voice from the phone was weak, and the noise around from them the arrestees, news crews, and everything else, didn’t exactly help: “Hey, Bogo told me… told me about your work on the case. Great idea with the crop dusters. I need you to come in and talk with me”

And that was it – Sleeves ended the call before Nick and Judy could answer. The duo exchanged somewhat curious but also worried looks. Sleeves’ voice had been gravely, and he had only spoken in short sentences due to what had sounded like coughing.

“Bogo, he wanted us to come in and talk to him – got any idea what he wants with us?” Judy inquired, handing the buffalo-sized phone back to Bogo.

Relieving the bunny of the to her oversized phone, Bogo maintained his steely gaze over the thinning flock of arrestees: “No clue – but he apparently woke up after you two left for here. I called him, filled him in on what you had discovered. I suspect that he’s done some investigating from his sickbed and wants to clue you in on his findings”

“Ok – do we have permission to leave?” Judy wondered, Nick stretching a bit, finally free of the turtle suit.

The cape buffalo nodded. Nick and Judy drove off, at first slowly through the mass of news crews hovering around the police cordon. Nick couldn’t help but feel relieved over the tinted windows of the cruiser as they passed through.

Finding Sleeves was easy enough, and the hospital staff was nice and cooperative.

The room the coati was in was nice enough, despite the pungent smell of disinfectant and iodine. Sleeves himself looked like shit, his face still swollen and his right arm in a cast, much of him shaven from surgery. 

“Hey champ, heard you lost a fight with a lead pipe” Nick said jovially. Judy frowned, but eased up when she saw Sleeves smile.  
Pushing the button that made the bed curl up a little so he could sit up, Sleeves nodded at the duo: “Hey – great work on the case”

“Well almost – we lost the loyal fan after we ID’d him, DJalo Simbason, a lion. He’s on the run, APB is out, but we have no idea where he’s going” Judy said apologetically.

Nick couldn’t help but notice that Sleeves’ expression didn’t falter.

“S’ok – I know where he’s going” the coati said, coughing a bit as he gestured towards a notepad on the nightstand next to his bed.

The notes on the notepad had been jotted down during a phonecall with a crop duster drone manufacturer. Nick skimmed the notes: “Six drones ordered two months ago. Delivered four weeks ago at two locations, two at one and four at another”

The addresses on the notepad – they were the drones had been delivered…

“Sleeves – this… you think this is where Djalo is going?” Judy inquired, incredulous at the amazing find.

The coati groaned, but nodded: “Yup. Closest is an airfield, other side of Sundown bay”  
Punching in the addresses on Zoogle maps, Nick confirmed: “Right – a small airfield on the other side of the bay. The other spot is off the coast… fifteen miles from Stonetusk prison”

“Didn’t Honey’s notes talk about taking out Bellwether?” Judy noted.

Sleeves coughed: “Skvisen’s emails also did that, before they burned. Djalo got Skvisen to believe that Bellwether had to be taken out, and Skvisen sold that to Honey. Bogo said the recordings you got confirm that”

“Right, he must have been listening through those” Nick mused, feeling just a little happy that there were more than just him and Judy who were going through those recordings.

The silence that followed was only ever so slightly uncomfortable. Sleeves looked like he wanted to say something, but he was obviously still not feeling well.  
Looking at the duo, Sleeves finally coughed a bit more, then said: “Why are you still here? Go! If you shut down the drones at the airfields it doesn’t matter if he has any N2!”

“Of course! Right, come on Nick!” Judy said, tugging on Nick as they both broke into a mad dash to get out of the hospital as quickly as possible. 

Out in the parking lot, just as Judy was about to jump into the cruiser, Nick closed the door to the car: “Hold on fluff – you think we can drive over the Sunset bay?”

Judy gave Nick an angry look: “No I… What do you think you’re… calling?”

As Judy’s look turned from anger to confusion, Nick waited for whoever he had called to pick up.

“Hey Jack, its Nick. You wanna be a hero and save the city?” Nick said in the phone.


	15. Clipped Wings

Up on top of the hospital, at the helipad, Nick and Judy enjoyed the view of the city as they waited for Jack Savage to arrive.

“Exactly how did you know that he would have a helicopter?” Judy simply had to ask, because really, how could Nick have known?

Sitting down on the helipad, Nick popped the collar of his uniform: “I didn’t, but he did have to skip a number of days with us for his helicopter license training and his final exam…”

“Right – why get one if you weren’t planning on using it, ok that makes sense” Judy replied, sitting down next to Nick.

Suddenly Nick’s phone rang. It wasn’t Jack, it wasn’t Bogo – in fact, it was an unknown caller.

Judy looked at Nick, her brows furrowed. She knew that Nick had a protocol for unknown callers, a protocol originally devised to get rid of unwanted telemarketers and other similar callers. The reason that Nick got such calls was due to his small business. Sure, Nick had sold off everything he had owned in connection with all that from his hustling days before he joined the ZPD, but the company still existed on paper, and thus he would still occasionally get calls from mammals trying to sell him office supplies, to offer business investment opportunities – all of it quite unwanted, but apparently Zootopia’s laws on telemarketing wasn’t the same asfor private mammals when it came to businesses.

What Judy didn’t approve of was Nick’s method of getting rid of the telemarketers.

“Wilde’s Foxy Rent-boy service. You pay, we nut on or in you harder than a squirrel vomiting” Nick said in a frighteningly professional and serious, yet also brutally lewd and scandalous tone.

The bunny cringed. It was the only thing she could do to not giggle… and she really didn’t want Nick to know that she found his stunts like that hilarious.

“Nick I only paid you once for that because I needed predator semen for my counter-potion again sheep mind control waves... and how did you know it was me? This is a burn phone! Are you monitoring my brain waves again?” Honey rapidly replied over the speakerphone, as Judy shot Nick a very incredulous look.

Nick, realizing that while his joke had apparently succeeded far more spectacularly than expected, then Honey’s outburst had also just raised all kinds of questions he’d rather not answer to Judy, opted to turn off the speakerphone: “Relax Honey – you’re in the clear and I didn’t know it was you – you know I take the piss on all unknown callers”

The look in Nick’s eyes towards Judy was one of pleading and begging. Judy nodded: “Ok, but you’re going to tell me everything after this is over”

Nick mouthed “I love you” and then chatted on a bit with Honey. Judy quickly noticed that Nick name-dropped the crop dusters and their supposed locations, which apparently steered the conversation towards the topic of ‘the loyal fan’, who Nick also identified to Honey. Judy didn’t exactly approve of Nick revealing such things about an ongoing investigation, but she trusted him not to sabotage the investigation.

It turned out that he actually was – sort of. Finally putting the phone down, Nick looked at Judy with a dirty great smile on his face: “Guess what?”

“Honey got lonely and wants your hot hot pred spunk again?” Judy quipped, looking just ever so slightly smug, wanting to remind Nick that he still had to explain himself on that topic.

Nick’s smile faltered somewhat, but the fox explained what he had meant none the less: “No, but Honey basically skipped town after giving me that thumb drive – guess where she went?”

“Nick, just tell me” the bunny implored, not really feeling in the mood of guessing games.

Sighing, her partner explained that Honey was far east of the city, towards the coast. So far, that she wasn’t that far from where two of the crop duster drones were set up. Honey had apparently worked on the crop dusters, modifying them ever so slightly so their cargo canisters could be removed and re-inserted fairly easily, so you wouldn’t a need a pumping rig to refill them.

“…basically I talked her into sabotaging the two drones aimed at Stonetusk prison. I figured we might as well not leave those two hanging in the wind in case Djalo have more co-conspirators we don’t know about helping him” Nick noted.

While essentially destroying evidence, then Judy found it difficult to object. Shutting down this crop duster operation was critical for the safety of Zootopia: “Alright, but what about us? I’m starting to feel that it would be faster to have taken the ferry in the canal district”

Taping a few times on his phone, Nick brought up the schedule for the ferries across the bay: “They only leave once per hour, and take almost half an hour to cross, look”

Comparing ferry times with when Djalo had escaped from them, and how much time had passed, the duo concluded that Djalo’s headstart wasn’t actually that much – they would very likely get to their airfield first.

“Hey, when we get there – how are we going to stop the drones? Did Honey say if there was an off-switch?” Judy wondered, sounding all kinds of practical all of a sudden.

Nick shook his head briefly, but then made a throwing motion with his right hand: “I figured we throw something heavy at them and watch them blow up? If they’re jet powered you just need to get a rock into their intake”

The punch Judy landed on Nick’s right shoulder would probably end up leaving a nice bruise, but neither of them ended up paying much attention to that, as the sound of Jack and his helicopter appeared in the distance.

“You know, I’m not that familiar with helicopter designs, but that can’t be a standard model” Judy mused.

Agreeing, Nick noted: “It just shows that he’s a fine purveyor of vintage vehicular actions shows”

“Wait, so that’s from some TV show?” the bunny said somewhat incredulously.

Landing, Jack popped open the passenger door of his sleek black helicopter. Getting in, Judy got up into the cockpit next to Jack, while Nick had to stay in the cargo/passenger hold and strap himself down.

“Welcome aboard the airwolf!” Jack said, sounding way too giddy and excited, looking all spiffy in his flight jacket.

At first she paused – seeing Jack without his brown fur dye was weird. This was the real grey-furred, black check striped, Jack Savage… but then Judy showed the location they needed to go on her phone: “We need to be there yesterday – if we’re too late, Zootopia gets crop dusted with N2!”

“Holy shit, Nick wasn’t kidding was he?” Jack said, lifting off as fast as he could.

Looking out the window of the cargo hold he was in, Nick quickly noted that Jack wasn’t actually going that fast. Of course, with the helicopter in flight, then the noise inside the thing made simply shouting at Jack and Judy pretty much impossible – thus Nick texted his polite request of going faster to Judy.

It was a little strange for Judy to get a text from Nick when he was sitting right behind her – but ok, with her co-pilot helmet on she could only really hear Jack through the radio in her helmet. The message read: “We’re going way too slow – get speedy or the ferry will have been faster”

“Jack, can’t you go any faster?” Judy opened up with, not entirely familiar with the laws governing Zootopia’s airspace.  
Jack flicked a switch on one of the control panels: “Can’t or air traffic control will get really mad at me – don’t want to lose my pilot licence this quickly”

“Come on Jack – the city’s on the line here! If you get in trouble me and Jack will handle it!” Judy implored, not entirely certain how she or Nick would do that, but she figured that she could just argue that she and Nick commandeered the helicopter for the good of the city.

The look on Jacks face was anything but reassuring. Oh sure, he looked happy all of a sudden, but it was the somewhat maniacal kind of happy: “Seriously?”  
Judy was not really sure if she should, but she nodded.

Next thing the bunny knew, she was being forced into the back of her seat – it was as if an adult pig had sat on her chest! Struggling to breathe, she barely managed to look over at Jack who seemed to be thrust just far as she, though he had managed to hold on to the control stick of the helicopter.

For what seemed like an eternity the landscape zoomed past them at a truly frightening pace, from sky-scrapers to apartment buildings, it was all a blur. Not even the high speed car chase driving course Judy had taken had gotten anywhere near speeds like this! The city quickly faded into open water.

About twenty seconds later, and three quarters of the way over the Sunset bay, Jack’s rocket booster ran out, slowing the helicopter down to a more breathable velocity. Finally freed from the forces keeping her from breathing, Judy gasped for breath.

A couple of loud noises from the cargo hold followed, and seconds later a very frazzled looking Nick poked his head into the pilot’s cabin: “What the hell? Was that what I think it was?”

Waiting for the helicopter’s GPS to catch up with their new position, Jack gloated: “Oh yes… those rockets cost almost as much as the helicopter, but sweet cheese and crackers they were worth it!”

“That was so awesome” Nick said, in the most fanboy-ish tone ever.

Judy glared daggers at both of them – Jack for pulling such a stunt without warning her, and Nick for enabling Jack. It also didn’t help that Nick had sounded worryingly like Clawhauser talking about Gazelle for a brief moment.

Passing the shore to what was technically the south-eastern meadowlands, Jack pulled the helicopter up so that it could rise along with the foothills of the Bucktooth Mountain range, taking them in towards the Little Feather airfield.

“I think I can see it – there, look!” Judy said, pointing down towards what looked like a hill at the foot of one of the Bucktooth Mountains that had gotten its top shaven off and levelled off.

Approaching, the three saw that there were four small aircraft out on the main runway, set up in a square formation. A single mammal was standing next to one of them, doing something to the aircraft.

“Little Feather control, this is Officer Judy Hopps of the ZPD. I need you to halt all take-offs! There’s a wanted mammal about to lift off with a large amount of nighthowler poison in some crop dusters!”

There was no reply. The trio didn't know that Little Feather was only used by local farmers, and thus had no full-time staff.

As they got close, one of the aircraft on the runway began moving, and it was possible to tell that it was a lion running around between the remaining three ones.

“Shit, Djalo is already here! We have to stop that drone!” Judy shouted, tugging at Jack’s jacket frantically.

Pushing the control stick forward and pushing the pedal that made the helicopter descend, Savage looked nervously at the situation: “I can’t get any closer – it’s not safe”

“Screw safe – get down on the drone that’s going down the runway! Block it!” Judy commanded sternly, her grip on the flight jacket tightening.

It occurred to Savage that this was totally not a safe way to stop a plane taking off – and he was so going to get his precious paintjob ruined…

Touching down the helicopter in the middle of the runway, Jack spun the helicopter around so the tail of the helicopter faced towards the oncoming drone. At least the drone wouldn’t crash into the cockpit…

Judy was about to question the logic of facing away from the criminal, since they couldn’t really see what was going on, when an absolutely horrible noise of shearing metal and splintering fibre-glass resins. The noise was so sudden, it ended just as quickly.

A red light blinking in the pilot cabin made Jack look all kinds of sad.

“Did we stop it?” Judy said, trying to look back – but only seeing the passenger cabin, where Nick was looking all kinds of spooked over the previous noise burst.

Lowering his head, Jack half-heartedly nodded: “Ya, and my tail rotor is gone…”

“Well then we just have to bust this crook” Judy said, fiddling with her five-point seat belt.

Joining Nick in the back, the two officers waited for the hydraulics in the door to open fully. It felt like it took forever…

“Come on Jack – we can’t let this guy get away!” Judy shouted, bouncing back and forth with her tranq-gun ready.

Looking back at the duo from the pilot cabin, Jack could only really shrug: “Sorry, but I’m losing hydraulic pressure – when the tail rotor broke something must have sprung a leak”

Pushing on the door to make it open a little faster, the duo finally got out and were able to have a look at the scene:

The tail rotor of the helicopter was indeed completely trashed, as was the tail of the helicopter – but so was the drone that had crashed into the helicopter, the two aircrafts having chopped into each other as the tail rotor and the drone’s nose-mounted propeller had duked it out. Nick quickly noted that the drone was a lot bigger than the ones he had seen in Bunny Burrow.

“It’s sized for large mammals –means they can carry a bigger payload too” Judy noted, checking to see if there were any fuel leaks.

Suddenly another drone sprung to life, its engine turning on – but it didn’t just start going down the main runway… it began to turn away to one of the smaller runways.

“Crap – we have to stop it!” Nick says, looking around frantically for anything to throw at the drone like he had originally talked about. Unfortunately then bright minds had figured that loose objects on an airfield was a generally really bad idea, so there weren’t any idle rocks lying around to throw. Of course, there was a wrecked drone right next to him!

Pulling open a panel on the drone, Nick yanked out a big metal gizmo. He had no idea what it was, or what it did, but it was large, ostensibly made of steel, and he could just manage to lug it towards the drone taking off.

Once close enough, Nick did his best and worst shot-put imitation, spinning around before tossing the gizmo at the drone. The machine part flew wide, seemingly overshooting the drone, before clipping one of the propellers which shattered with a mighty plastic snap! Fibre-resin shrapnel flew everywhere.  
With a propeller busted, the whole drone began to bob up and done – being shook apart by the sudden uneven weight being spun around at the front of it. Weering off to the side, it tipped into a ditch where it got stuck.

“Yes!” Nick triumphantly shouted, not taking notice of Judy having run off looking for Djalo. 

That was when the remaining two drones started and began to roll towards the secondary runway. Groaning, Nick once again looked around for anything to stop the drones with, coming up empty.

Meanwhile, Judy approached the hangar where it seemed that the drones had come out of. She knew full well that if she didn’t catch Djalo, then he would probably try do something like this again later on.

“Give it up Djalo. It’s over – we have enough evidence on you and Skvisen to put both of you away for good” Judy shouted, not really expecting the lion to surrender, but simply trying to throw him off his game.

It was one of the most important lessons Judy had been taught at the academy, and practiced many times during her career as a police officer: When hunting a predator larger than yourself, it was critical to let them know they are the prey – it messes with their minds, and would throw them off their game in case they try to strike back

In the case of stalking a lion, the trick was that Judy knew that lions weren’t shy of doing the ambush predator thing – but lying in ambush of prey that didn’t expect you was one thing, lying in ambush of someone who was hunting you was very different.

A metallic clatter over behind some crates alerted Judy’s sensitive hearing. Ignoring it, because the sound had obviously come from a small object having been thrown to distract her, Judy continued, her tranq-gun at the ready and her ears peeled. She knew the difference between a metal bolt hitting tarmac and the clicking of unsheathed claws on the same material.

Outside, Nick had run up behind one of the drones, the one in front. It was still going slowly enough that he could keep pace with it. It was at this point that he wished that he had a real bladed dart with him, because aiming his normal tranq-dart at the drone’s single rear tire didn’t really seem like that safe a bet to stop the damn thing.

Indeed, shooting the dart at the tire, while half-running, Nick missed – the dart just plinking off the tarmac. Lovely. Looking desperately at the drone for another way to stop it – knowing full well that he had another drone behind him that he needed to stop as well.

Opting to do something stupid instead of just doing nothing, Nick jumped up on the drone. The sudden shift in weight made the drone unbalanced, making it swerve a bit to the right, but the onboard computer controlling the thing quickly got it back on the right course. Looking for some kind of hatch, like the one he had opened on the first drone, Nick found it, but also found it far more securely closed. This drone wasn’t damaged.

Back in the hangar, Judy figured that her best option was getting to a good vantage point. She didn’t know if Djalo was armed, though she knew that as a lion he had the claws and teeth… and honestly she didn’t need more incentive to be careful than that.

Jumping up on some boxes and barrels, Judy made her way towards what looked like a crane assembly. From her new vantage point she could see the whole hangar… and while it wasn’t terribly lit, then the front of it was open, so there was plenty of light flooding in – and she could not see any lions. How could a lion hide this well?

Outside, Nick was trying and failing to wrestle the drone he was riding on. That damn access panel hadn’t budged, and without being able to get into the guts of the drone, then there didn’t seem to be a way to stop it.

It also totally didn’t help that he only had his tranq-gun, a few spare darts and his taser.

Ok, quick thinking time. The drone was speeding up – Nick would have to jump off soon, or he would get a ride back to Zootopia. He had his radio? Could he jam the drone? No, back in Bunny Burrow the drones had been hooked up with a cable…

…cable connection meant a socket!

Looking around, Nick found the socket down by his belly. It was a big socket, lion sized – Nick could easily fit two fingers into it. Oh what do you know, his taser almost fit into it as well, at least enough for him to zap it good.

The drone didn’t react that well to having the connection to its onboard computer tased. In fact, it objected rather abruptly, shutting down completely. As the propeller slowed down, Nick breathed a sigh of relief and tried to dislodge his taser from the socket. Of course it was stuck… and that second drone was coming up from behind!

Bailing from the drone, Nick leapt off and rolled around on the ground before coming a halt. Asphalt wasn’t the most pleasant material to do that on, but his uniform got the worst of it, getting ripped and torn all over. That was when the second drone slammed into the rear of drone Nick had jumped off, the propeller chopping into the tail of the front drone quite spectacularly. Metal and plastic splinters flew everywhere, and a fuel line must have been nicked at some point, because the front drone caught fire half-way through the chopping. As the rear drone’s propeller spread burning fuel around like a flaming water fountain, Nick suddenly found himself surprisingly well motivated to get the hell away from the two drones.

The fire fountain died down as the remains of the rear drone’s propeller ground itself away. Despite technically not shutting down, the rear drone was at this point blocked by the front one, on fire, and had almost no propeller left – so Nick considered all four drones neutralized.

“Judy, the drones are down – how’s the lion hunt?” Nick asked for his radio.

Judy, up from her vantage point, scanned the hangar once more: “I can’t find him – and he’s way too big for us to tangle with directly. Get a message to Bogo, get some big backup here so we can do a proper sweep”

Checking his phone, Nick grimaced. The screen had a nice big crack in it. He must have landed on his phone when he jumped from the drone. Anywho, no dice: “Sorry fluff – I have no bars. I think we’re thoroughly in the sticks here”

“Damn-it. Ok, get back to Jack – the radio in his chopper is more powerful – he should be able to call for backup” Judy instructed, sounding exceedingly not enthused by the bad news.

Looking around, Nick wondered where Djalo had hidden. There was only the single hangar building. There wasn’t any other structures at the airfield… it wasn’t exactly a big place. Hurrying over to Jack’s helicopter Nick found it… vacant. Also the claw marks around the cockpit sort of gave away what had happened. At least there wasn’t any blood.

“Judy… I need you out here. Jack is gone, Djalo got him” Nick called over the radio.

Inside the hangar Judy cursed herself for not giving Jack the frequency to talk to them over the radio on their flight to the airfield – he would have been able to call for backup, and alert the duo to Djalo trying to take him: “Oh fig-biscuits… ok, I’ll circle around and try to stay hidden. We need Jack to use the radio in his chopper to call for backup”

Nick checked the passenger hold in the chopper, nope – nobody there. Where the hell had Djalo hidden? There was at least a hundred yards to the hangar. Had Djalo been able to get to the chopper, nab Jack, then get back to the hangar that quickly? And without being spotted?

…then again, those drones had been really damn noisy, and Nick hadn’t exactly been looking towards Jack’s helicopter all the time.

“Judy, they’re not out here – are there any places in the hangar you haven’t checked?” Nick said over the radio, feeling really stupid that he hadn’t paid attention to the helicopter.

Taking a deep breath, Nick reloaded his tranq-gun and methodically made his way towards the hangar. The idea of Jack getting hurt from this really sat badly with Nick. Not only because he considered Jack a sort of friend, but also because it was Nick who had roped Jack into all of this, and press-ganging civilians into police work was about as big a no-no as it got…

“Nick, a light just came on in one of the offices” Judy said over the radio.

Hurrying to the hangar, Nick looked for the source of light: “I see it. You approach from above, I’ll come in low”  
The office in question was a very plain one, with what looked like thin plywood walls and plastic windows. The plastic windows looked dirty, stained from what was probably slightly corrosive airplane engine exhaust. The dirt on the windows made them slightly opaque, making sneaking up easy, and the thin walls made eaves-dropping even easier…

“Come on – you saw it yourself. The drones are gone, and I heard them on the ride here talk about having someone sent to disable the drones at your other place. Just give yourself up – don’t make this worse for yourself” Jack said, sounding remarkably calm.  
Nick whispered into his radio: “They’re there – Jack is talking, what’s your status?”

“On top of them – we need them separated for a safe takedown” Judy replied in a very hushed tone. Nick knew this was the best way: When dealing with a much larger mammal who had a hostage, then a head on confrontation would likely only end badly, since the lion had both a shield and much bigger claws which could take out both Nick and Judy quite easily, if given the chance. 

Doubting that the office had any ceiling window for Judy to burst in by, Nick had a close look at the door and the windows: The door was for larger mammals. He would be able to open the door, but it would no doubt be spotted… and it look like a creaky door, if those rusty hinges were any indications. The plexiglass windows, plastic… a cheap shatterproof solution, in case anything in the hangar blew up. No bursting in through those.

Circling around the office, Nick found that one of its walls were part of the hangar structure. Hmm… he hadn’t seen any vents on the ‘inside walls’. Quickly darting outside and around, Nick spotted a vent at the right spot.  
…and it was nice and poorly maintained, so it came off with just a few tugs and pulls, without any real noise.

“Judy, I found a vent outside. Pretty sure it leads inside to the office. Do you have a way in?” Nick said over the radio.

On top of the office, Judy frowned – annoyed doubly that she couldn’t express her frustration by tapping her feet, since that would give her away: “No, there’s no vents or anything… but the ceiling looks like it’s as thin as the walls. I can probably get through it if I jump up first”

“Copy that. I can see Jack and Djalo through the vent. I’ll spot for you” Nick replied, looking at the actor and the lion talk, and listening intently.

Inside the office, Djalo paced about furiously, looking as unsure of what to do with his paws, as he seemed unsure of what to do in general: “Fuck fuck fuck…”

“Oh calm down. Aren’t you supposed to be a great mastermind? Skvisen’s great mysterious ‘loyal fan’ and whatnot?” Jack said, his tone somewhat condescending, like a disappointed teacher admonishing a student who wasn’t grasping a key lesson.

Nick found himself somewhat amused, but also intrigued: Djalo was supposed to be keeping Jack as a hostage, right? This did not look like a hostage… but ok, it did make Djalo pace around, which meant that there were windows of opportunity when the lion was out of reach of his hostage.

“Oh screw you. I’m just a messenger. Skvisen was a moron who ate all the bullshit I served to him raw. I answer to a higher cause, and your friends just ruined everything!” Djalo shot back with a choked up voice, looking and sounding as if he was about to cry.

Jack shook his head and gave the lion a derisive snort: “Please. Take some credit for your work here. And higher cause? To what, have Zootopia fuck itself to death? Spreading the love by any means necessary?”

With a half-roar, Djalo took a firm step towards Jack: “You have no idea what we were planning! And you are nothing but my ticket out of here, so how about you start acting like it and call for another chopper?!”

“With what? The radio is in my helicopter, not in here milady” Jack deadpanned, sounding oh so not impressed with Djalo’s exit strategy so far.

Nick clenched his grip around his tranq-gun as Djalo fumed some more, raving about how he had only pretended to have come out as transsexual to the lunatics at the commune so they would hide him. But really, why was Jack taunting the lion like this? What was his gameplan? Was he just trying to draw out the conversation to buy himself time? Or… was he expecting that… hold on.

“Judy, you saw Jack use the radio in the helicopter – you think you can do that yourself, and call for help? You’re the right size for the gear” Nick whispered over his radio.

There was silence for a few seconds, before Judy replied: “Why didn’t you do that when you were looking for Jack?”

“Bunny sized gear – I can’t fit into the cockpit, or the headset – you need to do this before Djalo gets tired of Jack’s snark” Nick replied while Jack sassed the lion again.

Judy snuck off the roof, and ran to the helicopter.

Inside the office, Jack once again reminded Djalo of his own lack of access to a radio: “We have to get back to the helicopter if you want me to call for a ride out of here”

Nick couldn’t quite hear what Djalo grunted in return, but he could see Djalo picking up Jack and going for the door.

“Judy, they’re heading for the helicopter!” Nick spoke over the radio, his voice less hushed than before, now that Djalo and Jack were out of the door.

Judy didn’t reply to begin with, so Nick snuck out of the vent, trying to follow Djalo – but when he got around into the hangar he found that the lion was using cover quite expertly. No clear shot.

“Nick, I’ve called things in. City Air Control wasn’t happy about the rocket boost, but now Bogo knows where we are and is coming – he’s making the local sheriff send everything he’s got” Judy’s voice came through on the radio.

Nick kept his eyes locked on where he was reasonably sure that Djalo was going as he spoke into his radio: “Djalo and Jack are coming to you! They’re going for the radio. Can you disable it? Like, just pull a plug or something, don’t break it – we might need it later – then get out of there”

“I can do something like that…” sounded the reply from Judy.

As Djalo got to the front gate of the hangar, he looked around himself very carefully. His behaviour made Nick wonder if the lion had received training in how to dodge tranq-darts or something – because as the lion ran to the helicopter, he was ducking, weaving, zig-zagging, plus he appeared to be wearing a long heavy coat, all of which made nailing him with a dart pretty much impossible.

“He’s heading to the chopper with Jack as hostage – where are you?” Nick called in, standing at the mouth of the hangar.

“I’m at the chopper, pulled the helmets out – no radio headsets. Can you get up here? I have an idea for a trap” Judy replied, sounding all kinds of confident.

Nick frowned. How was he supposed to get up to the chopper? Hmm… ok, a bee-line was out of the question, but there was the drone wreck at the rear of the helicopter, and the cock-pit was facing away from the hangar. Once Djalo was out of sight, Nick made his move: “Coming – what’s the plan? Djalo has a big coat on, difficult target”

“Just get up here, wait for the signal, go for a clean shot when he turns around” Judy replied over the radio, as Nick got up behind the drone that had crashed into the rear of the chopper.


	16. The Last Word

Djalo Simbason roared in rage, as Jack pointed out that the radio headsets in his helicopter were gone.

“Well don’t blame me – they were here when you came and nabbed me. If you had let me call for a pickup then, we wouldn’t have this problem. Shouting isn’t going to help” Jack pointed out, giving the lion a very disapproving glare from inside the cockpit.

The lion swiped at the cockpit wind-shield, leaving long scratches: “No! Isn’t there a backup?”

“Sure, but what we’re missing are microphones and speakers – the headsets. The radio is working just fine, but we can’t talk to it” Jack reiterated, sounding as if he had explained this more than once already.

Behind the chopper, behind the crop duster drone that had crashed into the tail end of the helicopter, Nick had found Judy. She had her carrot pen, and a plan. Nick liked the plan, but didn’t like the risk it involved.

“We don’t have a choice – with no radio Djalo is going to pop soon. I don’t know what Jack has on the lion to make him treat him so nicely, but it won’t last forever” Judy whispered.

Nick peeked under the helicopter, seeing two heavy work boots stomping around – no tranq darting anyone in the legs: “Well… we were told that he’s a movie nut. Probably doesn’t want to hurt a big name actor. Plus, he’s inside the cockpit, out of reach of him right now”

“True. Just means that he’ll want to vent his anger on us… we can use that – ok, you go left, I’ll go right” Judy said, carefully sneaking off.

Sighing, Nick rubbed his temples and checked his tranq-gun. This was so not how he had imagined this day going, as he snuck off to the left around the crashed drone.

Going each their own way around the drone wreck and helicopter, Judy silently hugged the hull of the helicopter, sneaking around under the nose of the black helicopter. Drawing her carrot pen and quickly rewinding it to the right point, she clicked the play button and tossed it into the sand just at the edge of the runway.  
“Hey Djalo, paws up!” the small speaker in the carrot pen sounded.

With a roar the lion spun around, eager for a target to vent his growing frustration, his claws unsheathed… and found nothing.

That was when Nick whistled at the lion: “Hey genius, want to know where we hid the headsets?”

Instantly Djalo shot the helicopter cockpit a furious look, slamming a fist into the windshield. It shattered quite impressively, letting the lion grab on to the bunny inside: “Give me the headset or the buck gets it!”

Now, the original plan had been for Djalo trying to chase Nick – the goal was to have Djalo distracted, so Judy could come up from behind and nail him with a tranq-dart from under his coat. That wasn’t what had happened, but as they had been taught at the academy: The first thing to die at a bust or raid was usually the battle plan.

Still, Djalo was without a doubt distracted – focused completely on Nick, though he was also holding his hostage…

Darting out from under the nose of the helicopter, Judy ran up under the lion. Seeing his partner, Nick played his last card, aiming his tranq-gun at Djalo: “Let him go!”   
With a wicked smile, the Lion boasted: “Do I look intimidated? The T-14 needs a goo……”

The tranq-dart in his femoral artery had worked spectacularly quickly, the lion’s grip on Jack’s head slipping.

He didn’t quite collapse on the ground, due to his arm being getting caught in the broken cockpit windshield window, but the lion did slump down hard. Still, the lion was down, all was good… right?

Just as Nick was about to let out some kind of joyous shout or yip, a ‘pop’ behind him disrupted him. Spinning around, Nick saw the crashed drone billowing smoke…

“Judy, the drone is fire!” Nick noted, not shouting, but speaking in a very alarmed and slightly raised tone of voice.

Crawling out from under the slumped down lion’s coat, Judy popped her head up, her nose sniffing. Yup, that was smoke. Looking over at Nick and the crashed drone, Judy shouting: “The headsets!”

“Of course you hid them in there… of course” Nick said, as he rushed over to Judy and began tugging at Djalo – couldn’t have the lion getting blown up or torched.  
From inside the cockpit, Jack peeked out the hole in the cracked windshield window. The window itself was an opaque web of cracks in the hardened glass: “Fire? What? I can’t see anything in here”

“Jack get out of there – the drone is one fire” Judy urged, having barely finished the word ‘fire’ before Jack had popped the windshield window open, Djalo’s arm slipping out and making the whole lion flop over on the ground with only a few minor cuts from the broken glass.

The three of them hauled Djalo into the grass next to the runway – not an easy feat – the lion was three times as heavy as the ram the duo had tried to drag around at ZU a couple of months early, but this time they were three, and there was a fire. Adrenaline was a hell of a drug.

Half-way from the helicopter to the edge of the runway, the drone ‘popped’ again – the fuel tank bursting due to the heat. The explosion from the fumes inside was minor – it was more of a ‘look at the drone wreck, its leaking liquid fire” type of thing.

Jack groaned as he saw the tail of his helicopter get barbequed: “Can I bill this guy for all these damages?”

“You can bill the ZPD. We’ll try to bill him and whoever’s been giving him orders… I’m sure Skvisen has enough money to cover this” Judy noted, recalling Djalo having talked about ‘serving a higher cause’ and whatnot.

With a strained sigh of almost-relief, Nick looked at the fire and the lion: “Let’s be realistic… if whoever was giving him marching orders are half as good at covering their rears and destroying evidence, then we’re not going to find anything”

A loud bang from the drone interrupted their chit chat, a splash of blue fluid from inside the burning drone wreck choking some of the fire for a brief moment, before it boiled away. Some of the splash splattered about halfway out towards where the trio was standing.

“Was that…” Judy said slowly, the shock of the sudden sound having caught her off guard.

“Was that the N2 canister popping due to pressure-cooking? Yes, yes it was” Nick noted with wideeyed terror, looking at the liquid blue toxin dripping out of the wreck into the fire, boiling away into puffs of black and blue soot.

Jack shuddered: “Holy crap… that is a lot of nighthowler juice. Thank cheeses it didn’t reach us… my butt isn’t ready to be turned into a foxhole”

“Don’t knock it until you try it” Judy quipped, poking Jack with an elbow.

The buck’s expression was a somewhat shocked and perplexed one, followed by a very forced and still nervous laugh.

It took another half hour before the local sheriff and a squad car showed up. Together they cordoned off the airfield, not that they expected anyone else to show up any time soon.

An hour later Bogo, ZPD backup, and a healthy troop of CSIs showed up, taking over the crime scene.

As Djalo was hauled off, heavily cuffed and muzzled , the lion seemed resigned to his failure – yet he was also oddly quiet and cooperative. He didn’t resist his arrest at all.

Once the duo and Jack left the airfield and got closer to civilization, and got into places with proper cellphone coverage, their phones sprung to life. Nick and Judy had several messages and missed calls from Bogo and Clawhauser. Jack had a ton of message from the mammals working for him, including his press secretary, his manager, several studio contacts and so on, most of which were worried sick about him.

Calling Honey on the number she had called him earlier, Nick checked on the status of the other drones. She didn’t pick up so he left a message about Djalo and the four drones being neutralized. A few moments later he got a text message from a different number: “I’m keeping these. Totally for legal purposes, of course, also tossing the phone. Smell you later”

One painfully slow but blissfully uneventful ferry ride back to Zootopia later, Nick and Judy parted ways with Jack. The actor understood well enough that come Djalo’s trial he’d most likely be called as a witness, and the prosecutor would probably want a statement from him post haste.

“Got it. Would it help that I recorded most of what he said to me on this?” Jack said, pulling out his smartphone.

Nodding with no small amount of bemusement as she copied the audio recording from the phone, Judy agreed: “Yes, but you’ll still have to give a statement about what you did – though having that to corroborate things will probably help a lot”

“Yes – but why would you even think to record everything like that?” Nick wondered, yawning as the ferry let out of a loud honk to signal that it was about to leave again.

The actor looked at his phone, his brows furrowing: “I work in Vinewood… lots of mammals there say all kinds of stupid things. Being able to tie them down to what they actually said is a powerful thing to have for contract negotiations, plus if he did kill me… you know, even if he at first didn’t want to hurt me since he said he was a big fan of me, so he didn't want to miss out on my future movies”

Nick and Judy both nodded.

Jack was picked up by a limo shortly there-after. Nick and Judy got a ride on it back to the hospital, where they checked in on Sleeves – or tried to. Even with the nurses being willing to disregard that normal visiting hours were over, then the coati was asleep at the time, so the duo opted to leave a message and take their cruiser back to precinct one.

“Wow… you two look like you had a rough day” Clawhauser noted, the late afternoon sun casting long shadows into the lobby of the precinct.  
At this point, Nick and Judy weren’t even tired. They just needed two coffins and a mortician. Realising that his two friends weren’t just somewhat pooped, the cheetah didn’t push for any greetings from his two colleagues as they walked out the front door.

It was probably from coming down from the adrenaline high, in combination with the having gone through two big police actions in the same day, but Nick barely managed to drag himself into bed, let alone get his clothes off – so when a fridge-chilled can was put on his nose he at first recoiled in shock, but then his reaction slowed down to match his lethargy: “Judy… what the hell?”

“Drink” Judy simply said, accompanied by the sound of a can being popped open and Judy drinking something.

Looking down himself, Nick saw Judy, naked, holding a can of energy drink out towards him, while she was chugging one of her own.

“Fluff I am tired as fuck… can’t this wait?” Nick pleaded, having a reasonably good idea of where this was headed.

Judy swallowed and tossed her empty can: “And I’m fuck ass tired – come on”

It wasn’t the first time that the duo had unwound from a very stressful day of work with sex, not by a long-shot, but for once Nick was simply so damn tired: “Judy, what is it with you and butt stuff?” 

“I love the sound you make when I clench around your knot” Judy whispered, as she leaned up to Nick’s face, looking as if her energy drink had already kicked in.  
Popping his can and an erection, Nick could only smile.

The next day in the bullpen Bogo went over the after-action reports with everyone on the day shift: “…and after processing the mammals apprehended at the office building, a total of forty six arrests were made, based primarily on bodycam footage. Wolfworld, Trunkaby and Grisoli, I need you to go through the rest of the footage, especially from the TUSK team. Wilde, Hopps, Fangmeyer and Clawford, you get to take statements from the thirty or so other mammals from the raid down in the holding cells who want to testify”

Basically it was all about cleaning up from the raid on the office building.

Beyond that, Bogo also had an update from the airfield: The drone that had caught on fire was a total loss, and the one that Nick had tazed to shut down didn’t have any real evidence left in its memory either since it had been fried. The two other drones though, they had full flight plans showing how Djalo had wanted them to hose down Zootopia with N2: “Also, the prosecutor handling all that wants to talk to you, and I think she also wants the contact information of your… pilot… who flew you to the airfield. City air-traffic control also has a bone to pick with him, but I do believe that we can smooth that over with them”

That Bogo didn’t reveal that it was Jack Savage was probably to maintain morale and discipline – though both Nick and Judy were happy to hear that Bogo was positive about sorting things out with city air-traffic control.

Another surprise towards the end of the morning briefing was Sleeves showing up in a wheelchair. He still looked like shit: Pale, right arm in a sling, both legs in a cast – but he was all smiles, IV drip and all.

For Nick and Judy the rest of the day ended up being spent taking statements and registering potential witnesses from all the mammals that had been taken in from the office or commune raid as Sleeves called it. Bogo had stressed that since they could only be held for twenty-hours unless they were charged with anything, then it was important to get to them before that time ran out.

This was not to intimidate them – it was the other way around: The idea was to give each of the kids a private and safe environment to speak freely about what they had seen and done at the commune, without any of the lionesses lieutenants around to intimidate them into silence – and the information gleamed via these interviews was very interesting.

It turned out that Djalo had been a regular at the commune. Him and the crazy lioness had apparently once dated – though after she had snapped and figured herself an eve he had broken off their relationship. He had supposedly turned up at the commune, looking to hide, with an obviously made up story about having been discriminated at work over his ‘recent’ discovery that he was in fact a lioness.

“You know, I’ve heard some strange lies and excused from criminals in the past… but that one takes the carrot cake” Judy noted, as she reviewed the video recording of the teenage llama telling the story.

Nick found it difficult not to crack a smile: “Well he did look adorable in that dress… too bad he swapped it for the boot and coat look on the way to the airfield”

The mammals from the raid who had been charged were processed later, the body-cam footage showing pretty much of all them quite obviously throwing rocks, glass bottles and lit fireworks at police officers. The testimony from the other mammals was equally damning, at least for the leadership and the lioness – everywhere who had worn a red armband had been part of forcing the others into fighting for them. The list of charges against them was vast and mindboggling. Everything from a near endless amount of assaulting an officer charges, to several dozen counts of unlawful imprisonment – for denying others the right to leave – and then some. The tales of horror spun by the many members BERSERC, especially when it had come to disciplining mammals that had failed on their tasks or hadn’t managed to pass the random mental purity tests, were legion. The lioness and her lieutenants had not just tried to control everyone’s actions, but also their minds – all in the righteous name of their cause, and for the lioness’ cult of personality.

This brought up the lioness. She had no name – refused to give any, and her paw-prints and DNA didn’t show up in any criminal databases – and her mental exam at lockup had confirmed that she was deeply disturbed: Narcissistic personality disorder, sociopathic, and with delusions of being a sheep. A wonderful combination for a cult leader who wanted to reshape Zootopia in her own twisted image.

Some of the lieutenants had also had changes of heart – they wanted to testify and cut deals. They would get their chance in due time, but that all depended on how merciful the prosecutors were feeling. Nick and Judy had nothing to do with that – as far as they were concerned, then it was back to normal.

Well… almost. The whole city had seen the rocket boosting helicopter screaming over the city, to put it mildly, as well as the “Battle of the BERSERCers” at the office building commune. It hadn’t been difficult to identify the helicopter as one owned by Jack Savage, which brought the Vinewood media machine into play – but none of that was Nick or Judy’s issue either.

Bogo handled the press conferences, explaining the conspiracy that Detective Sleeves had unravelled. At Judy’s request and urgings, her and Nick had been largely omitted in the press conference – Judy feared a repeat of her last press conference blunder two years ago. Their names would come up once the court proceedings started – but at that moment they were enjoying their peace and quiet.

Well, as much peace and quiet you could get when you were dragging and a kicking and screaming elderly goat out of his home and office – oh and it looked like someone had tipped off the press beforehand, whoever could that be?

“…and I’ve just been informed that Simbason’s co-conspirator and money-man Jakob Skvisen of Vinewood fame has been arrested. Him and Simbason will be prosecuted to the full extent of the law for trying to effectively destroy the city. Conspiring to dose the entire city in Nighthowler extract is a very serious crime” Bogo pointed out, looking just a tiny bit smug behind his usual stern exterior.

On their ride back to Precinct One, Judy wondered if they would ever meet Jack Savage again: “I mean, he was fun to hang out with”

“Fluff, didn’t you check your email before we rolled out for this? He sent an invitation to both of us for a ‘victory celebration’ this weekend on Saturday at his mansion” Nick pointed out, glancing back at Skvisen sitting in the back of the cruiser, pouting furiously.

...

Two days later, on an idle and quite peaceful Thursday, in a luxurious office overlooking most of Zootopia, two shadowy figures were having a conversation:

"Simbason failed, and the drones at the country airfield are gone as well – the plan is a complete failure”

“No, the plan is still in action – Djalo knows well enough to stay quiet, and doesn’t know enough to incriminate us even if he talks”

“Does he still think he ‘infiltrated’ both the BESERC and anti-drug conspiracy with Skvisen on our behalf?”

“Yes, and that means he thinks he’ll get killed if he talks, especially once he’s sent to prison and has to live tail to tail with all the real criminals there. Plus the press is doing a fine job of keeping everyone afraid and on edge right now. The city is in just as much of a panic as it was two years go thanks to Bogo’s press event. This is the first major press coverage that ‘N2’ has gotten. Our media division will maintain this”

“So what’s the new plan? Same as before with someone else? We’ll need to acquire more N2 for that, and a new patsy to round it up for us”

“No, that method won’t work anymore. The city council will be clamping down on private drone use after this, and the police will probably get some anti-drone toys – but all that won’t be necessary”

“It won’t? What are you thinking?”

“The test run at ZU earlier was successful – that will be our new vector“

“But isn’t Bogo still suspicious about that, with the recall order? And BERSERC was crushed – Djalo should have gone straight to the airfield, not tried to hide there”

“Bogo can’t pin that on us – and the excuse he got, while not ideal, was ultimately good enough. But yes, Djalo screwed up, though he needed time to safely pour the stuff into the duster canisters after he torched his lab. Anyway, we won’t have to rely on a potential single point of failure next up. Plus the ZU test case also showed that our media blackout system worked”

“Yes, though I am concerned because Pecker is already under investigation for censorship- and the lioness and her thugs could barely muster up a hundred or so – they could barely make for a single riot. We’ll need more if we’re to get the whole city that way” 

“There are plenty of potential assets that can rise up if told the right things, and trust me, I have full control of Pecker. We still have our ‘recruiters’ in the ZU social studies departments and via social media, and that lunatic lioness wont remain locked up for long”

“How can you be sure that she’ll get off light, considering her charges? I hear that the evidence is quite damning”

“She’s insane – she’ll be put in a mental institution, not a prison. I’ll make sure that happens. She’ll be out and about, gathering a new following of goons and... what are they called on social media these days? Dindus? She’ll have a new herd of useful idiots soon enough”

“Are you planning on using just her? Seems like a bad idea to have a single point of failure”

“Oh no, there are others – like I told you: there are other potential assets, other groups. They just need to hear the right things, or see the right news headlines. We’ll have the city in chaos in no time once that gets started. The trick is that they don’t all have to be on the same side – it actually works better if they start fighting each other – riots are so much more convincing if its two or more groups fighting each other”

“And you have the police handled? They could crush the riots, or nip everything in the bud if they catch on to us”

“Oh they won’t. We have assets that can take out cops for a short while, like with that coati”

“But it didn’t work so well with that fox and rabbit – they didn’t stay in hiding for long enough – and that was all Djalo’s work”

“Perhaps – but I just need a way to leak that bunny’s disgusting dietary and romantic habits so we’re not the source. That’ll destroy her and put Bogo in a bad spot too. That’ll give us a great excuse to replace him with someone weak we can easily manipulate, even if it’s just a temporary replacement while Bogo gets investigated. That’ll keep the cops occupied and demoralized during the riots, if we time things right”

“While I agree bunnies eating meat is weird, then to say that its downright disgusting, that’s just your opinion, just so we’re clear – but I’ll agree that it’s a brilliant move to oust Bogo. How are we going to expose her meat-eating? That idiot private dick Djalo sicked on them was found out too damn quickly, and she helped them find him!”

“She was a quick and dirty solution, Djalo got sloppy – there are far better and more subtle stalkers for hire out there, and I’m already having an asset sorting through them. We just need a good photo or video of her eating something, then we’ll prepare a press package”

“Very well – I’ll await your next progress report. When should I expect it?”

“Give it a few months – it’ll be a while before the lioness get sentenced, and we’ll need to move our other pawns into place for the new way we’re doing this – but the end result will still be the same. There will be city-wide chaos, and with that chaos we will climb to the very top and stay there, lauded as heroes”

“Perfect. End call”

“End recording. Oh I couldn’t agree more…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh snap - who's the shadowy masterminds? Who knows?
> 
> Will Judy ever get a fox-shaped bacon dildo? Depends on how kinky she is!
> 
> Will Nick ever get some of that sweet sweet Bogo-booty? Probably not!
> 
> Will Xander Ferrotesticulous get his rear mongled by hot steamy zebra schlong? Most likely!
> 
>  
> 
> All of this and more, in the thrilling conclusion to this trilogy, in the next and final story!


End file.
